dorkle

Make bananas by sucking the potassium from the bloodstream of random people

ser what the FUCK

You heard me.

My students’ adventures in trying to spell “tragedy” for their Romeo and Juliet quiz.

F-

i am thinking how much poorer, how much less colorful the world would be if art was only made by "professionals." if all the music, all the stories, all the sketches & paintings & craftwork of the world was created only by the small category of people able to make a decent living from their art. imagine if the only people allowed to create were the experts & the renowned & those aspiring to the top. what a grey world that would be. how much joy would be bleached away! i love you people who create for the sake of creating, i love you artists who do art for tiny audiences, i love you people who make things even just for one person, even just for themselves, even if no one's watching, thank you thank you thank you for decorating the world in which we all exist

#related: the most powerful crafters alive are crocheters who spend 7+ years making an intricate table cloth no one is allowed to eat on #all that arcane magic into making a display object primarily for their own enjoyment #and that of the blessed few lucky enough to be invited into their home to behold what is by rights a sacred object #if you spend a certain number of hours crafting something u have the right to have it put in a shrine or museum of your choosing i think #you have imbued it with your Life Essence by sheer force of concentration and obsession it is Holy now #anyways. old ladies who knit/crochet/embroider etc are a thousands times more powerful and intimidating than old white dudes who are obsessed with war memorabilia or whatever #i have nothing but respect awe and appropriate amounts of fear towards crafters. my liege

Please make this a political leaning chart

why did you have to call me the fuck out like this

As part of the "Moving away from suicide jokes" thing I've been personally doing I have wandered into the possibly unintended but not unwelcome side effect that me and all my friends call each other hot, sexy, steaming, stellar, and more just on a daily basis. No smoking sign? You better get outta here, you're smoking hot.

Frog Duo, Frog Duo, what shenanigans will they get up to?

1 - 2

The one at the top is terrifying

your old pal pukicho is not in the best spirits today. ur ol pal pukicho needs some cheering up

my enemy is finally weakened. time to strike.

In case it wasn’t clear: if you are playing the h*gwarts game do us a favor and die painfully as soon as possible. Literally everything I hear about the game is terrible both from the perspective of being a decent human being AND any sort of gameplay/performance aspect I literally cannot see why anyone who is not a racist transphobe whose only hobby is giving racist transphobes money would spend any time or money in support of this game.

This is my final post about this because the sooner this game gets the ET treatment the better.

Not everyone knows about the royalties. I'm so sick of these posts belittling people who have bought the game, say that to people who *probably* know about where the money goes and support the cause, or to the people who just don't care.

And in all honesty, people just want to play the game. That's it, they just want to enjoy the world and it's content.

what if you focused on something long enough to complicate it

how dare u

Kael’thal’s sign for the public <3

Says the guy with the letter 'i' for a beard!!!

Lol jk, great art :)

Finishing off the year with an idea I've wanted to paint for a while, a cat in the clouds ☁️

Hi everyone!

I've been overwhelmed with the positive response to some of my recent artworks - I've decided to open pre-orders for prints this time around so I can get them in sooner for people and have a better idea of how many I need ☺️

Visit my online store to pre-order now - www.cosmoskitty.com/shop

Inaccurate, the cat would most definitely try to play with the plane.

I can think of two examples in which people bought animals as gifts at the store I worked in that were 100% good.

One: a woman came in to buy a half-dozen baby angels for her grandmother. Her grandmother had a large tank for angelfish and corydoras and over the last year had lost her entire school of angels to old age. She had a hard time traveling and couldn’t go out to pick new fish herself so all she wanted for Christmas was new angels, and that’s exactly what her daughter got her.

Two: a couple bought a new house with a large, established pond on the property. The pond had no fish in it because the previous owners took them with them, I think, and the new owners were really looking forwards to getting livestock in it again, so they celebrated their move-in not with a housewarming party, but a pondwarming party, and told their guests that instead of gifts for inside, they wanted koi. Our store was on the way to the party and we were known for our extensive koi selection so we sold about twenty to various guests. It was a fun afternoon and since we knew what other people had picked out, we made sure they got an awesome set.

In both cases, the gift recipients 1) had empty, ready housing for new pets and 2) were explicit they wanted new pets and 3) were explicit exactly what kind went in the space they had. (I do think we sold a few goldfish for the koi party but if I remember correctly, they were lemon-colored commons, which are hard to come by in America, and thus worthy of gifting.)

Okay, THIS. 

Let me tell you about being the kid given a pet without warning. 

We had a tank of goldfish. Big, beautiful, aggressively eaty goldfish. 

We also had a houseguest for several months including over Christmas. 

So one day mom and I get back home from school/work, to find the houseguest sitting smugly on the couch, informing us that she’s “bought me a present” and that when we see it we will be excited and floored. Now I being the kind of person who WILDLY DISLIKES SURPRISES, I started freaking out a little because WHAT HAVE YOU DOOOOOOONE???? 

Bitch had plopped a glorious red fantail betta into my tank of goldfish and the poor little dude had already lost a significant chunk of fin to marauding goldfish, almost all of whom were at least twice his size. 

This is not even touching on the fact that goldfish can survive frozen in ice and Betta are tropical. 

So yeah, we scooped him up and dug up an old aquarium heater from god-knows-where (might have needed a specialty trip to the town twenty miles away, but I can’t remember a decade and a half later) and he recovered nicely from the fin damage and lived another three years, which seems to be about average for bettas, but DEAR GOD did this need to not happen. 

just watched the new puss in boots movie, might be a furry now

Not that I would consider myself attracted to death, but I completely understand XD

you WILL look at the cookies wife and I have made

fucking stylish