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Mrs. All American

@diana-americana

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List of some of the things Niall will have done by 2025

  • Gone Solo
  • Had received several grammys
  • Has done countless more charity events
  • Cured cancer
  • solved world hunger
  • Got One Direction to do another album
  • Has a kid
  • Got married
  • Become president of the United States of America even though hes not a American citizen
  • Becomes a documentary filmmaker
  • Goes pro in Golf
  • Sold out Stadium tours without the name One Direction
  • Creates a Guitar company
  • Goes brunette
  • Builds homes for families in need
  • Becomes a best selling author
  • Becomes a model

and ya’ll will still be like

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thexfiles

you know when you feel the exact moment your mood drops. like that One Second where you’re like Ah Here We Go Again

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List of some of the things Niall will have done by 2025

  • Gone Solo
  • Had received several grammys
  • Has done countless more charity events
  • Cured cancer
  • solved world hunger
  • Got One Direction to do another album
  • Has a kid
  • Got married
  • Become president of the United States of America even though hes not a American citizen
  • Becomes a documentary filmmaker
  • Goes pro in Golf
  • Sold out Stadium tours without the name One Direction
  • Creates a Guitar company
  • Goes brunette
  • Builds homes for families in need
  • Becomes a best selling author
  • Becomes a model

and ya’ll will still be like

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Guide to Shoplifting!

Hey, here for another guide to making sure you have a good haul next time you want to do some lifting!

STEP ONE: pick a store

STEP TWO: pick out whatever you want

STEP THREE: check to see if there’s any employees around

STEP FOUR: make sure you have everything you want

STEP FIVE: bring it to the check-out line

STEP SIX: strike up casual conversation with employee

STEP SEVEN: actually fucking pay for your shit instead of shoplifting

STEP EIGHT: tell the employee to have a wonderful day

STEP NINE: leave the store with your wonderful new item(s)

STEP TEN: don’t shoplift in the future either since you could get employees in serious trouble or even fired

Pro-tip! Always remember, if you think that there is absolutely nothing wrong with shoplifting and that it won’t cause any problems for employees, especially when it comes to stealing $1,000+ in goods from a store, you’re full of shit!

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The best way to shoplift

1. Obviously, get everything you want together. 2. Go to the dressing room and try it on if you need. 3. Take what you want. 4. Go to the register. 5. Smile at the cashier. 6. PAY FOR YOUR SHIT YOU ASS

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Reblog if you're anti-shoplifting

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poppycola

Jean and shoplifting.

Okay here’s a story for you guys:

So I used to work at this toy store, and I had a coworker, let’s call her Jean. Jean was around 67 and she was working there because it was something to do, and she was a great person, gave her money to charity, bought lunch for people for people who didn’t have any, offered to buy stuff for families who couldn’t afford it, the works. The thing is, she worked in the front-ish where all the little $3-5 toys were and I was a cashier, and a lot of people would lift from her section. A LOT. The toys were small and easy to hide, and the kids (I’m pretty sure it was always kids, after all, an adult has the decency not to steal, right?) would just take them while she wasn’t looking and run to their parents.

Well, one day I’m off and Jean is working but I’m there anyway because I’m looking at Pokemon cards and I get an employee discount, and I see a group of four kids (three girls, one boy) around 14-15 come on and head straight to Jean’s section. Two of them have purses, but given their age and the fact that I also have one I don’t think anything of it. Not five minutes later they run out the door, and our manager runs out of her office, yelling for someone to stop them.

Apparently those kids had stuffed $50 worth of toys in their purses and Jean had let them go. That wouldn’t have warranted much, except apparently the kids had done it before and Jean hadn’t caught them any other time either. So our manager called Jean into her office, and fired her on the spot. Maybe she thought Jean was in on it. I don’t know.

That’s what happens when you steal stuff. It’s not the CEO, or the Manager who gets in trouble, it’s the employee making minimum wage trying to feed her grandkids who gets in trouble. Next time you go lift, I want you to find an employee, and talk to them. Because that’s who you’re stealing from.

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seeing the shoplifting community get caught

seeing the shoplifting community get butthurt about being caught

watching the shoplifting community scramble around trying to justify and/or hide themselves

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10kbeez

For the record

People stealing food/ necessities because they need to survive in our shithole of a government: Zero judgment, I’m incredibly sorry you’re in this situation, do what you need to do to survive. People stealing designer clothes and makeup because you don’t want to pay for it and you “enjoy the rush”: Absolute assholes, grow the fuck up and stop pretending what you’re doing is a “hobby”.

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Tips for Shoplifting

1. Don’t shoplift

2. If you have already shoplifted, return to the store and pay for what you took.

3. Most importantly, DON’T FUCKING SHOPLIFT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Things i will never understand about tumblr

  • Shipping two violently straight dudes
  • Believing everything they see on here
  • Protecting known a sexual predator
  • Thinking villains will be respectful of your gender identity
  • THE FUCKING SHOPLIFTING FANDOM
  • DEAR GOD AND THE SERIAL KILLER FANDOM
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CRUNCHWRAPSUPREME

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what she says: i'm fine
what she means: i ate so much fucking shit on the fourth of july. i said i wouldn't, but then i did and i totally fucked up my diet and now i'm paying for it by working out in the hundred fucking degree weather. i hate my fucking life. i hate myself so much. why the FUCK DID I DO THAT? AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHH-HAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! WORK BITCH!
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me, on a date: what are your thoughts on zoobes?
them: I think that they're pretty childish and stupid and I don't see their poi-
me, shoving breadsticks into my purse: sorry but I have to go home right now immediately
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im having fun with zoobe

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Explained: Zoobe meme