Sakit pala kalo harus mikirin besok mau jadi apa terus gimana. Kadang pengen jalani sesuai dengan yang ada alias jalani dulu. Tapi rasa ketar-ketir itu muncul, karena ngerasa planning masih rancu. Sedih. Capek.
Takdir Tuhan tidak ada yang tau. Walaupun udah berdoa setiap pagi dan malam. Hanya lewat waktu. Jadi, bersabarlah.
Day 1 : Describe your personality
I’m Evelyn, 19 years old
Evelyn is quite introverted. Sometimes she can be extrovert maybe just with people she knows. I’m sensitive person but i’m very talktive. Even though, i still can be your bestie. I’m such a loyal friend. I can show that i understand and care about people’s problems. I like making new connections but i’m a little bit picky with some people. I like giving things to others. I’m not really organised but i prefer ‘applies myself’ like i try to do best work that i can. I live with love, fun, and love. Leo is a hard one to please but they have high standards. If you want to know a leo, you should take time and be patient. I know i can’t handle my mood swings and hard to controlling anger. And i like being bossy because i’m a stubborn. One thing that i can remember small details with photos or my brain. So it makes me hard to moving on because i saved everything in my mind. I keep it forever.
I really love pink or something very feminim. I like being cute sometimes but i can be sexy tho. I have dry and sensitive skin. My hair wavy, dry, and maybe damaged. I like playing makeup and i really focus on my skincare. I want to invest my skin for 20 years to go. I believe that it will be worth someday. I don’t really cares about people who talk my bad. I learned from my parents that “not everyone will like us and you live just for you not the others.” Don’t ever mind about haters and fake people.
My love language :
1. Quality time
2. Physical touch
3. Acts of service
If you date me, loyalty and love are basically guaranteed. I’m such a lovely and you will never have question where they stand.
2020, I hate this year. So bad.
I don’t know where to start right now. A year ago someone left me without reason and permission. It really does break my heart though, he was sweet and playful but in the end of the time it started feel like you were in jail with punishment. From that i have learned how to find good people with positive vibes. This year taught me about everything, especially fake people.
But in this year i lost my best friend. We have been friends since elementary school. We were four members. Lately i have been feeling like they became stranger. Or it just my sensitive feeling? I saw them hang out without me and never ask me to join. I’m fine and i just try to think positive. But they had spent a few days together and then posted in social media. I’m sad but i don’t show it to them. And i started think that ok i will never beg them to come over me. Damn, i’m so done with you guys.I think i’m just enough being nice, being there for people who ignore me unless they need me.
My mental health was tested this year like no other 2020. At this point, i feel God blessed me no matter what. Me and my family still be alive this year. I never imagine 2020 will end up being like this. Oh God i’m so tired, i miss my boyfriend toooo :(
someday we will find what we are looking for. or maybe we won't. maybe we will find something much greater than that.
unknown
Saturday, 9 May
Udah lama ga nulis sesuatu, asli rasanya kangen banget buat ceritain segalanya disini. Masih banyak orang gatau tentang ini jadi aku ngerasa bisa bebas dan lega. Well so far, perjalanan hidupku di 2019 sampai 2020 detik ini yang aku rasain adalah banyak berubahnya. Aku sadar disaat tahun lalu tepatnya sedang dalam fase terluka, namun skg udah ada di titik untuk bersyukur karena udah dipertemukan dengan orang yang lebih baik:)
Entahlah sebagai manusia cuman bisa berharap, berdoa, dan berusaha mewujudkan yang terbaik. Untuk selebihnya bisa kita serahin ke Tuhan, karena Tuhan yang mengerti skenario kehidupan kita sebenarnya. Dengan cara apapun Tuhan pasti memberikan yang terbaik dan sesuai porsi kita.
Baru rasain euforianya 2020 beberapa bulan tapi nampaknya dunia lagi ga bersahabat. Dunia lagi ngamuk, mungkin ini bisa kita ambil hikmahnya. Kita bisa lebih menjaga lingkungan, lebih menjaga kebersihan, dan selalu berdoa untuk kebaikan sesama. Itulah namanya rencana Tuhan, ga ada yang tahu dan kita juga ga bisa memastikan kapan ini semua berakhir. Semoga bisa cepat berlalu dan kita bs menjalankan kehidupan dengan baik. Stay safe and stay healthy all!
“Kau boleh saja pergi. Itu hakmu. Tapi jika sudah pernah berjanji untuk selalu ada, aku juga punya hak untuk meminta.”
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You can talk with someone for years, everyday, and still, it won’t mean as much as what you can have when you sit in front of someone, not saying a word, yet you feel that person with your heart, you feel like you have known the person for forever…. connections are made with the heart, not the tongue.
C.JoyBell C. (via perrfectly)