for the @guardian review

now listen to me kirby, i am talking directly into your ear now. i need you to do me a favor. you will do this for me. i need you to go to gamestop, and i need you to ask that bastard magolor if they have kirby super star on the snes. if you come back with kirby’s dream land 3 youll be in big trouble kirby. you will never see the light of day.

The Stages of Grief

Hi everybody.

@vgstims sent me this crying statue gif this morning and it hit me hard. I suddenly realized that I was in grief, dealing with the death of Tumblr as I knew it for over 4 years.

I never realized just how powerful an online community can be and to see it die is very tough to experience.

I just thought I’d share this with my followers, which believe it or not, is a little short of 50,000 on Tumblr, at 49,516.

The goal of my blog, as a fighter, was to bring the fight gym to Tumblr, to make it as real as possible for my followers, to have them experience virtually what a fight gym would feel like and what Manliness means.

I hope that I did that for all of of you!

As I said previously, I’ll continue to post until Tumblr takes me down, fight to the end!

Always seek Manliness!

WarriorMale

Honestly, the whole Tumblr flagging debacle reminds me of nothing so much as the official White Wolf forums back in the 1990s, whose automatic profanity filters were so overzealous that they ended up censoring terminology from some of their own games.

(For the uninitiated, the starkest example was probably the filter that automatically converted “ass” to “butt”, including when the string A-S-S appeared as part of another word. The trouble is that White Wolf’s most popular game, Vampire: The Masquerade, included in its lore a prominent vampire clan called the Assamites, who stock-in-trade was assassination. Under the forum’s profanity filter, players were reduced to referring to them as the Buttamites, and their missions as – you guessed it – buttbuttinations.)

A clbuttic mistake.

i think anyone who can look at the animal crossing art style and get an erection might be a serial killer?

the chocolate fountain bird was the funniest thing that will ever happen on tumblr. people spent so much time arguing over whether or not the gifs were real and we got that CLASSIC copypasta out of it but the ultimate punchline was that no one recognized the gifs for days because they were from adam sandler’s jack and jill (which had just come out) and no one fucking saw that movie

hi everyone, accidentally made something terrible again, sorry

as it turns out when you find as many user created skeleton models as possible on the steam workshop and rig them all up at the same time it does not result in an accurate and complete human skeleton

A cautionary tale Not To Experiment with Skeletons.

read the full comic!

i have watched approximately 54535624664534 of these so here is my Ode to Hallmark Christmas Movies

SNIRBY

let me double check that ive- ive gotten everything

The Time Break

i told you that i would explain the time break didn’t i? and im gonna explain it right now

why does no one understand the time break except for Me?

why am I the only scholar in time break studies?

Hyrule Warriors Definitive Edition happens outside the timeline entirely Similarly to Breath of the Wild. it exists in all of the timelines Because Ganondorf’s soul gets split into multiple pieces that go into different timelines andagain thats in the Story itself

link F-Figures Out that there’s multiple timelines in this time okay and then “He Defeats The Thing” and he goes into existential crisis mode just like over here and like over here and like over there

but what does he do when he knows that all these timelines exist? he goes and he plays Super Smash Brothers with all of his friends in every single timelineThats how Super Smash Brothers Ultimate can exist because it’s 

everyone

All The Time

EVERYWHERE

the time break still doesn’t fit in. its still by itself over here rightok the time break doesn’t have a space. link knows about every timeline and hes done hanging out with his friends here in the time break. so What Does He Do? he decides to settle down. get a real job. and what can he do better than anyone else? thats right he knows every location in every timeline im talking

location. location. location.

he buys up every land. he consolidates every timeline and pushes it all into one space

dundun dun DunDunDun

LEGEND OF ZELDA MONOPOLY. THE MOST IMPORTANT LEGEND OF ZELDA GAME. OF ALL TIME. THE ONE THAT MAKES BREATH OF THE WILD MAKE SENSE.

TAKE FUCKING NOTES. I JUST SAVED YOUR ASS

THIS IS THE PIN. THAT HOLDS THE ENTIRE ZELDA TIMELINE TOGETHER.

YOU MADE ME USE MONOPOLY

you’ll never see it coming

so you know how deep learning & neural network “AI training” is like, “here’s a task, and by trying billions of times the computer will eventually find the best way to achieve that task” ?

Someone is compiling a document of every time an AI ended up achieving the programmed goal in unintended ways, instead of what was actually meant, and it’s an amazing read. (you can also submit your own examples)

Just want to come back to this post and add this amazing example as well

Heres an AI that was supposed to learn how to walk using six legs. 

After many failed attempts. It decided it was easier to walk upside down

scene before movie climax:

protagonist: So who’s with me?

*5 seconds of silence*

the stoic one: *looks up* im in

4 people one after the other: me to

*after everyone else has joined we see The Edgy One standing in the back*

*2 more seconds of silence*

The Edgy One: *chortles* we’re all gonna die… what the hell, im in

My favorite movie.

Fun fact: This scene is from an art project called Shrek Retold, in which the movie Shrek was re-created, scene by scene, by over 200 artists of all varying levels of talent, and it’s freely available on youtube.

Have fun wasting 1,5 hours of your life.

I was listening to mbmbam (410) and justin did this beautiful Munch Squad Solo so you know I had to try to transcribe it 🎸🎸🍔🍔

ok but if Dio ate one of Tonio’s dishes you think pearl jam would be able to fix Dio’s shitty attitude?

i’m crying

That is not funny That is not cute It is animal abuse BIRDS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO EAT CHOCOLATE BIRDS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE COATED IN CHOCOLATE Why the fuck do you think birds who get coated in oil die? It’s for the same goddamn reason. You idiots can have all the chuckles you want over the fact that that poor animal is “living the dream” but I hope you also know that it probably died from that. And if you still find it funny then I genuinely do not want to associate with you and can only wish upon you the most the most painful and awful death imaginable.

I just want to point out that no one is forcing that bird into the chocolate no one pulled the damn thing in Inf act, it fully appears to be waddling into the foundain by its damn self Calm the hell down chocolate is not the same thing as chocolate Its just a bird making a mistake and its fucking funny It’s not animal cruelty unless someone was holding that bird at gunpoint fucking christ

Listen here cum-slut, I bet you 5 million dollars that you don’t own a bird. But guess what? I own 7. And I can tell you right now that a bird would never just walk into something like a chocolate fountain. They’ll rarely walk directly into water. But say that your idiotic theory is correct. Say it did actually walk into it. That animal still probably died. Is that still funny to you? Do you still get your kicks out of knowing that that bird was probably terrified and opening its mouth to scream in that last panel? And if you say yes then you seriously disgust me as a human being.

God bless the people in the notes who think this is an actual criticism of DuckTales (2017).