It's weird writing in my paper diary and finding myself reflexively apologizing for liking "bad" media. Like girl you internalized that tumbnopticon
Tumblr is still better than Twitter in this regard though
It's weird writing in my paper diary and finding myself reflexively apologizing for liking "bad" media. Like girl you internalized that tumbnopticon
I don't believe in the idea of "don't bring ur guitar to the party". best party I've been to got kickstarted by the guitar guy getting a bunch of ppl to sing freak on a leash round the campfire with him, and hearing a bunch of drunk nerds trying to do jon davis scatting is incredible.
One time my friends and I were playing a (kind of slow paced) board game and passing a guitar around simultaneously so that it was basically traveling around the circle across from the person taking their turn and it was legitimately so much fun and more people should try it
All this to say, I've noticed a trend in my local corners of trans discourse to treat self-identification as a rock-hard foundation of moral categories and I just think that in a world where both gaslighting and OCD exist maybe we shouldn't
When it comes to squishy matters of identity and internality, a lot of people's attempts at inclusiveness end up being exclusionist in practice.
For example, "all nonbinary people are trans by definition" was a popular statement around the time I was figuring out my gender, and it was meant be supportive of nonbinary people, but its practical effect was pushing me farther back into the closet and delaying my coming out, because what it essentially said to me was you "you cannot call yourself nonbinary unless you can call yourself trans" and in my eyes I was not "allowed" to call myself trans because I was still using my birth pronouns and presenting as a cis man at work (which at that time was most of my waking hours weeeeeeeeeee).
Likewise, "all trans women are beautiful" feels like a threat when it's voiced by people who only reblog pictures of conventionally attractive passing thin white trans women.
Every time I make a viral post about mental illness or neurodivergency I get people in my notes saying "I'm not officially diagnosed but" and I don't know how to break it to them that I'm not either, I just read a lot and think about what I read
"But what if you're wrong about what you have?" Then I made a mistake about something localized entirely within my own brain and it's no business of yours
"But what if you misrepresent one of the conditions?" Okay that one is actually a legitimate concern, and I handle it by listening to a wide variety of people who have the condition so I don't accidentally exclude their experiences
Getting an official diagnosis will not protect you from being wrong. Getting an official diagnosis will not protect you from making sweeping generalizations. Some of the worst offenders when it comes to misrepresenting autism are financially stable white people with official diagnoses.
Every time I make a viral post about mental illness or neurodivergency I get people in my notes saying "I'm not officially diagnosed but" and I don't know how to break it to them that I'm not either, I just read a lot and think about what I read
"But what if you're wrong about what you have?" Then I made a mistake about something localized entirely within my own brain and it's no business of yours
"But what if you misrepresent one of the conditions?" Okay that one is actually a legitimate concern, and I handle it by listening to a wide variety of people who have the condition so I don't accidentally exclude their experiences
Every time I make a viral post about mental illness or neurodivergency I get people in my notes saying "I'm not officially diagnosed but" and I don't know how to break it to them that I'm not either, I just read a lot and think about what I read
"But what if you're wrong about what you have?" Then I made a mistake about something localized entirely within my own brain and it's no business of yours
Every time I make a viral post about mental illness or neurodivergency I get people in my notes saying "I'm not officially diagnosed but" and I don't know how to break it to them that I'm not either, I just read a lot and think about what I read
on one hand the whole AGP narrative is transparently nonsense, on the other hand if someone did tell me that they transitioned primarily as a sex thing i'd be like "oh, based"
I got into it as a sex thing but it turns out there were reasons for the sex thing
Good point! It’s really common for unacknowledged fundamental needs in your life to be first expressed through sex things, so it’s not particularly surprising that for some people ‘what if my body or gender expression was different,? that’s be so hot’ is a first step towards realizing that they’re trans.
But also, if someone is in the ‘this is hot!’ stage forever and it is never anything else than that: based. Have fun with it. It’s your life and your body. Go for it.
Yeah for a lot of adults sex is unique in offering the combination of freedom to be playful and respect for their needs and boundaries and a baseline expectation of confidentiality. It's no wonder that buried parts of the self tend to bubble up.
Mental illness symptom management is just as important if not more important than mental illness symptom reduction
When you attach moral high ground to being symptom-free, you incentivize people to act in cruel and selfish ways. The completely reasonable "you have a right to protect your mental health" becomes replaced with the stricter "you are morally obligated to protect your mental health" which leads to "you must not contaminate yourself by associating with loonies and psychos" which means, in effect, pulling the ladder up after you.
Mental illness symptom management is just as important if not more important than mental illness symptom reduction
social pressure on people to disclose trauma to justify their actions is bad. just straightforwardly bad. it’s incredibly wild to me how normalised it is to talk like it’s ethically or politically good to require ppl to tell you about horrible experiences they have or haven’t had before you’ll let them talk about abuse or something
An important part of responsible social media usage is recognizing that the more followers you get the more damage you can do by "just thinking out loud"
Once you cross the thousand follower mark you should have a smaller side account that you can use for thinking out loud
An important part of responsible social media usage is recognizing that the more followers you get the more damage you can do by "just thinking out loud"
There's a lot of things I hate about internet censorship of sex workers and one of them is the gaslighty that platforms go about trying to hide what they're doing. Like they really will try to set up their UI so that you will think that you mistyped someone's name, or misremembered it, rather than that they suppressed this person's content.
And if your friends are naive? They will inadvertently join in on making you doubt your memory. Are you sure you spelled their name correctly? Cause I'm not getting any search results when I type it in.
The first moral of this story is listen to sex workers. The second moral of this story is do not trust large scale social media sites.
This doesn't mean you're obligated to hate those sites though! You can love the house you live in, while still acknowledging that your relationship to your landlord is an inherently imbalanced one.
There's a lot of things I hate about internet censorship of sex workers and one of them is the gaslighty that platforms go about trying to hide what they're doing. Like they really will try to set up their UI so that you will think that you mistyped someone's name, or misremembered it, rather than that they suppressed this person's content.
And if your friends are naive? They will inadvertently join in on making you doubt your memory. Are you sure you spelled their name correctly? Cause I'm not getting any search results when I type it in.
The first moral of this story is listen to sex workers. The second moral of this story is do not trust large scale social media sites.
There's a lot of things I hate about internet censorship of sex workers and one of them is the gaslighty that platforms go about trying to hide what they're doing. Like they really will try to set up their UI so that you will think that you mistyped someone's name, or misremembered it, rather than that they suppressed this person's content.
And if your friends are naive? They will inadvertently join in on making you doubt your memory. Are you sure you spelled their name correctly? Cause I'm not getting any search results when I type it in.
There's a lot of things I hate about internet censorship of sex workers and one of them is the gaslighty that platforms go about trying to hide what they're doing. Like they really will try to set up their UI so that you will think that you mistyped someone's name, or misremembered it, rather than that they suppressed this person's content.