“God Elisabeth,
I’ve been doomed since the moment I watched you smack a fiend off my carriage with a crowbar.”
-Sorcery of Thorns, Margaret Rogerson
I finished Sorcery of Thorns and I just couldn’t stop thinking about twelve year old Nathaniel summoning Silas for the first time.
buenos días tumblr! for the low low price of 2 dollars, i will ruin your morning :)
not-a-swarm-of-bees
For the price of 3 dollars will you ruin another person’s life for me?
she sounds so cool I hope she leaves him and has a great life with someone who appreciates her
queen shit
I am pleased to know they broke up tonight
Jason, to Piper: Your smile? It makes my day.
Percy, to Annabeth: Your happiness? I live for that.
Leo: Hotel? Trivago.
The Launch of the USS Detroit, or How Large Ships are Launched Into Water.
The guy who designed this, every time: oh god oh god oh god
“If this doesn’t come out to be the determinant, you are about to hear a blood-curdling scream.”
— Linear algebra professor
Show up uninvited! Invite yourself to the party! Be the belle of the ball! Make a scene. Get kicked out. Set fire to the lawn.
Be the final pam you wish to see in the world
galactixart
I couldn’t not do this.
YOU FIXED IT YOU FIXED THE MEME
Percy Jackson: What doesn’t kill me should run, because I’m fucking pissed
mood
big-foot-licker
Mood
Mood
voids-grip
Mood
maddi-hd
Mood
pins-shitposts
Are you guys ok
yourelost-itsokay
no
Anonymous asked:
Gaud, my head hurts.
that’s what happens if you wear it for too long
ok now… how do we take it off?
it unscrews to the left
everytime I stay at a hotel I take a bite out of the soap bar to confuse the cleaning staff
hey op real quick what the Actual fuck
Hey op you do realize that by actually biting a chunk of fucking soap you are in fact the one losing
‘What kind of overalls does Mario wear?’
thenimbus
Yep, I laughed out loud
dendropsyche
I love the “oh no” like he fucking knows he’s going to hear a shitty ass joke
supremewhitegirl
this is the stupidest fucking joke in the world but i laugh every fucking time without fail