Kosher Food of Neopia Pt 2: Which Petpets Are Kosher?
hi everyone! i’m Zelle and one of my many curses and/or blessings is the habit of trying to figure out what fictional creatures are edible under Jewish Kosher law. i’ve previously tackled all 55 species of Neopet so just in time for Rosh Hashanah this weekend, let’s dig into petpets!
Number of edible Petpet species: 18
(61 if you consider “edible” Custard, Chocolate, Gingerbread, Jelly or Picnic Petpets inherently kosher)
As a quick refresher on what we’re working with, Petpets are pets for your Neopets. Petpets can also have pets, called Petpetpets (of course). are they commonly eaten? Oh, absolutely - maybe you’d like some Smoked Snorkle Cheese (”Only the freshest snorkles were used to make this cheese.”) or a Baked Intesteen. In addition, there are some petpets whose animal byproducts are eaten in Neopia, like flavoured Slorg Slimes.
So what items are all above board for my Jewish Neopet to consume? And, if my Jewish Neopet happens to be a Grarrl or Skeith (who can readily consume Petpets if they want), which of them are OK?
I will not be listing Petpets which are not kosher, as there are just too many of them. Remember that for a mammalian creature to be kosher, it must chew cud and have completely split hooves. For a fish-like creature to be kosher, it must have visible fins and scales. For a bird-like creature to be kosher, it’s complicated, but usually ground-pecking behaviour and the right kind of feet are enough to be sure.
Fish-like Petpets are going to be the hardest - they’re so damn small, it’s hard to tell who has scales! I’ll do my best to exclude fish-like Petpets with the features of other, non-kosher sea creatures and to include those that really just seem to be a fish. Bear with me.
In addition, many Jewish people (and presumably Jewish Neopets) don’t mix meat and dairy in the same meal. That means you may want to watch out for such delights as the Cheesesteak Pizza, even if you can be sure the steak is from a kosher species of Neopet or Petpet. (What else could it possibly be from?)
How much did this suck?
i don’t want to talk about it. There are so many petpets. here’s some of the Petpets whose uncertain Kosher status will haunt me forever:
Without further ado, here are all the Petpets i’m ready to declare kosher:
