been thinking a lot about anticipatory grief lately. i love you so much that i know losing you will devastate me. i haven't lost you yet but i already miss you. we still have time, but it won't be enough. i think about what i would say at your funeral, and say some of it to you now cause i need you to know how loved you are before you go. you will go where i cannot follow, but you will never really leave me. it won't make it hurt less but it is a part of healing somehow.

this is actually abt me preparing to lose my grandma, but it can be interpreted in a lot of different ways. grief exists everywhere u look, because love exists everywhere.

you can drink coffee out of a bowl but you have to want it. [Sobbing] [Dry Heaving]

You have to want this

hey I wanted to wish a very special disability pride month to every disabled person who’s getting worse. to people who are losing the ability to do things they used to do. people whose symptoms are increasing in severity. people who are developing new symptoms. people with degenerative and terminal disorders. people who are dealing with new disorders on top of preexisting ones. happy disability pride month to everyone who knows they’re not getting better. there’s nothing wrong with that, and you deserve to take pride as much as anyone else.

things don't always get better forever. you weaken and fade. the pain gets worse. you lose weight, skill, memory. but even still this world is beautiful to the last breath of it. even still every person in it is a wonder. even still the sun too will burn out.

even still: today.

Sumerian Veteran: *has severe PTSD but doesn't know it because the term won't be invented for another 5000 years* I fight the same battle in my dreams every night and my relationship with my family has fallen apart.

Sumerian Healer: *saw hundreds of veterans with the exact same affliction before* You're cursed by desert demons.

actually we have recorded texts of sumerian warriors describing symptoms that closely match ptsd, and the diagnoses was not desert demons, but rather "Those dudes you killed are still attacking you with their ghosts because you killed them"

i just wanna say that even if you have degenerative diseases, life can still get better with age. i don't know how long i have left and i just seem to keep getting sicker, but im steadier and happier and more secure in myself than ever.

i started my 20s healthy and my 30s deathly ill and i'm much happier now. i wouldn't even trade health for everything else i've gained since.

contrary to the popular misconception, health isn't everything or even the most important thing. it's good to have! but you can make a happy life as a sick person, in whatever time you have

really touched that this is starting to reach more people, and the replies and tags and comments are 💙

It's so true. I was diagnosed with autoimmune disease around age 22. I'm 36 now. Married, two kids, back in school, excited for the future. My physical condition is much worse. I'm immeasurably happier and more spiritually fulfilled. I'm excited for what the future will bring, even knowing that one of the things it will bring definitely includes "more physical pain and limitations." The good stuff is better.

HELP

Did you guys know that the most recent version of sharks have fins that are kinda leg like and they like to walk up onto land?

no way i must have missed an update!

The Epaulette shark is only about 9 million years old as a species, making it the most recent branch in the shark family. And it is slowly but surely evolving into a land animal

:p

Astronaut tweets

anyone else wanna hug astronaut Reid Wiseman and weep?

This is so cool

Sometimes to really appreciate a place, you have to leave for awhile.

Welp, this is just about all I want in death.

Like, I want to be made into a beautiful glass thing.  I want to be something treasured for a long time and rarely talked about.  I want to live in the home of someone who loved me, and touched now and then in silent memory.

I want people to forget that I’m in there, I want the memory of what I am to pass out of the family’s knowledge.  I want to be given away, and put out in a thriftstore somewhere.  

I want someone to buy my ashes for $4.99 and put me in a window and love the colors.  I want to cast beautiful, fractious and curving sunlight across the wall, sparkling and glowing and shimmering, depending on the time of day.  I want someone to take a picture of me with the moon behind me, luminous and mysterious.

I want a witch to buy me and put me in her work room.  I want an artist to leave me on their worktable.  I want to inspire people and make them smile.  I want to be warm from sunlight or chilly from the cool air.  I want to be packed in newspaper carefully when they move.  I want to be given as a holiday or graduation present to someone’s kid, I want to be given as a housewarming gift as a reminder of home.

