p iec e s

I see myself

See the pieces and think

Why would somebody want this?

How could somebody love this? 

They will say they can and they will try

But they don't see how sharp they are

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Shattered pieces I try to mend again and again

Won't ask for help, oh no

What if someone gets cut with them? 

Couldn't resist the blame

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How did I get here? 

Am I too blame? 

Try not to be hard on myself

But.. am I to blame? 

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Could someone really love this?

Why would they try? 

Do they know they are just seeing the wall I've built around me?

I've made it with my best bits, collected, displayed

Do they still get a sight of my broken pieces? 

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Still, from the inside I look out for something to rely on

Take a peak every now and then

For somewhere to go

For someone to invite inside

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Forgot how tall I'm making these walls

Afraid I won't know when to stop

Don't want to be sitting alone in the dark

I know how fucked up I can be

Beating myself silently where no one can see

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I think I might be befriending me 

But what if I turn the back to myself again? 

Oh god I dread to know

If it will ever stop

If I will ever stop

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I try to mend the pieces

(Oh yes, I made them myself) 

You may want to give it a try and help

Don't be surprised if I won't let you

Shattered them myself, don't want to show you what I've done

I protect them as they are the last thing left of myself

Only thing I remember I can be

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Still.. 

With these pieces in my severed hands

I'm learning to stand, I'm learning to slowly walk 

In the cold, under the moon or under the sun

Step after step

Careful with the thoughts

Blood pumping thanks to a heart that keeps trying

Hopeful heart that won't learn how to resign

Deaf to my mind's daggers, blind to my hurt-filled tears

With this heart and these pieces I walk

I try

And I try

Oh God I try

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I'm still trying.

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Wounded words from a heart that aches and tries

Sometimes won't remember why, but it tries

And will keep trying

Until it learns to run again