Well Kinda, I’m back on a new account. Gonna just reset everything in a way. If anyone cares about my art or just wants to know how I’ve been I’m on @junkyardgems now, got a new main gemsona aha. But yeah, it would be nice to see y’all again!
my dad did end up getting a little electric push-lawnmower instead of the scythe, which, okay, FINE, no scythe time for Ship—but the on/off button for the mower is shaped like a coffin, so we have named the machine The Reaper
every time I use it I wonder if Death has upgraded for the modern era or if he likes to stick with the traditional scythe
He obviously uses a combine harvester to keep up with the growing population
This is objectively very funny but I like it less than the lawnmower because my costume potential drops significantly.
I'M LOSING MY SHIT AT THESE REPLIES HOLY FUCK
I gave my players a ring of punching. As soon as you put it on, you are compelled to immediately punch the nearest creature as hard as you can. If no other creatures are within reach, punch yourself.
Another one I gave was a murder dagger. It was a +1 dagger, but all damage it dealt was instead converted into number of hours the target would spend being harassed by summoned crows.
I was going to rewatch 1931 Dracula again tonight and just as I turned it on a BAT started flying around at my window and wouldn’t go away and I’ve never seen a bat at my house before and let me tell you I’ve been so gay touched starved this quarantine I was about ready to risk letting a wild bat in my room if it meant it could possibly be one tall, Sexy vampire
Ah rabies
But what if the bat was from my secret gay vampire admirer
Spent the last four hours or so starting on a new project: mapping the locations of famous horror movies set in America. It’s a work in progress, y’all’ see more when I’m done.
this is like when the RAF tried to figure out where to armour their bombers by looking at the distribution of bullet holes; the empty area on the map is where nobody lived to tell the tale.
It follows population density pretty closely except that the desert Southwest is over represented. Is that because it’s close to Hollywood? Cheap to shoot in? High density of chupacabras?
That’s just where the spooky is. Everything else is just noise from large populations.
Since @argumate brought this back, here’s what the map looks like today:
I started adding any horror movie at all, not just well-known ones. Also, it’s global now!
@cominyern Subgenre!
It lets you look at some cool regional trends, like how ghosts are huge in New England while aliens and vampires have a cluster in the Southwest.
that the original had a lot of black in Pittsburgh is unsurprising, given where a certain George Romero came from, but it now has an interesting relative density and variety.
(i blame the Tom Savini practical effects school in Monessen, personally)
I wish this was an interactive map I want to find and watch my “local” horror movies!
Ask and you shall receive! Here’s a link to explore the map for your local horror movies!
sometimes I remember that my mother, who has never heard of tumblr dot com, had the most white-hot take on Good Omens I have ever encountered. she heroically read the book at the urging of her hyperfixated fourteen year old daughter and when I asked her opinions she said something that will haunt me forever. the fandom is honest-to-God not ready.
when I asked her whom she imagined while reading about Crowley she said Danny DeVito
world’s most fucked up substitute teacher
he just spoke a banjo song
loudest noises: -dad sneezes -mom yells -trying to get a pot out of the pot cupboard -dropping the shampoo bottle in the shower -flushing the toilet at 3am in the morning -IMAX
I’ve compiled every raw ass quote from tumblr shitposts into my phone and i’m gonna use every single one of them in my campaign at some point.
peruse my quotes, if u want
So I recently got a wealth of new quotes to add to the list, thanks to @gayotic-stupid ! DISCLAIMER: Very few of these are from tumblr shit posts. Like my previous reblog, some of these are just cool quotes you can use in your writing or your dnd campaign. Reblog away!
EDIT: “you’ll be reduced down to a single atom once im done with you” because its fucking hilarious in context and raw as fuck without it
The sweatdrop
Liberal use of the V sign, even in situations that did not call for it and does not require a camera to be present.
Falling over because someone said or did something so incredibly stupid it made you lose all strength and will to live.
When they do the anime face thing
Making characters squishy
the dignity laugh
theres a special place in my heart for the dignity laugh
This is the first 100% pure and good post I’ve seen on this hellsite in years
I do actually miss the dignity laugh. Bring these back!
oh man do i miss 80s and 90s anime
My Printer: ZZZZZZWZWZWZZZAAZWHHHHZZZZZAAZWWAAZKADJASKLJAAKSALFJSDKLJSDK
Me, afraid with tears in my eyes: Dont say that
I' love to see a funny art of Blue and Yellow trying to avoid the "disease" that's infected White and Pink by over-wearing health and safety equipment. Like Yellow in a hazmat suit with a gas mask and Blue wearing a face mask, wearing several layers of gloves equipped with a tool belt of hand-wash, toilet paper, wipes, disinfected spray and hand-sanitizer. It'd match well from the part 2 art of their reaction of White and Pink.
Social distancing
maybe i’m just going slowly insane but the picture they used in this article about gay people walking fast i found today while procrastinating on my writing is driving me to hysterics. there are actual tears running down my face right now.
*mr. Krabs walking noises*
found out the "on all levels except physical, i am a wolf" person came out as a trans woman and she now has not just one but TWO girlfriends and a dog and they all go out into the woods just to howl sometimes. i'm happy for her and her gfs.
