Dissociation Days

If an experience is impacting your daily life, then it is important to seek help in relation to it. It sounds like the derealisation you experience is causing you significant difficulty and perhaps distress. I think it would be useful to talk to your parents and seek some support with this so you can move forwards. Check out the grounding techniques you can find online for the short term and then look for some assistance in the shorter term. Good luck 💙

That’s a hard one, maybe it is because when you know where you Dad is and what he is doing, it feels more predictable and you feel slightly safer than when you don’t know exactly where he is or what he is up to? Just a thought? Good Luck 💙

That is a hard one, I use reminders on my phone a lot to prompt me to eat at regular intervals and remember meds and I have also in the past created a self-care chart so I can record what I have managed to do of basic self care tasks, and then that has helped me highlight where I was perhaps struggling with things. Do you have anyone who can prompt you to eat something at any point? Another idea is to do some preparation of small meals when you are up to it, and in that case when you are present enough to eat you have something quickly prepared, but I understand stress and depression means you can really not feel like eating, so perhaps just try little bits often. I would also recommend also always having a drink available, so you do not get dehydrated. Good Luck

Hi, wow that is brave and courageous, well done. I hope they are being accepting. So the best way to prevent and ground yourself from dissociation is to use grounding techniques, these can be found in many of our posts or under the grounding hashtag on tumblr, or on the grounding tab on our page on a laptop. Some basics are to use your senses, using an ice pack to press gently somewhere it would feel OK to, a smell you associate with a positive memory, songs you can listen to that bring you to the here and now, walking without shoes on to feel connected to the floor, eating or drinking something sweet, bitter, sour or sweet or rubbing moisturising cream into your hands or anywhere you like firmly, connecting back with yourself. I hope some of these or more you can find online help you in staying more grounded. Good Luck

That is so positive! It is so good for me and our followers to hear this! I am really  pleased EMDR is helping you to start taking steps in the right direction, that is brilliant! Keep going and feel free to update us like this anytime. Good Luck

That is a really tough one, I think it is important as soon as you are able, if you haven’t already, to move out from living with your Dad, because then you can choose to see him if you wish, when you want and on your terms. There is no right or wrong about forgiving people, you must do what is right for you. If you do not think forgiving him will help you move on, whether he is your Dad or not, you should try to follow your gut instinct. Continuing abusive relationships, even those from the past is hugely draining and difficult. It may be that you don’t forgive him, but you also do not kick him out, you simply set the rules now, when and where does he see you and on your terms. So you feel like you are in control. Ultimately it is a choice, but I would say unless there are really positive reasons for keeping your Dad in your life, the negatives might outweigh the positives. You are right he is your Dad, and it is so complex and painful, but he has not done the right things to you or by you. I would write some lists about pros and cons of staying in contact and about what is most important to you. Stay Strong. Good Luck

This is a big question, and one I cannot answer. It depends however, some people have an “inner world” where there parts or them selves go when they dissociate, others, like myself simply don’t know and are just in a “black hole” as it were with no experience or memories. Some people who are dissociating partially due to stress or trauma may be transported back in time to that traumatic event or time. Good Luck

Technically no, to have confirmed DID it is required to be diagnosed by a psychiatrist of clinical psychologist and there are diagnostic tests for it. Some doctors would not accept you had it unless you were properly diagnosed. However, if you identify with the symptoms and find it helpful to your life to live and state that you have DID, no one is stopping you from doing it either. There is a big debate on self-diagnosis, my opinion is, is that if it helpful and improves your quality of life then that is great, but often people self-diagnose and research diagnoses for the wrong reasons. Good Luck

Dissociative fugue mainly is an acute and maybe a prolonged period of forgetting personal information in particular amongst other symptoms, however this can also happen during dissociative amnesia. Good Luck

This sounds like a long period of depersonalisation, although I cannot diagnose. Some body focussed grounding may help. Like a cold shower, or using a strong smelling body scrub or moisturiser you like the smell of. You could also look through some pictures of yourself and whilst smelling something that reminds you of a good memory where you felt yourself. Also take a look at grounding ideas on our page or the grounding tag on tumblr. Good Luck 💜

