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grande despresso

@donneiver

i can't remember the fucking password to my other tumblr so now we're here
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my favorite relationship is the one between humans and dandelions. in childhood we instinctively blow on its little fuzzy seed carriers. we take the role of the wind, we help the dandelions in a crucial part of their lives, and in return we get a wish and a moment of happiness. this is how nature is meant to work. we are just as unaware of our goodness as the honey bees are, pollinating the flowers 

When I was a little girl I convinced most of the girls in my grade to fill up a ziplock full of dandelion fluff at home and bring it out to recess. I told them we were obligated to do this because dandelions are created by God and it’s our moral obligation to spread the seeds (we went to a Catholic school so this argument was infallible). At recess we all stood like 3 feet apart from each other in the soccer field and dumped out our seed bags. It was chaos, especially because the teachers had no idea it was happening until too late.

Long story short, there were about 1,000 more dandelions that year and we had to bring home little memos on bright orange paper that children were not allowed to bring dandelion fluff to school in ziplock bags, which my mom looked at when I brought it home, and said, “Did someone actually do this?” Completely unaware that it was her own daughter who started the riotous seedbombing

it would take 2.3 million years for Jeff Bezos to earn his $183.3b net worth working 24 hours a day at New Mexico’s $9/hr minimum wage.

That’s 11.5 times longer than the human race has existed.

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Not long enough.

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What if we gave it a twist? Rather than earning that amount of money, what if it was to save that amount while still paying bills and feeding himself?

And since it IS hell, his car starts making a Noise about once a month.

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huh

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Let’s go over some things, shall we?

  • Jenny was originally designed to be a shape-shifting superhero; her “pigtails” are rocket thrusters, and her entire body can morph and shift to create weapons. Given her standard appearance is more to look like a humanoid girl, it seems reasonable that that’s an appearance she chose, rather than her default, especially because we know she can modify her appearance however she likes, albeit restricted to her two base colors unless she gets a new paint-job.
  • Though her mother learns to be more supportive of her later on, Jenny was originally confined to house arrest save for doing her job, supposedly because the world around her wouldn’t accept her.
  • She is canonically six-foot-six, which is rather tall, though it seems the average height of humanity has also gone up. So it’s not too uncommon for other men to be taller than her, but she’s also taller than most people. She has so far only dated other men who are taller than her.
  • She gains two different disguises for looking human. The first one doesn’t pass at all, while the second passing one convinces her to behave like a normal human girl, whispering into her ear to not only look, but behave like a “normal” girl, even if it’s not in her best interests.
  • It’s evidently quite common for androids to be made from different base personality points- Kenny, a boy she dated for a little while, was a re-purposed dog robot, and still carried over some of his dog traits.
  • The two most popular girls in school specifically have it out for her, because she’s a robot “pretending” to be a girl.
  • Jenny is allowed to play in her high school’s male football team.

Don’t forget this scene: 

I’d suspected Jenny was trans coded for a long time, but this scene was what had me 100% convinced. 

Prior to this episode Jenny had always treated Ms. Wakeman as her mother, always referring to her as “mom/mother”; which caused Wakeman to be mocked by her peers. Ms. Wakeman was typically cold towards Jenny, always referring to her as XJ9 (essentially Jenny’s deadname) and usually treating her as nothing more than a defence droid. But in this scene Ms. Wakeman is actually seeing Jenny in danger and rushes to protect her, finally calling her “my daughter” for the first time. As soon as she does, the pure joy and amazement in Jenny’s voice just makes my heart swell. 

This show is so incredible and SO ahead of it’s time. 

Worth noting that the creator of the show acknowledged this, basically saying “We didn’t intend for Jenny to be trans coded, but we’re ecstatic that trans people are finding comfort in her. Just because we didn’t intend the subtext doesn’t mean it’s not there.” Very cool and way the hell better than Hartman handles shit like this.

my brothers share special interests and my favorite thing to do is walk in a room and be like "hey guys can you tell me about the mariana trench" and then sit there for an hour while they both infodump to me about the ocean it's extremely entertaining

and my parents are always like "oh my god why would you do that" bitch. I want to learn about the ocean and these two thirteen year old boys r my most trusted source

fr

I mean, I could google questions I have about medieval weaponry and horsemanship, but on the other hand I could message my sister the simple statement “have question about historical saddles” and get both a phone call and a comprehensive 3 page google document within an hour

Seriously, if you know someone who has a special interest you’d like info about, go ask them! It costs zero money, you make them happy, and you learn way more than a basic google search would tell you.

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Asking is a love language

Asking is a love language

fake dating to lovers is nice but married for non-romantic reasons to lovers is next fucking level

you can evade those taxes but you can't evade your feelings

“As early as the 1920s, researchers giving IQ tests to non-Westerners realized that any test of intelligence is strongly, if subtly, imbued with cultural biases… Samoans, when given a test requiring them to trace a route form point A to point B, often chose not the most direct route (the “correct” answer), but rather the most aesthetically pleasing one. Australian aborigines find it difficult to understand why a friend would ask them to solve a difficult puzzle and not help them with it. Indeed, the assumption that one must provide answers alone, without assistance from those who are older and wiser, is a statement about the culture-bound view of intelligence. Certainly the smartest thing to do, when face with a difficult problem, is to seek the advice of more experienced relatives and friends!”

— Jonathan Marks - Anthropology and the Bell Curve (via leofarto)

enough “chicken soup for the soul.” how about some chicken soup for the hole

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that’s just regular chicken soup

not gonna lie i forgot mouths existed

Seriously like people around my age (I’m 24) genuinely think they’re old and I’m like dude what the fuck you’re not even close to being old. But I think it’s because a lot of young people don’t interact with people who’re older than them. Like, one of my closest friends is in her 40s (which isn’t old but obvi is older than me) and she’s a fucking badass musician, does theatre, recently self published her poetry book, and so much more. She has a friend around her age who’s also a musician and another badass lady I completely adore. I had a coworker in her 60s who gave massages and sold weed at her house as a side gig lmao like I genuinely don’t think younger people realize that older people have lives and have fun just like us younger people do