I don’t really Go Here but u can always rely on this man to read a right wing politician’s outfit for filth

I mean. Just devastating 😭

This man has LETHAL comebacks. Idiots keep trying to get one over on him and he has never missed

Actually no I'm double reblogging this I found the one where he *calls a guy's tailor* to confirm his suit isn't actually bespoke

You cannot win in his arena. This isn't "if you come at the king you better not miss" this is "don't fight a shark in the water"

Throwing a toddler tantrum and handing the country back to a senile, deranged, fascist, revenge-riddled, theocratic Trump HELPS. NOBODY.

louder for the morons in the back who are still whining about both parties being the same

Not voting for the left because they're not Left Enough also does not make the party go more left. It makes them go more right. Because that's where the votes are.

Reblogging because for the love of Christ, I wish the “I’m not going to vote for Biden because he’s not pure/ far left/ whatever enough for me” crowd would remember what, EXACTLY, it would mean for there to be a second Trump presidency.

Assuming that any checks currently in place would stop someone who’s mindset is “I’m perfect and DESERVE to be president” from turning our country into the closest approximation of Russia he can get, is not only naive, it’s dangerously, determinedly ignorant.

I said this in 2016 and I said it in 2020 and I'll say it again:

If you don't like the fact that the leftmost candidate of the two major parties isn't left enough, the solution is neither to refuse to vote, nor to "send a message" by voting third party. Both result in an advantage to the rightmost candidate.

The solution is, vote for the guy that's not quite good enough, and then lean on him hard.

Biden has moved farther to the left than any president since Roosevelt. Yes. He's gotten more of our agenda done than Clinton or Obama. And there's many things he's tried to do that the right wingers in Congress or in the Supreme Court have stopped him from doing. He's also moved farther to the left than any president I know of when you look at his whole career; at one point he was Liberal Lite, "moderate", pro-corporation, etc... and it seems he learned from it. He changed. So we're dealing with a guy who is capable of moving left, has done so, and could be asked to go farther.

The other candidate literally wants to become a dictator, eliminate freedom of the press, and spend our tax dollars persecuting his "enemies."

Do I like the fact that Biden is supporting Israel militarily when they have caused such an enormous and horrible death toll in Gaza? No. But we have treaties with Israel and we can't easily break them. Meanwhile we have actually seen him call Netanyahu out. Including saying basically "You keep this up and no one will be your friend", implying that he is threatening to withdraw support. Trump, meanwhile, is cheerfully Islamophobic and would happily murder every single Palestinian. You care about Palestine, there is only one legitimate choice. I'm sorry, I know you want to believe there are multiple moral options you can take, but there is really only one. In the US's winner-take-all first-past-the-post no ranked choice system, the guy who gets 51% of the vote and the guy who gets 90% of the vote are exactly the same.

Look, we can win this. The right's abortion bans are wildly unpopular; many people will be voting to try to restore the right to control our own bodies. Republican support skews older, but in four years millennials didn't magically reach a point of comfortable status quo where they're likely to start voting Republican; instead Republicans have doubled down on the crazy. Anti-maskers and ant-vaxxers, who are likely Republicans, are much more likely to have died of COVID than the reality-based community on the left, since Biden won by 7 million votes 4 years ago.

But Trump will do everything in his power to cheat. We can't just win by 51%. We have to trounce him and as many Republicans at the ballot box as we can, because they have lost the plot. Even the best ones refuse to do anything to stop the spread of this evil-for-its-own-sake movement that wants queers, Jews, and Muslims dead, POC subservient, and women of all races securely under the thumb of men. We have to stop this movement by sending a message to politicians, "these are not winning ideologies. Embrace these ideologies because of the fanatic fringe, and you will lose." Most of them aren't true believers; they're pandering. The only way to stop the Republicans being pointlessly destructive is to make so many of them lose, the rest realize, shit, the grownups are back, we better start acting like politicians and not demagogues again.

And one of the best ways to do that is to make sure Biden wins by such a large margin even Trump can't cheat his way to victory. Because he's ready. He's promised, there will be violence if he loses. (There will also be violence if he wins, but it will be state violence against us. If he loses, there will be rioting white thugs in red states, but the federal government will still have both the power and the will to try to stop that.) He's going to pull every dirty trick in the book to win. The only way to stop him is to win overwhelmingly. Then we get four more years of relative safety, where if Clarence Thomas dies or gets arrested we get a young liberal judge in his place, and in that time, we can push the Democratic party farther to the left, because they'll know why they won. They'll know who voted for them, and why, and they'll move in that direction because they want to keep winning.

