fancy restaurant concept: it’s a fancy restaurant but the chef jacks off into the food
you will never blast rope like your cum cannon peepaw. die.
me walking away with a suspiciously australian cum shaped belly: *burp* what's the cause? heehee
yes I’m connected to a VPN. a virtual pussy network. that’s more than most of you tech bros
I only do problematic faves. If you’re not problematic, you’re not a fave.
always wanted to be sucked off by a veteran just so I can say “thank you for your service” as I bust in his mouth
find it funny that by the age of 16 I had consumed more “adult” content than my parents ever had
GOD I just wish I could get dicked in Serbia or one of those countries. fill me up with Igor cummies
Faggot Winnie the Pooh be like “I could use a few smackerels of cum in my butt”
smegmafactoryy
Anonymous asked:
Damn poor Benson getting hit on by Kathy Griffin. Anyway who do you ship in SVU, Smeg King? I ship Munch and Finn.
You're insane, they're just friends and I don't "ship" people because I'm normal about media, that being said:
I ship Rafael Barba's uncut Cuban cock with my mouth in open court I would give him head in front of everyone and lick his hole clean too and I'd fuck him right there idgaf if they hold me in contempt of court because I'd be holding that sweet hole of his in the jail called My Mouth and I'd let him piss on me idgaf.
Elliot Stabler on the other hand I really wanna suck his toes and finger him. He'd be hesitant at first but I'd tell him how a lot of "straight" guys get off on the prostate stimulation and then I'd make him cum buckets with three of my fingers in his ass and five of his toes in my mouth. I'd make him cum so good he'd let me walk with a murder charge.
I have so many in-jokes with myself but I don’t share them because they’re not politically correct
Shout out to all the men who are 40+ and still skinny legends and don’t have pot bellies. You’re the real MVPs.
From now on I am only affiliating with:
1. Asians
2. Gays
3. Jews
We’re getting all this model minority munty hunty
I love Asian culture so much that if I had to die of any disease it would be Hashmoto’s because it has a cool Japanese name
SHE IS ICONIC!
Died at whopper junior
She is amazing!!!
I hope Agatha Christie got her pussy ate. Idk who that bitch is but I still hope she got her pussy ate.