- None of them are gonna be physically violent
- The Reddit users are going to judge you if you express any religious or “unscientific” sentiment
- The Catholics run the gamut from “hardcore pro-lifer” to “Nun who invented communism”
- The Protestants have brought lots of food but are going to proselytize the entire time you eat
- The crystalists are split 60/40 on whether or not vaccines cause autism, and you don’t know who has the majority until you’ve been there an hour
- The Anglophiles have good pastries, but 1/3 of them are in Sherlock cosplay
- The girlbosses are all within 10° to the left of the center of the political spectrum and will try very hard to get you to invest in their MLM
- The vegans brought food but will turn hostile if you let slip that you’ve used animal products in the last year
- The reenactors have booze, but your phone is dead and they’re giving a very pro-America history lecture
- The influencers have a pool, a jacuzzi, and lots of drugs, but they have a combined net worth that teaches seven digits and won’t let you forget it
- The retirees have great weed but they’re gonna ask you a lot of invasive questions and give you a lot of unsolicited advice.
Picked the protestants because I'm a very polite Episcopalian who can totally put up with other people for a bit (and this says Protestants and did not specify American Evanglicals so I can pretend that this means, like, Presbyterians or something). Secondly, I can't eat that much in one sitting these days, so those periods of being talked at would be pretty short. Meaning that the rest of the time we could talk about books, gardening, cats, their kids, the deferred maintenance on their church buildings, the World Cup, etc....
