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Yearning For Funny Drink…

@cranbearycurry

Hi! I go by cranberry on here.
19//Workaholic
Current top interests:
WoW/Slime Rancher/Pokémon/Kairosoft
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love will always find you. Both threat AND promise

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“but i don’t feel like i deserve it.” boo hoo. too fucking bad. Get loved idiot

parents are so crazy because they can say the most fucked up shit to you when your brain is forming and it sets the tone for your whole adult mind set and then they forget about it the next day

Pokémon headcanon:

Instead of regular swear words or using the Lord’s name in vain, characters in the Pokémon use curses that feature Legendary and Mythical Pokémon. They also do this for blessings as well, or any situation where you would want to swear.

Examples:

“Arceus” : catchall curse. (“Dear Arceus” , “I swear to Arceus”)

“By Dialga, I hate changing time zones.”

Of course these curses and blessings can also vary by region.

“May Zekrom smite you where you stand” (Unova)

“Giratina’s curses be upon ye” (Sinnoh)

“May Xerneas grant you good health and long life” (Kalos)

“Rayquaza, put an end to Kyogre and Groudon’s wrath” (Hoenn, during rain season and earthquake season)

“Ho-Oh’s blessings be upon ye” (Johto)

“May Lugia watch over you” (also Johto)

Sinnohan high schooler studying for a math test: “Uxie, grant me the knowledge to ace this test. Azelf, grant me the willpower to study for this test. Mesprit, grant me any emotions other than frustration with how hard pre-calculus is.”

“By Latios this cannot be happening” (Hoenn)

In Galar we just say fuck

children outside screaming: annoying but ultimately for the greater good. children need Going Outside and Screaming Time for proper emotional development. an auditory burden I am willing to bear

neighbor with his car he made louder on purpose: jail for neighbor. jail for ten thousand years

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I found a fic where Nemona has so many repressed emotions that she turns into a werewolf, which might actually be the funniest concept of all time like Woe. Lycanthropy be upon ye