people on here interacting with neil gaiman is so. ur like this cannot possibly a real human being off anon!!! sitting down typing out an ask like that knowing the creator of the work will see it. and then ur like well dont be an asshole maybe it's just a 14 year old engaging in fandom for the first time! but then u click on the blog to see its a 35 year old actual real adult who went hello mister GAYman (hihihaha) thank u so much for making my coffeeshop au background relationship / rarepair endgame / slow burn true love sunshine sunshine protector dynamics of my dreams come true! u really had crowley say SMUT 👍🥳🤣🙌 but why was there conflict :/sometimes people argued and???? was that really necessary??? pls tell me rn that this is in fact a happy ending fic scenario otherwise I will have to kill myself immediately in exceedingly violent fashion and it will be ur fault (if michael sheen and david tennant don't kiss again in s3 u will feel my wrath. i know ur home address) anyways. are u aware of the omegaverse trope 😜 just blink twice if that is something we can look forward to in s3 😝😂🤭 also crowley wore different clothes during different episodes?? is that a continuity error?? or will that be explained in a3?

I'm licherally not exaggerating not even a lil bit

I’m licherally

not exaggerating not

even a lil bit

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

Oh look, it’s campus-police officer Lt. John Pike who pepper-sprayed peaceful protesters at University of California Davis.

And UCD reportedly payed $175,000 for this image to not appear when you search it on google:

Darn shame if this circulated…

So you mean to tell me that just by reblogging this I’m ruining an organizations plan, wasting them money, and uncovering some shitbag humans awful behaviour?

T R I P L E K I L L

DEFINITELY don’t Lt. John Pike by the nickname “Sargeant Pepper”; I know he HATES that.

You’re an ancient Greek man coming home from 4 months of war to find your wife 3 months pregnant. Now you’ve embarked on a solemn quest: to punch Zeus in the face.

Soon after you begin your quest, you encounter another man in a similar situation. You decide to join forces, as two mortal men stand a better chance at punching Zeus than one. Two villages over, you encounter a woman who had relations with Zeus and was left with a highly aggressive half-boar half-man offspring. She too feels your anger and offers to join your quest. By the time you reach Mount Olympus, you’ve amassed a large and formidable army of cuckolded/ravished mortals, demigods with daddy issues, mythical creatures with scores to settle, and a seamstress who you’re pretty sure is Hera in disguise. Zeus never stood a chance.

What I find best about this scenario is that the original wife probably expected to be murdered for her infidelity at worst or have her relationship with her husband ruined as he grew to resent her baby, at best.

Instead this man looked at his beloved and said, “who did it?”

And she replied “Zeus,” accepting he probably wouldn’t believe her.

And then he sighed, strapped his sandals back on and said, “I’ll be back before the baby is born.”

“Where are you-?”

“The lord of the sky came into my house, molested my wife in my bed and ate my food. I am going to settle the score.”

“Darling, he’ll kill you.”

“He may try, if he would like.”

You’re so right, that IS the best part.

I’m personally caught up on the seamstress.

“The pathway up Olympus is guarded by dozens of traps and perils strong enough to thwart even the Titans. How are we going to get past all of…” the shepherd boy with golden eagle feathers gestured uselessly at the slopes above them, particularly the herd of eight-legged goats snorting fire.

“There’s a way around,” Yiorgos said, though he was not specifically asked. But he had been the first to begin the march on Olympus, and so felt obligated to take the lead whenever possible, “In the stories there’‘s always a way around whatever obstacles the Gods place in our way.”

He hadn’t meant the words to come out as a question, but they had that lilt to them none-the-less. And even though he hadn’t meant it to be a question, much less a question directed at anyone specific, it was directed at one all the same. Just as the eagle-feathered shepherd boy’s had.

“Way I heard it,” a woman’s voice said. Rough with the Mycenaean Greek equivalent of a backwoods accent, and with the depth of a farmer’s wife who straps cattle to her back to carry to market, “there’s a back path. Hidden behind an invisible door that only one key in the world can open.”  Everyone’s eyes had turned to the broad older woman in heavy shawl sitting amidst supplies in the foremost cart. “Least, that’s what my grand-mammy always told me.” she added after a moment of dozens of eyes on her.

