BUCKET MAN - 300 POINTS - DOCILE IN NATURE BUT EASILY STARTLED. GREAT FOR BEGINNERS!
CAKE CATCHER - 800 POINTS - INCREDIBLY AGILE, MAKES A GREAT HUNTING COMPANION. HAS THE “PICKUP” ABILITY.
FALSE DEWEY - 1,000,000 POINTS - DO NOT ENGAGE THE FALSE DEWEY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. FOR PROFESSIONAL HUNTERS ONLY.
I think we should let Ron Perlman burn a house down. You know, as a treat.
Thanks @ingdamnit for bringing this to my attention.
Transcript: But I will say one thing before I get off this. The motherfucker who said, "We're going to keep this thing going until people start losing their houses and their apartments." Listen to me, motherfucker. There's a lot of ways to lose your house, some of it is financial, some of it is karma, and some of it is just figuring out who the fuck said that. And we know who said that, and where he fucking lives. There's a lot of ways to lose your house. You wish that on people, you wish that families starve, while you're making 27 fucking million dollars a year for creating nothing. Be careful motherfucker. Be really careful. Cause that's the kind of shit that stirs shit up. Peace out.
I recently found my “gold” hammer after misplacing it. It’s my favorite tool ever because it looks like a regular hammer trying to be fancy,
but then you twist both halves and unscrew it to find a flat-head screwdriver in the middle.
BUT, if you twist the very end and unscrew that
you find a phillips screwdriver.
BUT DON’T THINK THAT’S ALL THERE IS! THERE’S MORE!! unscrew the very end again to find a smaller flat-head screwdriver!
BUT THAT’S STILL NOT THE END!!
unscrew the end of this screwdriver to find a final, teeny tiny, flat-head screwdriver
look at how cute it is!
it’s like a matryoshka doll of tools.
I have one of these and I keep it in my IT toolkit because that teeny little screwdriver is the right side for laptop casings, but because it lives inside a large object it’s harder to misplace than a standard tiny screwdriver. Also because the look on a client’s face when you bring out a brass hammer to fix their laptop is absolutely wild.
“Johann Scheff, trans lady SW arrested in 1932 for nicking women’s clothes from a department store in Berlin.” We’ve always been here. Not even book burnings can truly erase it.
we’ve always been here. committing misdemeanors
I’m glad they let her wear her gay little hat for one pic
The only tiktok trend that matters is people filming those easter chickens and then going “who did ____ without permission?” and one of the chickens is so fucked up and its obvious who the answer is and the intro to You Gotta Move by Mississippi Fred McDowell is blasting
LEAVE THESE ANIMALS ALONE!!!
"Quivering" is my least-favourite word in the english language. Nothing and nobody should be quivering. If you're quivering right now, stop that shit immediately. Tremble or shake if you must but the quivering has to stop.
Guys, they're selling autism at walmart now
[ID for 2nd image: tags reading "we have autism at home" /end ID]
i think as a society we should go back to designing furniture w little feet. it would heal us.
please look me in the eye and tell me this doesn't spark joy
god today i ID’d an old dude buyin booze and he pulled out a fake ID with an elvis pic, then laughed and pulled out a matching one but with curly from three stooges on it, and im like okay please and he finally pulled out his real license and his legal name was steve sinner
that was the devil
Love the universe need of all babies human and animal to just lay on adults
A collection
Further proof
"what's your dream job??" Uhh to have 17 weird little hobbies that I don't have to be good at and hang out with friends. I get money via being the world's specialist little princess
just wanna leave all responsibilities behind and eat fresh fruits and pastries by the ocean and feel the sun on my skin right now
idk who needs to hear this rn but suffering is not noble. take the tylenol
One time when I was younger I was refusing to take headache medicine and my mom said “the person who invented that medicine is probably so sad you won’t let them help you” and now every time I find myself denying medicine I just imagine the saddest scientist making those big wet eyes like “why won’t you let me help” and whoop then I take the medicine