Some support for the previous anon. 💪🏻💜💪🏻

Yes it makes sense. This could be a dissociative experience, even with the age of your trauma. But I cannot diagnose. As you have awareness you aren’t experience full amnesia but it could be diassociative in origin. Or it could be some level of subconscious driveto act an age you felt safe and happy at. Either way if this is troubling you I would seek some advice from a psychiatric professional. Whether it is dissociative or more “chosen” it doesn’t matter. Your experiences are valid and you deserve support. Good Luck 💜

Forgiving abusers is a difficult and emotive topic. My personal opinion is that the forgiveness should be about you this time. Not them. If you get something positive from forgiving them, then that is worth trying to do. If it makes you feel worse about things or you don’t feel comfortable with it, then don’t. Forgiving abusers is a personal choice and should be done for yourself and your healing journey, not for others. Especially not for the abuser themself. I personally will not forgive mine, but I will accept what has happened and move forward with the consequences I carry as a result of their actions. Good Luck 💙

Yes, this is absolutely possible. Nightmares with a level of threat similar to the trauma or similar feelings associated but coming from a different prompting event are likely to be part of PTSD, if you meet the other criteria. Good Luck 💙

Sorry didn’t see this one. I think being open with her will help this situation, as at the moment she has no context or explanation for why you are so different at points. I’m so glad you have found our blog helpful!! Good Luck 💙

Hi. This sounds hard and scary for you. I think it might help to have a chat with her and using words and descriptions and a level of sharing you are comfortable with, let her have an insight into why you respond the way you do. This may help her understand and be more compassionate towards you. You could say you have had some difficult past experiences that have left you often feeling anxious, which may look like you are angry but it is really just that your brain has so much to cope with it doesn’t have extra room to be very smiley and polite and your “normal self”. Good Luck 💙

If everyone says they forget everything totally it is likely they are potentially not telling the truth. Dissociation is on a spectrum, and actually full dissociative amnesia is far less common than other the other experiences that you describe. The experience you have, known as derealisation is far more common. Your experience is 110% valid and if you can relate to the symptoms, then that is OK. You don’t need a diagnosis to feel that a diagnosis resonates with you and ask questions and look for help. Good Luck 💙

Hi Olivia, of course it is OK to remain anonymous, it is great you have been doing better dissociation wise the last year, that is a huge step. I get that it can be scary explaining things to loved ones. I find some level of honesty is the best policy though (cliche I know!) I would explain that you sometimes (when stressed or emotional - or whatever you want to say in here depending on what you want to share) become a bit overwhelmed and the way your brain deals with this is by spacing out a bit or you could say “becoming distant or tired”. Explain to her that this has happened for a while and that it is not to do with her, and then maybe see if she would like to support you with grounding as having someone there to help you can be really helpful and beneficial. I would have a chat when you are both calm and having a quiet time without too many others around if possible and I would suggest being as open and honest in your communication, and ask her to do the same in so far as possible, so you do not excessively worry about her thoughts etc. Then you could move onto how you have progressed a lot, but at the moment you are experiencing more spacey episodes and you wanted to let her know and also perhaps let her know how she might be able to help. Feel free to ask anything else if you need to. Good Luck

This is a really tough one and I am sorry to hear you are all struggling so much. My suggestion would be the following - you say his english is “passable” - does he speak another language? Or is he more quiet and doesn’t understand or cannot form words/sentences. If he speaks a different language I would suggest writing some notes or signs in the language he speaks - using a translation website. Or you could try drawing some pictures as a message. Do you have anyone around who could help you with that communication? Have you asked internally (if any of you can do that) if there are any parts who could help with this situation. Perhaps to alleviate some of the frustration and fear he may be experiencing could you buy a sports item like a football or baseball (depending on what kind of athlete he is?) so he can at least use that item as a distraction or as some assistance to alleviate his distress? I am concerned to hear things have happened that have led to a host split - are you safe? If you are in danger now or potentially in the future, please seek the right kind of help from an appropriate service. Good Luck and do keep me updated, I will keep thinking of some ideas

Yes it is possible that that could be linked to a dissociative experience. I cannot diagnose as I am not a clinician, however if you do not have a physical health problem that explains these experiences then it is likely to be a mild and transient dissociative episode that sounds most like the experience of depersonalisation and derealisation. Good Luck