I’ve been inactive for a while and now I’ve decided this ain’t gonna be just a pro Ana account. Imma just use it as a coping account?
#ghostemane #ed #proana #ghostie #blackmage

I’ve been inactive for a while and now I’ve decided this ain’t gonna be just a pro Ana account. Imma just use it as a coping account?
#ghostemane #ed #proana #ghostie #blackmage
I gave you everything and it still wasn't enough. It was never enough. You made me feel like I was nothing. Made me believe that I was difficult to love, and like a fool I kept trying. I kept trying until it became too much. I got in so deep that I forgot who i was. I knew it was toxic, I knew it wasn't right. But no matter how bad things got, I couldn't help but try. I told myself it would be different this time. I just couldn't give up. Constantly battling whether this is love or lust, because if it is love then why was this all messed up. I would treat myself like nothing yet to you, I gave so much. And then you go and break my heart, tell me that your sorry and that this is a fresh start. And like a fool I'd wait. Wait for the day you make another mistake. A part of me wants to speak up but I hesitate. It's like you're controlling me. You've affected my brain. How do I escape when you've become a part of my DNA. Even when you're gone, I'm still the one left with all the pain. He said he's sorry. He told me he didn't mean it and that he's going to change. And I choose to believe him when he says he won't hurt me again. I'm not expecting you to understand, go ahead, judge me. But if I lose him, I'll have nobody. Do you get that? Who wants to live a life withered and empty. I need him just as much as he needs me and in some sick twisted way he completes me. That's why it works, we just keep going until one of us inevitably gets hurt. So yeah I choose to stay. Go ahead and call me weak, I'm not expecting you to understand, just know that leaving someone is not that easy. He's gone into my mind and without him I'm paralyzed. Every weaken moment I cry . I've gotten used to it. It doesn't hurt so much anymore . I've become numb to it. I've become sore and in some sick twisted way, he's my only cure. What can I say , I'm incredibly flawed. Love isn't like what you see on tv. This is what it's like. This is my reality. It's not as magical as they portray it in a Disney movie. It's alot of pain and sacrifice. You just keep on picking until you bleed.
this post aims to educate on how much protein a person needs, why it’s important to have enough, what low-calorie foods to eat for protein, and a few simple recipes for each food.
the average person needs a minimum of .8 grams of protein per kg of weight (or .36 grams of protein per pound) so as not to have a protein deficiency.
signs of protein deficiency include:
and since the vast majority of people on here do not seem to be getting their protein (myself included), here are some high-protein, low-calorie foods (with a recipe to make it!)
VEGAN:
🥕 in 1 cup of unshelled soybeans, there is: 107 calories, 10 grams of protein, 8 grams of fiber, 13 milligrams of sodium, and 2 grams of fat to cook: boil until the soybean pods start to float, drain, then add salt (107 calories)
🥕 in 6 ounces of firm tofu, there is: 140 calories, 16 grams of protein, 0 grams of fiber, 0 grams of sodium, and 8 grams of fat to cook: slice into small cubes and stir-fry with spray-oil, soy sauce, and vegetables (broccoli and carrots work good and are both super low-cal! the whole meal is 200 calories if you use 1 cup of each vegetable)
VEGETARIAN:
🧀 in 4 egg whites, there is: 68 calories, 14 grams of protein, 0 grams of fiber, 219 milligrams of sodium, and 0 grams of fat to cook: preheat small pan with a little spray oil. separate the egg whites and yolks with your fingers, then discard the yolks (or use for someone else’s meal). cook the egg whites on medium heat until firm, scrambling occasionally. add salt and pepper to taste, and eat on 1 slice of bread (158 calories with a 90 calorie slice of whole wheat bread)
🧀 in 1 cup of skim milk, there is: 90 calories, 8 grams of protein, 0 grams of fiber, 130 milligrams of sodium, and 0 grams of fat to cook: eat with 1 cup of plain cheerios and 1 packet of sugar substitute for a 190 calorie breakfast!
