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I will always be your broken hearted savior

@dirtyrobber70

Gen X, lesbian, she/her. Mostly Rizzles but other wlw ships, poetry, stars and trees and whatnot

Do Not Let HR do this to you. It is not illegal to talk about wages in the work place. I did and got a 12% raise!

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True info. Now let me add something: The power of documentation. (I was a long time steward in a nurses union.)

Remember: The "'E" in email stands for evidence.

That cuts both ways. Be careful what you put into an email. It never really goes away and can be used against you.

But can also be a powerful tool for workplace fairness.

Case 1: Your supervisor asks you to do something you know is either illegal or against company policy. A verbal request. If things go wrong, you can count on them denying that they ever told you to do that. You go back to your desk, or wherever and you send them an email: "I just want to make sure that I understood correctly that you want me to do xxxxx" Quite often, once they see it in writing, they will change their mind about having you do it. If not, you have documentation.

Case 2: You have a schedule you like, you've had that schedule for a while, it works for you. Your supervisor comes to you and says "We're really short-handed now and I need you to change your schedule just for a month until we can get someone else hired. It's just temporary and you can have your old schedule back after a month." A month goes by and they forget entirely that they made that promise to you. So, once again, when they make the initial request, you send them an email "I'm happy to help out temporarily, but just want to make sure I understand correctly that I will get my old schedule back after a month as you promised." Documentation.

[Image ID: Text reading: In the middle of a busy clinic at our practice, I got pulled in by my manager to speak to HR, who must have made a special trip because she lives several states away, and told I was being 'investigated' for discussing wages with my other employees. She told me it was against company policy to discuss wages.

Me; That's illegal.

Them: (start italics) three slow, long seconds of staring at me blankly (end italics) Uh...

Me: That's an illegal policy to have. The right to discuss wages is a right protected by the National Labor Relations board. I used to be in a union. I know this.

HR: Oh, this is news to me! I have been working HR for 18 years and I never knew that. Haha. Well try not do do it anyway, it makes people upset, haha.

Me: people are entitled to their opinions about what their work is worth. Bye.

I then left, and sent her several texts and emails saying I would like a copy of their company policy to see where this wage discussion policy was kept. She quickly called me back in to her office.

HR: You know what, there is no policy like that in the handbook! I double check. Sorry about the confusion, my apologies.

Me: You still haven't given me the paper saying that we had this discussion. I am going to need some protection against retaliation.

HR: Oh haha yes here you go.

I just received a paper with legal letterhead and an apology saying there was no verbal warning or write up. Don't even take their shit you guys. Keep talking about wages. Know your worth. /End ID]

At one of my old (shit) jobs my boss would continually come have these verbal discussions with me and would never put anything in writing I took to summarizing every discussion we had in email. Like “just to confirm that you asked me to do X by Y date and you understand that means I won’t be able to complete the previous task you gave me until Z date - 2 weeks later than originally scheduled - because you want me to prioritize this new project.

The woman would then storm back into my office screaming at me for putting the discussion in writing and arguing about pushing back the other project or whatever. At which point I would summarize that conversation in email as well. Which would bring her storming back in, rinse and repeat ad nauseum.

Anyway I cannot imagine how badly that job would have gone if I hadn’t put all her wildly unreasonable demands in writing. Bitch still hated me but she could never hang me for “missing deadlines” because I always had in writing that she’d pushed the project back because she wanted something else done first.

Paper your asses babes. Do not let them get away with shit. If they won’t put what they’re asking you to do in writing then write it up yourself and email it to them.

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If you don't have this kind of job but someday you'd might: start practicing.

After a casual conversation with friends, write up a brief synopsis of what you discussed & agreed to. (...Do not email this to friends unless you have their agreement that this would be a fun group project.) Get practice with,

"A, B, and C had a brief meeting about food options after the big game. We decided on pizza, with A&B agreeing to contribute X dollars each, and C agreeing to contribute Y dollars and also bring soda. A will call for pizza on the day of the game and schedule it for delivery at 8:30 pm."

"A, B & C discussed movie options. A wanted something lite and fun; B wanted something scifi; C was fine with anything but horror. Nobody wanted superheroes. Decided on Lost Space Wanderers which opened last weekend; C agreed to research theatre options and report tomorrow."

...and so on. Practice describing the results of "meetings" with friends and you'll be ready to sum up "boss told me to set aside Project A to focus on Project B for the next two weeks" - because what's likely is that boss didn't say anything that clear; boss talked about how important Project B is and how the company needs parts X and Y done asap and you have the best skills for that, and when you mentioned how much time Project A was taking, boss said "eh don't worry about that right now; marketing is breathing down my neck so we really need part X by Friday, okay?"

...at no point did you get a direct instruction.

Which is why anyone who is not the screaming-drama boss mentioned above would think it was perfectly reasonable for you to say, "I want to clarify the discussion we had earlier - you told me to focus on Project B to the exclusion of Project A for the next two weeks, even if that means Project A will miss its deadline; is that correct?"

Genuine question: what do I do when the boss in question doesn’t reply to my confirmation email, then says that he never approved the project delay?

In person or over the phone you say "that doesn't match with my memory of the project but let me check my records and I'll get back to you about what happened on this project." Then go back to your desk and write the pettiest email in the world.

To: Boss

From: you

Cc: work group, team lead, project partner, direct supervisor, etc.

(Depending on severity of problem) Bcc: your personal email

"Hi Boss, I'm trying to resolve some confusion here. After our conversation about priority projects on [date] I reached out to you for confirmation of these details (see attached outlook item) and didn't receive an update to the timeline since that communication. I have been working from the agenda we discussed (summarized in attached outlook item from [date]) in absence of further direction. Do you have a copy of your response updating the changes or correcting mistakes in my summary? It's possible that I didn't see your email and I'd like to identify where a communication was missed so that we can avoid issues like this in future projects.