You cannot save Gaza by making sure Biden loses. That is actually the worst possible thing that could happen, in terms of anything any American could do. Netanyahu wants Trump to win because Trump will back him up no matter what he does to the Palestinians.

Voting is not about proving how moral you are and selecting the perfect candidate. Voting is about getting the best possible candidate out of what is usually a lackluster selection. But this time, the choice is, an old guy who's not as charismatic and shiny as we'd like and hasn't done as much as we want, vs, literally, a wanna be dictator with an agenda that's pure evil.

Im so sorry but this is the funniest fucking thing

six graders to their english language arts teacher

can't have shit in Baltimore

oh my goddd just like the prestige drama television series The Wire (2002-2008)

somehow this guy was the most considerate carjacker in all of Baltimore. did he pull a gun on me? yeah. but he let me keep my phone and my wallet, and when he was driving away he rolled down the window and yelled at me "REPORT YOUR CAR STOLEN!" (the cops were confused and laughed when I told them this)

I told my husband @beemovieerotica that's what great about Baltimore, the crime is streamlined here.

the youth today, they have no class. these zoomers don't understand social cues and good manners. it takes a real upstanding citizen to rob your car at gunpoint and then immediately yell at you how to resolve your current dilemma. that's called community building

the downside of having comprehensive insurance

(Source)

I love yokai so much

THIS IS IT, THE BEST CRYPTID

@ximen This amuses me and I hope it amuses you as well.

It does!

My favorite thing about the myth is that every possible angle for how it came about is excellent:

Actual Demigod Sparrow Eats Emperor’s Breakfast: Awesome.

Regular Sparrow Eats Emperor’s Breakfast, Gets Declared Magic: Love it.

Chef Forgets Emperor’s Breakfast, Invents Haunted Sparrow to Avoid Death: Fantastic.

Courtesan EATS Emperor’s Breakfast, Invents Haunted Sparrow, Emperor Codifies because He’s Amused by the Audacity: Adorable.

Some Author Randomly Muses about Sparrow Spirit that Fights the Power: Still Fun!

Emperor Imagines, “What If Sparrow were Demigod? What would it Do? Probably Eat My Breakfast.”: Terrific.

According to the legend, it’s not a demigod so much as the restless spirit of a dude who was kicked out of the royal court for getting into a fight with another member of the court and then literally died mad about it. Apparently this restless ghost decided the best possible revenge was to manifest as a sparrow and eat all of the royal court’s breakfast for days on end.

Encounter: ghostly spirit driven by infinite burning rage at the living to take the form of a small bird and eat rich people’s breakfasts

Same here.

In 4th grade, my bff was in a death feud over chess with a boy in our class but instead of competing like normal people they decided that the best way to determine who was chess master was for each of them to select one of the two biggest idiots in class and teach them to play chess, My Fair Lady style, and see whose idiot won. We are just now, 22 years later, grappling with the moral implications of this exercise.

the spectrum of political literacy on tumblr

The absolute upper limit of what can be considered affordable for a home is 4x your income. Ideally it should be 3x, but 4x is the limit for reasonably stretching your budget.

Using Sacramento as an example, median home price is about $510k, and median household income is about $85,000

That number for Sacramento is 6x, and that's for a middling city with middling employment prospects. So the entire city for almost everyone living there is by definition unaffordable. And that's not as bad as it gets

Let's look at Toronto. Median income is around $91,000, median home price is just over $1,100,000. That's a ratio of 12:1. You would need to be making a quarter of a million dollars just to be able to qualify for a mortgage.

For a home to be affordable, one of two things need to happen: 1) incomes need to rise astronomically overnight or 2) home prices need to crash astronomically overnight

In Sacramento, that means the median income needs to double (to $170k per year), or home prices need to crash by 50%

In Toronto, that means incomes need to quadruple (to $370k per year) or home prices need to crash about 75%

This is how bad the housing crisis is. I don't think people truly understand the gravity of how bad it is. Home prices should not be this high. Incomes should not be this low. Look back 100 years and you won't find a time when affordability was this bad for everyone everywhere. Things must change

Bothersome beast, comforting friend