And god, then, hopefully some day, I want to roll off the table, I want that globe to crack.

And then I want to haunt the living shit out of the future.

Holy shit, the comment made this sixty times more awesome and now I want this to be done to me too.

entrap my soul in the swirl orb

Trap my ashes into the glass void

Elodie Under Glass: Literal Version

cats have such a beautiful relationship to space. I’ve never seen an animal so small able to take up half the length of a couch simply by sitting in the least efficient spot possible

The whole bed was unusable. He weighs nine pounds.

Deleting annoying replies is almost as fun as clowning on them. I could make fun of you or I could just unmake you.

Some dipshit: Tell your followers I was based. Tell them I owned you online. Let them see my funny reply.

Me: They will not even know your url

A British soldier looks at gravestones from the desecrated Jewish cemetery of Salonica used to construct Nazi defences. Greece, 1944.

Gonna get a little personal here, but....

I grew up Chabad. I realized that I wasn't straight when I was 13, and my parents found out and forbid me from talking to my friends. For a whole year I was cut off from the friends I had made who had helped me come to terms with my identity. Some of these friends I've never spoken to again, because I didn't have their numbers memorized and it's been so long.

But that was years ago.

My parents have come around for the most part. I'm now in my twenties. I currently identify as a transgender man and bisexual. I wear tzizit and a Kippah, and I'm observant. These two aren't in conflict for me. I keep strict kosher and Shabbat (although I've eaten a non-Chalav Yisrael chocolate and I hated it, American chocolate is disgusting, and I eat gebrochts on Pesach). I'm one of the only "frum" students at my university, and I'm also the president of the LGBTQ organization there. In April, Im Yirtze Hashem I'm going to my first doctor's appointment that'll screen me for and medical issues before I start taking testosterone.

Last Summer, I had the privilege of attending NYC Pride with the LGBTQ Jewish organizations that were part of the parade. We called it Jew York Pride. I made so many new friends who were queer and frum just like me. People who live in the heart of Crown Heights, who go to Yeshiva and seminary, who are gay and bisexual and lesbian and trans and nonbinary and asexual. I had no idea there were so many LGBTQ people within Chabad. Some still identify as Chabad, others don't, but lots are still observant.

There are Orthodox communities that are accepting. On Chanukah I visited a shul that was Orthodox and LGBTQ accepting. We made menorahs while Chaddische music played and there were all kinds of people there. Unfortunately the shul is too far from where I currently live to be walking distance, but hopefully I'll move closer in the next few years.

It's hard. It's not easy. But it's possible, and you have a community of people just like you all around the world.

There are organizations and support groups that specifically cater to Orthodox and observant LGBTQ Jews (this isn't a thorough list of all LGBTQ Jewish organizations, just a few I selected that are specifically for LGBTQ observant Jews):

North America:

Eshel

JQY

Kesher Families

Israel:

Havruta

Shoval

Online Support Network:

LGBTQ Chabad

This is just a very basic list, and if you're not from North America or Israel there are other organizations around the world, these are just a few I selected.

If you ever want to talk to me, please don't hesitate to reach out. You are not alone- you are among so so many people like you.

Find someone who supports you like this cat supports his owner’s music

via @sarperduman

OH MY GOD THE cat is enchanted

@corixr

I like to think this piece is called “The Kitten’s Lullaby”, and it was considerately written not to use the very keys his cat occupies.

Sarper actually does write the music he plays on Instagram, and that one of his (nineteen) rescue cats is a regular at the piano, so it’s very, very likely he wrote that piece with his little friend’s comfort in mind.

He has a crowdfunding page for his rescue kitties, because feeding and caring for 19 cats on a piano teacher’s salary is…difficult. Please consider donating if you’re in a position to do so!

https://gogetfunding.com/help-me-take-care-of-my-19-rescued-cats-3/

Love the universe need of all babies human and animal to just lay on adults

A collection

Further proof

Now I remember your name!

TO THE SPIRITED WORLD 🔮