“Oh, we were so foolish!” That was Lydia, a lithe waif of a woman, many months pregnant, sitting opposite the seamstress in the wagon. “Of course there’d be a.. a quest. They’d keep such a key in the depths of Tartarus or in the golden chariot of Apollo, or, or-”

“Or”, the older woman cut her off in a voice both firm, but much gentler than she used on anyone else, “he’s like all husbands and has been promising to move the key someplace better for the past three thousand years but hasn’t gotten around to it.”  She gestured vaguely to the hillside, “Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was under, say, that bush right over there.”

It was. Of course. And everyone in the caravan agreed that it had been a very lucky and wise guess from the nameless woman and for the upteenth time since she first sat herself down in the front wagon and announced she was coming along with no further explanation, each and every last member very purposefully gave no further thought to the matter.

i know 196 is a reddit thing but like. what does it mean. what do those numbers represent

r/196 is (was?) the successor subreddit to r/195.

r/195 was just a place for some roomates to post memes, and it was named after their apartment number. There was only one rule: if you visit the sub, you must make a post before leaving. The sub eventually grew in popularity, the original members couldn't keep up with the demands of moderating it, and they closed it down. Soon after, r/196 was born and eventually far outgrew its progenitor.

r/196 also kind of just organically grew into a left-leaning, LGBTQ+ positive space. This was possibly helped because at the start, the only available user flair (a little phrase or icon that appears by your username on posts and comments) was "trans rights".

oh my god the king of norway from 1046 to 1066 harald iii aka hardrada hi thank you so much welcome to tumblr in the year 2023

Thank you, my thane, for the kind welcome! If only the rest of my subjects were as loyal as lathiat! Truly all that other vikings know today is how to polish their armor and drink mead. They can't even navigate by the stars or raid a monastary!

hahaha! *quickly glances at harald iii of norway's wiki*

couldnt be me! im extremely loyal and i love invading places for my king! *wipes sweat from my forehead*

My boys. Er. Two grown men not my boys at all.

absofuckinlutely not

You’re just continuing a long line of retail tradition babey

ok!

Cat with no trust issues

Your daily dose of spooky posts

have y’all ever had communion bread that was just so….nasty? like i know we have to suffer as christians, but do we really need to have whole wheat bread as the body of christ?

my old church used hawaiian bread. my standards are high

Some old housemates of mine were Syrian Orthodox. At their church different members of the church took turns baking the bread that would be consecrated for the Eucharist. This was all well and good until one woman baked raisin bread. This led to the memorable occasion of a rather flustered priest, who had not seen the bread until that moment, declaring, “This - except for the raisins - is the Body of Christ.”

EXCEPT FOR THE RAISINS omg

Raisins are just dried grapes though, and wine is his blood so really its like a two in one shampoo & conditioner except with jesus

like a two in one shampoo & conditioner except with jesus

World Heritage Post

100k notes and i'll @ my crush on this post

wrong. You have until august 1, 2023.

you have one week remaining.

lets maybe calm down and think about the decisions we've made

this is what a Bodhisattva is

Oh, literally!

Wait, did people think I was just saying it as a meme and not literally pointing out "this is just that specific thing from Buddhism everyone thinks is equivalent to Christian sainthood"??????

brutalist kitty

Aug 1st. it’s cement awareness month.

do you think a dude ever had sex with another guy

it might be difficult to figure out. consult the scriptures

these scriptures just have pictures of dudes kissing and groping each other

Penetration, my liege?

not now my dearest advisor i need to read these scriptures

i have an idea

oh no

its nothing nevermind..

...i dont believe you

skeleton pasbta.. radiatore for the ribcage.. conchiglie for the skull.. elbow macaroni pelvis,, fusili arms and legs :(

no phalanges?

orzo

Good news

SPOOKY CREEPY PASTA MAN

Every writer on Tumblr: “I would combust out of love if someone ever drew fanart of my fic!!” Me: “oh man I wanna draw this scene BUT THEY WOULD PROBABLY HATE IT AND HATE ME FOR THE NERVE”

Dear artists.

We, the writers, will accept any of your fan arts.

We don’t care if it looks like shit to you, or you think your art skills are not good enough.

We will love any fan art, because it’s the most beautiful way to say “I love what you write”.

This times a million. 

This also applies to aesthetics, moodboards, spin-off fanfic drabbles, and the like. Doesn’t matter how insignificant or amateurish you think it is – all of it is beautiful. <3

I had 2 separate people make tiktok fancam/fic trailers for things I’ve written and I think about that every day and watch them often 😭❤️❤️

I have every fanart in a folder i look at all the time

I have every

fanart in a folder i

look at all the time

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

Itty bitty kitty

(via)

death note

Certified Death Note heritage post.