Okay so I did some research, very basic research, on the user base of tumblr and how many of us there are.
There are at least 300 million unique visitors worldwide on this site. Over 500 million blogs.
Listen. Tumblr is $30 million in debt. This is Super easy for us to solve.
If each user gifts one blog crabs, which costs slightly over $3, that would be roughly $600 million at least. Far more than enough to get Tumblr out of the red zone.
If we want tumblr to stay afloat and not change something as integral about their operating system, we need to show them they can be profitable without reducing themselves to common social media sites. What we have here is special. It is different. We are the social media site people run to when theirs collapses and for good reason.
If we want this to work, we have to make it work. We can even make it into a game. Just how long can we outlast the other social media sites?
Yes that’s exactly what I’m saying.
It needs to be a holiday. Pick a date a few weeks from now, and just make it Crab Day. Maybe a Saturday as a lot of people are paid on Fridays. Just in case this post becomes more popular than any I've had before, lets set the date as the last Saturday in July (which for us in 2023 will be July 29th.)
On July 29th, gift as many crabs as you can without breaking the bank. Post crab memes if you cannot afford a crab.
Tumblr can pull this off. Tumblr likes doing things like this.
Yes... yes, it sounds ridiculous... but this site is ridiculous...
wow i cant believe adhd doof is canon
adhdoof
anonamous-anomaly
That is the face of a Platypus desperately wishing he had some Adderall.
“Yeah ! Back on topic, baby !” i’m losing my shit
One bot
two bot
Old bot, new bot
girlbots tumbl quite a lot!
I do not want your bots of spam. I do not want them, Sam I Am.
Don’t show your stolen human face
within my quirky online space.
I will not let you use my friends
to network for your spammy ends.
I do not want to see your chest.
In fact what I would like the best
is for you all to
GO
AWAY.
Scram. Git. Begone. Just do not stay.
At least, at risk of sounding bitter,
Change up your hellsite—go try Twitter!
Agdgsgsgsg I’m LIVING for this Reef2Reef thread. This guy was worried about his urchins getting sunburnt so he made them little hats
IT GETS BETTER
In the wild these urchins will in fact carry a small rock or shell exactly on top like this and im so happy there's people taking advantage of that and who care about their urchins as pets.
i visited an aquarium at some point, and our tour guide told that when the staff had a party, they put a little decorative plastic hat from a booze bottle into the sea urching tank, and just left it there because the sea urchins liked it, and kept taking turns in wearing it.
Discovering that sea urchins wearing hats is a thing in this world means so much to me rn
As a species, humans have a lot of faults but our relentless desire to put tiny hats on animals is not one of them.
I'll never get tired of photos of hats on sea urchins
cumpriest
so funny to me when white american christians are like “ooh i incorporate my religious trauma into my art and thats why i draw these stained glass gothic church gold multi eyed reneissance sculpture angels agnus dei” like i know your protestant southern california ass didnt have any of that. go make some art about this
Damn way to read the assignment and go above and beyond.
the bleakness and sanitized feel of most American protestant churches really is an underused medium.
i will never understand the insane takes against having games be more accessible
“does every game NEED to be accessible to disabled people? 🤨” yeah, actually
also the pissing and shitting over difficulty settings. just play the game on the normal difficulty dumbass it’s not for you
Same with stuff like screen shake, particle effects, flashing/lightning effects: “But the game would look terrible without them!”
Then Just.... Don’t turn them off then, dickface...
Meanwhile, *having the option to turn them off* would greatly increase the number of people able to play the game.