Best,

[Name]"

For this to work you have to be militant about sending summary emails and firm with coworkers and supervisors that you will be documenting project plans via email, but once they're used to your MO it's worth the work.

we are in a media literacy crisis

friendly reminder that characters don't need to be saints to be entertaining. and telling a story does not mean endorsement. art does not need to be all about morally good people.

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IDK if this was meant as hyperbole but it's literally true:

We are genuinely in a crisis of media literacy, with ever fewer genuinely factual resources available in the style and language used by contemporary audiences.

It may sound condescending, but we genuinely need to remind people, or worse, explain to them for the first time that art is not evidence of real world behaviour.

So, thank you, for this reminder. Genuinely.

You're correct:

Art does not need to feature exclusively morally pure characters. Art is not proof of the creator's secret, violent desires.

Anonymous asked:

Top 5 jealous Jane or Maura scenes? Can be a mix of both 🥰 - from both show and fic

Oh excellent! I’m going to cheat and use my own fic for one 😂

A) Jane jealous of Tommy when she says “what, Tommy make you sign a title 18 too?”

B) Jane jealous of Ian - so put out that Maura lies to her 😭

C) Maura jealous of Casey - “how will I live without my best friend?”

D) Maura jealous at Walt Disney World in the Pyrite universe 😂 that was a naughty chapter

E) Jane jealous of Frankie “kissing” Maura during the bomb scare and telling him that it’s not good to fool around with coworkers all with that sad, solemn, handsome face 🫦

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I love how different forms of art are all obsessed with each other. A book tries to capture the feeling of music, a painting tries to depict a scene in a book, a song tries to paint a picture. And it's always insufficient. No single form of art can encapsulate another form of art and capture the essence of it – but it tries, and its attempts are impossibly compelling. All the forms of art are in love with each other and spend so much time trying to express what makes the other kinds of art so lovely.

Nah, fam. It's not about "taking" criticism. It's about the fact that unless a writer asks for it specifically, it's a dick thing to do on a website that is rooted in community.

If a writer wants critique they will ask trusted friends or professional associates (in the relevant field). When a writer shares a fic on AO3 it's not necessarily with the aim of improving their craft (there are better places for that). It's about sharing joy.

Positive comments enhance that feeling of joy and community. Negative comments do not.

Fic isn't a product to be evaluated. If it's not for you, then you can just walk away. 😁

I'm so tired of this discussion - why do all these people think they're entitled to offer critique on a fic author's work?

When you get a hand-made gift from someone, do you verbally rip it apart in front of them and point out every flaw or perceived flaw you can find? Congratulations, that person will never put the time, love and effort into making anything for you again, and they may question themselves so much they won't ever make anything for anyone else again, either. Well done, you've now deprived a whole community of art and an artist of their source of joy because you're an ungrateful walnut who can't say 'Thank you' and appreciate what you got for free.

Your opinion is not universal. Your tastes are not universal. Your preferred style is not universal. Authors can write whatever the fuck they want and unless you specifically commissioned a fic, you get no say in it.

Tl;dnr: If you don't like a fic or piece of art, hit the back button and keep your mouth shut. If you didn't like something, it likely wasn't meant for you and your 'criticism' is not wanted or helpful. Fandom is about community and lifting each other up, not about you shitting all over another person's work because you think your opinion matters.

"Rizzoli & Isles: Season 8" - a brilliant fanfic for everyone who wants Rizzles endgame!

Title of Fic: "Rizzoli & Isles: Season 8"

Author: SilenceintheLibrary13

Fandom/Pairing: "Rizzoli & Isles", Maura Isles and Jane Rizzoli ("Rizzles")

TW: /

Rating: M

Synopsis: This story is set as a continuation of the series, but with the ending we all hoped for with every fibre of our being and still didn't get! And the best thing is that we get to read about their month in Paris together - where they finally admit their true feelings for each other and enjoy a romantic first vacation as a couple. Yay!

The characters are written really well here and while it's not a slow burn, their development as a romantic couple is depicted in a very convincing way. The plot itself needs to be praised, too: We get some sexy times, but also heartfelt conversation and a glimpse into their domestic life together, yet the author did not shy away from adding some good ol' suspense: When Maura and Jane decide to get married, they receive threatening anonymous messages to call the event off! Someone definitely does not want to grant them their well-deserved "Happily ever after" but who could that mystery person be? Someone holding a grudge against those two for professional or personal reasons?

This storyline has everything a really good fanfiction needs and was Winner of the 2018 Rizzles Award of Distinction for Best Canon Storyline!

It is one of those fanfics you can read again and again when you are in the mood for something that is light but not shallow, romantic but not *too* dramatic, neither slow-burn nor sloppily done. It's one of the stories to go back to again and again because of its perfect combo of romance, fluff, smu*t, suspense and character development.

We all know the Zoomies, but there's also the Cuddles, which is that time when your cat is, for a very specific time, extremely needy and absolutely has to get their fuzzy little head right up in your face and purr at top volume

And often five minutes later they're done and not interested in any more affection

But don't you dare try to get anything done while they have to be cuddled

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Maya Angelou, from Letter to My Daughter

[Text ID: I am convinced that most people do not grow up. We find parking spaces and honor our credit cards. We marry and dare to have children and call that growing up. I think what we do is mostly grow old. We carry accumulation of years in our bodies and on our faces, but generally our real selves, the children inside, are still innocent and shy as magnolias. We may act sophisticated and worldly but I believe we feel safest when we go inside ourselves and find home, a place where we belong and maybe the only place we really do.]
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the grief of loss and separation vs. the blessings behind every human interaction that filled us with love and hope