🧀 in 5.3 ounces of low-fat greek yogurt, there is: 150 calories, 12 grams of protein, 0 grams of fiber, 60 milligrams of sodium, and 4.5 grams of fat to cook: put plain yogurt in a bowl with ½ cup of any berry and one packet of sugar substitute. stir and enjoy (200 calories or less)
CARNIVORE:
🍖 in 4 ounces of baked chicken breast (boneless and skinless), there is: 110 calories, 23 grams of protein, 0 grams of fiber, 180 milligrams of sodium, and 3 grams of fat to cook: preheat oven to 190C/375F. spray baking pan with spray oil. rub chicken with salt, pepper, and garlic powder. put the chicken in the pan and cover with a piece of tin foil. bake for 40 minutes (110 calories)
🍖 in 3 ounces of yellowfin tuna canned in water, there is: 99 calories, 22 grams of protein, 0 grams of fiber, 288 milligrams of sodium, and 1 gram of fat to cook: drain can, then add low-fat greek yogurt, lemon juice, low-fat mayo, apples, pickle juice, or cucumber (there’s a million different things you can add, so experiment! 150 calories or less)
Savory:
- 1 slice of rye bread with 2 tablespoons of tomato salsa
- 35 g (¼ c) light soft cheese with celery
- 15 g (1/8 c) air popped popcorn
- 1 oatcake
- 1 light cheese triangle, light babybel, or ¼ light mozzeralla ball
- 1 miso soup sachet
- 250 ml. low sodium tomato juice
- 10 olives, in brine not oil
- 1 dill pickle
- 15 cherry tomatos
Sweet:
- 1 small apple
- 80 g (¾) of blueberries
- 1 medium orange
- 1 kiwi
- 200 g (2 c) melon cubes
- 150 g (1 ½ c) strawberries
- 10 cherries
- 17 grapes
- ½ grapefruit
I am afraid. This is the first time that i’ve admitted it because i was always told how brave i am, but i am NOT. I lost it , i’m being honest because i was not before, but i am afraid to live but i’m also afraid to die. i don’t want to be here but i have nowhere else to go. The reason i developed an ed is because it loved me when nobody else did, it was my family when i didn’t have any who cared about me enough to make em see that there are reasons to live, i know that the main person who effected my life is probably reading this, i hope you know that i still cry because of you, you fuck. You broke my ego. I tore stars from my veins for you, you forced me to do things i didn’t want to do. Your lips still taste like vomit to me . You made me prepare myself for you to leave and walk out of my life, i still have nightmares about you, almost a whole year after you took the light out my life away i still think of you and i disgust myself because sometimes i miss you, actually i miss myself, not you . I really hate you for what you did to me . You still disgust me, you sick fuck. I prepared myself to be broken and hurt but here i am, crumpled on the bathroom floor, sick to the stomach. I still wonder what i could do to make you stay and that is why i shred my arms. Because of YOU. I lost the will to fight because of YOU.
● your parents called you fat
● your brother/sister called you fat
● your friends called you fat
● you called yourself fat
● a stranger called you fat
Im gonna look at this fucking thinspirational perfect thinspo every morning every fucking night to remind me that going from 126 to 105 (which is kinda my goal) worths and looks amazing and probably is gonna save my life too!!
reblogging for me
things i need u to please know right now:
The only time that you would call
Was just to tell me it's my fault
I let you cry, I let you worry.
I let you yell, I let you hurt me. I gave you everything you needed And now you're gone.
•cold hands 24/7
•wearing vest tops under anything to try and stay warm
•jeans gaping at the back
•dresses being too loose and having to alter them
•discoloured nails, and painting them to hide it
• use a shit ton of conditioner to try and keep your hair ‘healthy’
•fasting for ages, then bingeing on stupid shit
• trying way to hard in gym class, just trying to burn more calories
•hating it when your friends go out to eat
•sleepovers are hell, everyone’s eating constantly
•baking and cooking nonstop, but none of the food makes it into your mouth
•making up allergies so you can avoid more foods
•constantly chewing gum
•why are diet sodas so expensive?