also imagine adding graphic settings for colorblindness, “this game would look like shit” yea it’s not for your healthy eyes dumbass don’t turn it on
i love it when people end their dumbass points with a snappy one-liner that is technically true but in the complete opposite direction they intended
"i only concussed myself on a bike once and it wasn't even as bad as the time i walked directly into a metal pole" is not the supporting argument you seem to think it is
girl that concussion did a lot more damage than you realize lmao
I have been trying to raise 400 for over a month now so that I can attend drivers ed. I am literally stuck in a very toxic household, barely able to leave the house dealing with constant anxiety and depression. I have been out of work for six months and no one will hire me bc I don’t have reliable transportation. I have overheard certain family members calling me out my name, calling me a burden every time that I have to be driven anywhere especially back to school since it’s 2 hours away and I’m just tired of it. I know that I won’t be able to afford a car anytime soon, but this is just one step forward to independence and honestly I just need to get out even if it’s just for a few days out of the week. I already missed the last deadline and lost my deposit and the next deadline is July 22nd. I’m embarrassed to even write this but I have 0 dollars at the moment after paying bills and buying food. Anything helps! Feel free to keep scrolling, I am not in any way forcing anyone to donate. At the very least reblog bc it goes a long way! <3
20/400 <3
update as of 6/28: 99/400! This is the last class I can take before I have to go back to school so pls keep going! 🙏🏾
update as of 6/30: still at 196/400! Almost halfway! Thanks so much for keeping this post going and for donating! Please keep going! 🙏🏾
this is the funniest ad ive ever seen. the mobile app company was like huh ppl really hate the ads we run of someone doing the worst possible job at our game so what if we just sort of added a representation of their hatred into our ad. and didn’t change anything else. peace and love please play our shitty game
hey. don’t say that <3
HEY <3 DONT SAY THAT <333
if anyone needs me i'll be frothing at the mouth thinking about the origin of language and interspecies communication. happy wednesday.
how did we learn this? who taught us this? is it coincidental? is it observational? is it that something in the source of these sixteen languages stems from the same animal instinct that causes each of these species to call out to their own kind? I Am Going To Lose It.
take some time to notice your vision. see how easily you detect motion. focus on something in your peripheral (without moving your eyes to it). see how it works. look at your hands. pick something up with your fingers. appreciate how ridiculously specialized they are in fine motor skills (even if your personal motor skills are lackluster). think about how you have a body built to be an apex predator through use of tools. think about how the brain of your kind has created a digital hivemind uniting the whole world. now look back at the screen. look at the tab where you are in an argument about cartoons on tumblr. close the tab. open a new tab. google “tribute to anomalocaris”. watch the video that comes up. leave a like. subscribe even though the channel has been inactive for 8 years. you will need it in the coming times
snakegay
Diversity win! The mercenary assassinating you for union organization is bisexual!
OK. OKAY. YOU GUYS.
I am LOVING the fucking chocolate guy’s netflix show! It’s FANTASTIC! Anf hold on to your fucking boots y’all cause it’s actually not what I was expecting at all!
Do you miss the gentleness of the Great British Bake-Off? THIS SHOW IS SO KIND AND GENTLE! For fuck’s sake, NO ONE GETS KICKED OFF! No. No, Listen to this! When they lose the first challenge (a pastry one), the punishment is… They get private lessons with Amaury to help improve what brought their scores down instead of competing in the second chocolate challenge.
When the one black lady contestant messed up the first challenge I was super bummed and like, OF COURSE. But NO. She got lessons! She struggled! she worked hard! and she won a later challenge! GROWTH MY DUDES! They are there TO LEARN and GROW and Maybe Win a Big Prize!
They ALL get to stay and keep doing their best! and at the end the one who did the best overall is the one who gets the money prize!
Look at this lovely line up! they make COOL LOOKING FANCY THINGS! Amaury tells us how he does some of the fancy things he does! They OFFER TO HELP EACH OTHER WHEN THEY FINISH EARLY AND GET PROPS FOR THAT! (not taunted for not using their own time better). The set up even kinda makes the one who is like, I’m in it to win it, is the villain and doing bad. The rest who are like, I’m here to learn and grow and maybe make friends! AUGH YOU GUYS!
Amaury is soft spoken and kind, and has a pretty voice and a pretty smile and that’s nice to watch too. The chefs are talented and artistic and they actually give the THE TIME to make nice things! It’s not “Wham out some half-assed garbage in 2 hours so we can shotgun the production and laugh at your garbage” like most cooking shows nowadays. NO! 14 hour challenges! They’re still hard, but they get to actually make cool stuff! fancy stuff! Stuff I want to look at and cheer for them!
The episodes average 38 min and aren’t a huge time commitment, the first episode being the longest one, and there are only 8 total so it’s not like you have to really get in for the long haul. \
WATCH IT! Pump it! we need more cooking shows like this and less that are sad and mean!