Graddy loves you

reblog the Don Draper of getting a job he’s unqualified for and you’ll have 10 years of getting jobs you’re unqualified for

YES

No but my dad actually did this at McDonalds in the 70s!

So here’s a true story: my father, sometime in the 70s was looking for his first job. He went to the local McDonalds and told the staff, [manager’s name] said I was supposed to start today. They took his word for it and started training him and by the time the manager saw him and asked who he was, people just said “oh that’s the new guy.”

Somehow this actually worked. My dad worked there for a couple of years as a cook. He even won an award plaque which he had on the wall until the day he died.

Confidence Helps

Me, walking into FBI Headquarters:

“Name’s Burt Macklin, I work here now.”

oh good to know the tumblr staff team has gone completely insane

sir im gonna need to see your male nipple license

sir that is my emotional support female nipple

tbh i was kinda disappointed the first time i sucked a dick. idk what i expected it to taste like but i was just like “oh okay”

Cock is one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but balls smell amazing. It makes me go a little crazy on it to be honest. Like, I cannot get it far enough down my throat to be satisfied. I’m only satisfied when I feel those intense, powerful, salty, hot pumps of cum down my throat. When I sit back on my heels, look up at you with cum all over my mouth and slobber running down my neck, hair all fucked up and wipe my mouth with the back of my arm and ask you if I did a good job and you cannot even speak because I’ve drained all of your energy out the tip of your dick….. That’s when I’m satisfied.

does that person know they LITERALLY invented comedy??? do they really know????

Oh wow the original graces my dash finally bless

LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!! LET’S GO LESBIANS!!!

Full offense but y'all need to stop fetishizing lgbt ppl. Lesbians arent straight men’s entertainment and sexual fantasies. Gay men aren’t your “YAOI GAYBIES xD” and you aren’t “SINNING SO MUCH RIGHT NOW” Bi people aren’t here so you can have a threesome. Trans men aren’t “uwu soft boys so pure” and trans women aren’t “big muscle wife could kill me”.

You aren’t less homophobic for fetishizing gay ships. You aren’t less transphobic for fetishizing trans people.

Stop.

Ok but yaoi was a big thing before lgbt people started coming into the spotlight. (I’m just trying to defend yaoi. Don’t mind me)

…. did you just say that “yaoi” has been around longer than gay people

yaoi threw the first brick at stonewall

When you are wondering if someone is gay and you look for hints such as the Gay Glance™ and the Gay Stare™.

For example:

Another example:

Taron has big dick energy for not shifting his glance

THANOS OUT HERE STEALING HEARTS, BEING A TRUE VILLAIN

Someone take away his Instagram. Please.

How the fuck is this guy better at memes than everyone on this site

Josh Brolin is an absolute treasure.

staff You are recommending that I follow a nazi blog I blocked last night. Your site promotes anti-semitism to Jews. Your site shoves Nazi Swastikas in the faces of Jews. It’s bad enough that the Nazi blogs seem to be sprouting up like weeds on a site that claims to have an anti-hate policy, but to actively promote them to people who have taken the steps of blocking these blogs is beyond the pale. Clean this place up. It’s turning into Stormfront. I encourage everyone who sees this post, Jewish or otherwise, to reblog it. Tumblr has been ignoring the growth of Nazism on this site for too long. It needs to end.

me snapping out of a depressive episode, trying to clean up the mess

LoL this feels like me rn

All you anti milkers are fools. Imagine a milkless world. No cakes nor pies. What are you putting in your coffee to cool it down? Water? Appley juice? I hate all of you.

Cream. 700 tons of sugar @ask-the-poor-unfortunate-souls

cream is milk hunty

oh i’m loving this already

Davis | Chris Fleming

WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE

[Description: The Mulder/Scully/Skinner bathtub phone call from “Hollywood A.D.”]

finally!

@staff after the 17th of december 

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