•having to refill your water bottle constantly
•not knowing if it’s stomach cramps from hunger or if your period has come back..
•never losing that little pudge of tummy
•hair bands being loose around your wrists
•braclets just slide off
•necklaces accent the collarbones
•all you can see in any selfie is your collarbones
•only being able to think ‘she’s fat’ ‘she’s tiny’ around other girls
•constantly comparing yourself
•trying to find an outfit that doesn’t make you look to fat
•wearing baggy jumpers to hide the bones
•working out constantly
•non stop bruises
•fluffy socks are life because of chilly feet
•struggling to sleep because you are so cold
•chugging water and feeling the coldness in your stomach
•not having the energy to lift your arms to shampoo your hair
•having to shave so much because of all the extra hair
•butt and boobs are first to go
(I’m aware some of these aren’t about Ed’s, but everyone is supposed to take their own interpretation from lyrics, that’s what makes songs so special)
(This song kinda feels like a fuck you to girls with ED’s so maybe not the best song to listen to if you’re struggling)
(This song is more about OCD but because of how obsessive you can get with ED’s it works)
Ok, these songs don’t talk about eating, but they hold a place in my heart, and really represent me and my ED. They also remind me of when I was thinner, and when my ED was in its “best” moments, I’m sure a lot of you understand that.
•Breathe Me - Sia
•Think I’m Sick - Icon For Hire
•Get Well - Icon For Hire
•Control - Halsey
•Soap - Melanie Martinez
•Avalanche - Bring Me The Horizon
Guess I should add this
I personally don’t like this song but y’all might
•Ugly - Nicole Dollanganger
You know what the hardest part of weight loss is to me?
If you want to lose weight, you can’t listen to your body.
When it comes to thirst, or safety, or big life decisions, listening to your body usually points you in the right direction.
But weight loss is different. That’s because we evolved to seek out food and weight gain. Thousands of years ago, that worked! We needed to be hungry and want to eat and get bigger, because we didn’t know when our next meal would be. But that doesn’t work in modern life.
Now food is everywhere and weight gain is easy. So to become thin we have to ignore our most basic urges. And that only multiplies once we’ve been overweight, because our metabolism and neurological makeup adjusts to that new lifestyle.
So here I am, trying to listen to my body and drink when I’m thirsty, or avoid a person when I have a bad gut feeling about them, or pick a new job when I hate my current one in the depths of my heart. But when I’m hungry, I have to make a conscious decision to ignore that feeling. Every day I’m living a life of contradictions.
It makes me feel powerful in that I know I’m conquering evolution every time I see the number on the scale drop. But it’s also exhausting. Absolutely, incredibly, unbelievably, exhausting.
° It’s a known fact you’ll always be cold. But not how cold. I can take a hot shower and lie under two blankets and still be cold to the bone.
° You’ll get weak. I’ve always been weak in my arms but right now I can’t even carry a chair without my muscles aching.
° My back hurts. All the time. My knees do too, I feel like I’ve aged 4 years in the span of 1.
° Don’t listen to sweetspo. You won’t look in the mirror at your goal weight and be skinny. You just won’t see it. I’ve lost 5kg and don’t see a difference.
° You won’t be proud when someone worries about your food. You will be defensive and angry and grumpy. You don’t want them to know.
° You’ll feel guilty. About eating too much and doing too little. But most of all keeping a huge secret from anyone who cares about you.
° You can’t concentrate on anything else than food.
° Are you depressed and anxious??? Great! It’ll increase.
° It won’t ever be enough.
° I can’t stop. I can’t.
° You’ll freak out about fun things. About normal things. Christmas, eating dinner with friends, going out.
° Please get help if you can. Please get out while you can. This is not a friend of yours.