You telling me that Jack Black would not be 1000% down to be kidnapped by the muppets for a shenanigan, or possible a hijink?

Mr. The Frog still sends me more than “we all agreed a celebrity is not a people”

Bulbasaur was never the same after that day 🐉

Omg omg I got a bulbasaur at build a bear and I was kinda embarrassed about buying it for myself and stuff but there weren’t any other kids in the store or shoppers for that matter and the girl helping me said she was glad to here it was for me as she collects some plushies and has her own bulbasaur.

Well she was almost done stuffing him and then I noticed that you can put scents in your bear and fucking love cotton candy and the girl basically car salesmen style sold me on the scent pad and asked where I wanted the scent to go

And I didn’t know where it should go but she herself being quite the plushie enthusiast was like “you’re gonna hug him a lot right? may I reccomend right here” and pointed to his forehead

So I was like “awe cute yeah that sounds good” (my bulbasaur is totally stuffed mind you and I even had her make him extra firm )

and then the girl rolls up her sleeves and was like “alright bulbasaur! Here we go! I apologize in advance but this is gonna look very inappropriate!”

And she fisted my super full bulbasaur all the way to her elbow saying sorry to him and to me over and over again. It took her several tries to get the scent pad in place since my bulbasaur was so stuffed and she looked like she was straining and saying “I don’t know why they didn’t think about this design more, so many parents are gonna complain about this one day, I know it”

So all in all this was the best build a bear experience I’ve had since I was a little kid and I love my fat, cotton candy scented, anally inclined bulbasaur to pieces

Every time I see this post I cant stop fucking laughing

Faces carved into the walls of the Paris Catacombs

Frenchmen be like “this pitch black cave full of skeletons is not scary enough, I must make it worse”

i turned down a threesome with 2 hot guys because i had to do a system update on my nintendo 3ds

i shouldve taken the threesome.

movies where someone hears an important message only once and retains all the details….

girl if that were me, we’d be fucked. I have to reread emails like 4 times.

if it were me having to repeat my dead father’s instructions on destroying the death star:

ass foto

make your own

u know whats wild. everyone on here like 20 and when i first joined everyone was like 14 15. u ask anybody n they been here for years. nobody new on here. staff locked the doors n were all Stuck Inside

Tag your current age and how old you were when you joined Tumblr

#can you imagine the poor lady who had an existential crisis over this tho#‘Dana. dana i don’t know the name#when I asked the name they just said to surprise them#dana what does that mean what do i do#who says that’

Compilation

More

obsessed with them

Throwback Thursday: It was 5 years ago when we were celebrating award season for The Shape Of Water, and I got to live my dream of being in an old musical dance number (dressed as an Amphibian Man, of course) with the amazing Sally Hawkins.

the iconic Day 15 japanese dub

leonardo was the turtle, da vinci was the man

to remember how many feet there are in a mile, u just gotta use 5 tomatoes

five to-mate-oes sounds like five, two, eight, 0 and there’s 5280 feet in a mile

To remember how many meters there are in a kilometre you just remember “1000” because the system of measurement in the rest of the world wasn’t invented by a drunk mathematician rolling dice.

hello i like you a lot, do you like me too? [ ] yes

[ ] no

ps. ignore the foul homunculus i brought into being to deliver this message, i am a little shy. this is the wizard from spanish class (you know the one)

*marks the paper yes without reading the ps. I am now dating your homunculus*

dear diary,

it fucking happened again.

the cheese always falls off the top shelf if i open the door too fast

this is truly a magnificent beautiful picture of cheese falling down

Its like cherry blossoms cascading from trees in the wind