NO CANON DYNAMIC YET. QUICK, THROW OUT HYPOTHETICALS

So I just had a thought

What if supernatural creatures don’t exist anymore? What if they did once, but through the years, they slowly mixed in with humans?

You can see the blood of fairies in the way a ballet dancer hovers in mid air before he or she hits the ground. You can see it in the way that middle school girl never forgets when someone makes her a promise. You can see it in how that one little boy in the kindergarten class seems more comfortable in the forest on that field trip than the others.

You can see the blood of dryads in hikers who never trip over roots. You can see it in that suburban grandmother never lets any of her garden die. You can see it in that one kid who climbs a tree faster than his friends, barely looking at the branches as he goes.

You can see the blood of naiads in the way a professional swimmer seems to command the water to help them. You can see it in how a cross country runner needs a water break more often than his teammates. You can see it in the way that one girl in your class always has a water bottle on her desk.

You can see the blood of mermaids in a surfer who can be tossed around underwater for a long time without drowning. You can see it in a teenage boy who doesn’t have to pretend to be unbothered by the pressure when he races his friends to the bottom of a swimming pool. You can see it in the little girl who wades into every stream she sees on a hike without quite knowing why.

You can see the blood of sirens in people who never have a problem with getting people to date them. You can see it in that soprano who can hit notes most of her fellows can only dream of. You can see it in the camp counselor who all the straight girls have a crush on, who can play guitar and sing better than any of the others.

You can see the blood of shapeshifters in the way an actor adjusts their personality to become their character with scary accuracy. You can see it in the subconscious, barely noticeable changes a tween girl’s eyes make to match her outfit better. You can see it in the way you always lose that one friend in a crowd if you’re not careful, because he’s just too good at blending in.

People who carry the blood of werewolves don’t change with the full moon anymore, but you can still see it in the way your best friend always knows something is wrong, though even they don’t know they’re smelling the changes in your body chemistry. You can see it in the way that one guy always seems to eat more than the reasonable amount of red meat at an all-you-can-eat buffet. You can see it in the way that one werido never has a problem when the teacher turns off the lights before a PowerPoint presentation because her eyes adjust quicker and better than yours.

The blood of supernatural creatures may have mostly faded away. But if you look closely, you can still see it.

Nina: you should make me your campaign manager. I was born for politics.

Nina: I have great hair and I love lying.

wylan: *holding a salt packet* It’s just a little sodium chloride. kaz : Actually wylan, it’s salt. wylan: That’s what I said, sodium chloride. kaz : Uh wylan, that would be salt. kaz : *takes salt packer from wylan* This is iodized table salt, which in addition to sodium chloride contains anti-caking agents and potassium iodate, which is added to prevent iodine deficiency. So not only are you being overly pretentious by insisting on using scientific terminology for everyday items, you are factually wrong. Your arrogance is your downfall, you annoying little shit.

Wylan: how you feeling?

Jesper, drunk as fuck: you are so good looking!!

Jesper, puts arms around wylan getting close to him: I wanna make love to you right here, right now! *growls*

Matthias, sitting right next to them: …really wish you wouldn’t…

Inej: Jesper, I need some advice.

Jesper: You need advice from ME?

Inej: Yeah, frightening, isn't it?

'Can I copy your homework?'

Wylan: I can help you with it!

Inej: Yeah, sure.

Jesper: Bold of you to assume I did the homework.

Kaz: Nope.

Nina: Wait, we had homework?!?!?!

Matthias: *Read 5:55pm*

Wesper as parents, based on things my husband and I have actually said in real life.

Wylan: "So you see, if you change this note it turns into a G-sharp harmonic minor scale."

Jesper: "I love your dedication, but you cannot teach music theory to a TODDLER"

___

Jesper: "So, we went to the indoor playground again today!"

Wylan: "When are you finally going to admit you're using our child as an excuse to go on the trampolines?"

Jesper: "Probably when she's 12. We need another kid before that."

___

Wylan: "We have the most beautiful baby in the world."

Jesper: "Honey, you're biased. But yes, we do. Other kids are ugly."

___

Jesper: "So, you know how I love that she calls me Dada and you Papa? Well, just now she yelled 'Dapa' and I'm confused."

Wylan: "Straight people have it so easy."

___

Wylan: "Jesper, what the hell happened to the garlic press?"

Jesper: "Oh, [baby] wanted peanut butter, but we were out, so I decided to make it myself by grinding peanuts!"

Wylan: "... Did it work?"

Jesper: "... No. No, it did not."

___

Kid: "Papa, penis! Penis! Pee pee penis!"

Wylan: "I leave her with Jesper for one day... One fucking day!"

Kid: "Fucking day! Fucking day!"

Wylan: "... Oops."

___

Wylan: "Jesper, stop eating the animal crackers, they're not for you."

___

*toddler is hanging upside down from the upper kitchen cupboard*

Wylan: "Sometimes I think she takes after me. Then she does that and I reconsider."

Jesper: Wylan, I want to make you a promise. I vow to always be by your side…

Wylan: *blushes*

Jesper: … and to never let you do something stupid alone. 

Wylan: *eyes watering* So romantic… 

nina: how many goats do you think i'd be worth in medieval times

kaz: forget medieval times, you're worth about 5 bucks and half a bagel now

Inej: boo!

Jesper: Ah, Stop I nearly dropped my croissaant!!!

jesper: oh my god, the stove is on fire! what should we do?

nina: okay, no worries, we just need an adult

jesper: but WE are adults.

nina: WE NEED AN ADULTER ADULT! WHERE'S MATTHIAS?