Reblog if you need this energy

decode your teen's texts

lmao: lenin, mao, and others

brb: bringing rad bolsheviks

kmrc: karl marx was really cool

ittiu: i think trotsky is underrated 

rtcm: reading the communist manifesto 

pilsalbway: personally i liked stalin better, what about you?

I don’t know if you guys know this or not but the girl and the sailor didn’t even know each other, the sailor was drunk and sexually assaulted her in the street and they got off the boat. history lesson. boom.

UM

NO

THAT’S NOT WHAT HAPPENED

Upon hearing the news that the war was over, everyone was celebrating in the streets. The sailor was overwhelmed with the joy of the moment and grabbed a nurse and kissed her before they parted ways. She didn’t see it as a sexual assault, she understood that everyone was celebrating. And it certainly wasn’t simply a drunken act.

Stop trying to ruin this picture. It captures the joy of the end of a really awful time. 

If I’m not mistaken, these two remain friends to this day. 

You aren’t mistaken, they visit each other and their families and exchange christmas cards.

And this is him now:

GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT PEOPLE. LORD

boom.

As it should be

I-M-P-E-A-C-H-M-E-N-T

This is so funny I’m going to pee

THIS IS THE NEW NATIONAL ANTHEM

is there a word for “i’m okay but it’s a fragile kind of okay so be gentle with me”? 

I nominate ‘I’m eggshell fine’. Currently whole but easily crushed again.

Concept: you’ve been married to your wife for 3 years. You wake up in your bed before she does, your nose cold but your body warm. Careful not to wake her, you get out of bed and your toes curl when your feet hit the cold floor. You brew a pot of coffee and take a cup, making sure to leave enough for her. You pull on a big sweater and walk out onto your deck, sitting in a big wood chair to look out over the forest. The leaves are orange and edged with frost. All is quiet as the sun rises over the trees. You hear the door opening behind you and your wife sits down next to you, wrapping the comforter from your bed around both of you shoulders. You sit there like that until the sun is well up and your coffee cups are empty.

Oh my god. This is it. I want this so badly.

What if it bites me and it dies?

that means you’re poisonous. jesus christ, nate, learn to read.

What if it bites itself and I die?

It’s voodoo.

What if it bites me and someone else dies?

That’s correlation, not causation.

what if we bite each other and neither of us die

that’s kinky

oh my god

this is still my favorite text post collaboration ever

Fun Psychology facts here!

i trust you completely but i cant get rid of this fear that you’ll leave me

i wonder if magic is real, but only in a really mundane way.

when i was little i could almost inerringly switch back to disney channel right as the ads ended when i was channel surfing.

maybe youve never accidentally crushed a ladybug underfoot. maybe your microwave popcorn never burns. maybe you can spin around lots and lots of times before you get dizzy.

is that magic??

honestly im not sure if these are magic or just small, invisible skills. im not sure which i like better.

My ankles never twist.  I’ve always been rather active, I did track for five years (all the running events), and one time while running I stepped in a hole, lost my shoe, and landed sprawling about five feet away.  I pulled my shoe on and kept running.

I have a coworker who somehow makes better coffee than everyone else even though the grounds come pre-measured and all you have to do is load them up and push a button.  I have a friend who has inch long nails that never break.  My brother can copy origami just by looking at the finished product and my mother can do the same with knots.  I knew a guy who never made an error when typing.

Maybe we all have little magics, the kind that you don’t realize you have.  Just tiny things that make your life slightly better but are completely unnoticed on the outside.

this is the cutest post i have ever read…

Nooo I’ve actually shared this theory before. Like my Dad is really lucky finding parking spaces. And I’ve never cracked my phone even though I drop it on the time and have an average case. Like what if everybody gets one trivial part of their life that they’re illogically lucky at?

hey uwu bloggers:  just write “quadruple u” instead, because it’s the same thing.  thanks

The Orion Nebula captured in visible and infrared light by NASA’s Spitzer Space Telescope

watch the stars with me

perk of dating me: i have no social life so we can hang out whenever it’s convenient for you

bada bing, babadook

@oddside