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@chocolatrchip

a mediocre tumblr user 21

There’s a weight to each blow. The blade shudders against armor and rattles resistance up through his bones. A moment, a held breath, and then it breaks. It’s a series of breaking. Resistance gives, armor pierced. Breaking skin, breaking muscle, breaking bone, breaking life. Blood spills over his hands, spatters across his face. He will never make peace with the warmth of it. He wrenches the lance free, spurs his horse forward. His mind is empty save for one thought which winds over and over. It’s a thought unchanged since his first kill.

I had to do it. Don’t hate me, please.

The reins bite into his hand, wound so tightly. From where he sits, he looks over a sea of soldiers. Colors blur together, and friend is almost indistinguishable from foe. Hooves press into grass, churn it into mud. Sylvain stabs downwards, finds another. He knew battle, killing, would always be inevitable. From the moment he could hold them, weapons were pressed into his palms. He had approached it with something of a lackadaisical attitude. Laughing as he spun the lance in his hands, made a show of assaulting the dummy. Where straw fell then, blood does now.

The first thing he had to break was himself. It was easy to classify that first fight as practice. The forms came naturally, the flow of battle clearly read. Then, shining metal pressed against a rusted breastplate. Pushing forward, until the grooves of the lance began to run red. Most of all, he remembers the eyes. Widening, surprised, pupils blooming with the sudden approach of death. Eyes that were open, eyes he closed. When he sleeps, he still feels them watching. He doesn’t hesitate now as he did then, and worries at the ease with which he kills.

He feels the arrows as though they pierce his own flesh. Distressed, his horse whines, begins to buck. Three of them, at the side of its neck. Its coat already shone with sweat. Unsettled, unable to be calmed, Sylvain desperately strikes at the approaching enemies. It’s not enough, in a different way. The horse rears. He can’t undo the reins in time. The lance clatters out of his hands. The horse falls to its side and onto his leg. Sylvain screams at the sudden weight, struggling to sit up, his hands wrapped around his thigh. “Shit… fuck!”

Sylvain breathes heavy, sweat on his brow, pushes his free foot against the saddle. He leans back on his elbows, attempts to push the horse off his other leg. Shouting with the effort of it, only to produce no results. He reaches out, fingers stretching as far as they’re able, until he can finally wrap his hand around the hilt of his fallen lance. He manages to grab hold of it, in time to defend himself from someone who thought him easy prey. He practically impales himself on the end of Sylvain’s lance. He lands unceremoniously on the ground beside him.

He keeps the lance in his hand as he makes a renewed attempt at freeing himself. With gritted teeth, he pushes at the saddle with his foot, his hand. “Come on,” he murmurs low, “come on!” He doesn’t know who says it, or which direction it even comes from. Either way, the chill runs through his spine at the sound, barely heard over the cacophony of weapon striking weapon.

“It’s the Gautier heir! Over here!” His head whirls, strands of hair stuck to his temple and the nape of his neck, and wildly looks for a friendly face, armor. All seem so engrossed in their own battles, the mess of saving their own lives. At the shout, he can see them all look around, find him. It’s over, he knows. And what has he done with it? The body beside him looks up at him, eyes wide, and silently questions the cost of Sylvain’s life over his. Sylvain doesn’t have an answer for him. He clutches his lance, and waits for them to descend.

Another does, first.

“You face me,” it’s a growl in his throat, as certain as the edge of his blade. Felix parries the blow meant for Sylvain, and steps in the way of those who approach. His feet flat against the bloodied grass, his stance solid and sure. Felix adjusts the grip he has, and stares down an army. Sylvain wants to tell him not to. To run, to leave him. He doesn’t, knowing it would be wasted breath. He uses the time Felix buys him. Sylvain’s heart strangles in his throat as he loses sight of him, gone in the fray.

“Felix!” Byleth and the others are sweeping across the field, pushing back the enemy. They won’t make it in time. He has to.

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roach:
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YES YOU DID
the more you reblog this the more it breaks
WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO
literally what is happening @staff you dun goofd

i tried to reblog this and the stupid app just crashed

what

wh

w-

If you’re seeing this, I managed to reblog this post.

I-

what?

i’m frightened

Attempting to reblog

I hope this breaks tumblr

instead of saying “i want to kill myself” whenever something bad happens to me as a result of circumstances beyond my control i’ve started saying “i’m going to kill god” and it’s honestly done wonders for my self-esteem

you know what? 2019 mood

stop insulting yourself. it doesn’t help.

But what if it’s true

it still doesn’t help. you can call yourself as many names as you want, but it won’t make you a better, happier, healthier or kinder person.

punishment doesn’t work. only positive reinforcement does. be kind to yourself and get better.

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How I Wrote A Novel.

This, in a nutshell, is what I did to get a book with my name on it.

NOTE: This is just my personal way of making the words go. Other people have different ways to make their words go. In the world of words, there are no right answers. There’s just lots and lots of tea/coffee/tear stains.

1). The Idea

When I get an idea for a story, I open up a document, label it “Brainstorming,” and start making a bullet list of events that consist of the plot.

It has to be an idea with tangible weight. A stray bit of dialogue or something vague like Halloween, that doesn’t give me much to work off of. Halloween creatures living on the same street where it’s Autumn every day- now that’s something I can build from.

What kinds of creatures are they? What do they do? What do their houses look like? The best ideas are the ones that spark more.

2). First Draft

This is the easy part- and the most challenging. Easy, because there’s literally no bar. I just sat there and typed. But it’s a huge mental challenge.

When I was in first draft mode, I wanted that story out. I thought that by making it such a rough, far-away version from the concept in my head, I was only delaying the day where I’d hold it in my hands. Turns out, that’s what got it to take on physical form in the first place. So I quieted down, grabbed my laptop and some hot tea, and typed.

3). Dissecting the First Draft

After I finished draft one, I printed it all off and highlighted the scant amounts that were passable for the next phase. Dialogue, descriptions, setting- anything that didn’t look like it was up to par was scratched out and omitted.

I call the above pictures A Slow Descent Into Madness.

4). The Second Draft

On a fresh document, I rewrote the story altogether- and it make a difference. I was coming up with things I hadn’t even thought of previously. And it was surprising how much better the plot was than the first time around. But it was still rough.

5). Draft Three

My method was to start with the bigger, more obvious issues and work my way down. Any plot holes I found were noted, and my outline was constantly under revision. I cut out entire scenes and made mental notes on ways they could be fixed/replaced.

This is where I started cutting chapters in half to make the story flow better- but I didn’t bother writing in usable chapter titles. Instead, I improvised:

6). Drafts Four and Five

These were dedicated to correcting the smaller, less obvious plot holes. This was the point where the story finally started to look close to what would become the final version.

7). Drafts Seven Onward

With the story line looking how I wanted, I then moved on to sentence structure. That one song that looked terrible? Rewritten. Over-the-top descriptions and excessive prose? Gone.

8). Editing and Proofing

This is where I had outside help. Besides this useful tool, I had two people check for spelling issues and the overall story. Once it was in decent shape to be made public, I asked for some additional help.

9). Betas

My betas were in the age range that my novel was geared toward, along with a couple of teachers and parents (as it was middle grade). I gave them the full manuscript, along with seven basic questions like “Which characters were your favorite/least favorite and why?” and “Was there a part of the story that didn’t make sense?”

I gave my betas three months to read a 42,590 word story, and by the end they gave me back the review sheets.

10). Final Adjustments

After I read over the reviews, I let the comments sit for three days so that I could proceed with a clear head. I smoothed out any flaws, scanned over the MS twice to make sure everything was right, and that is how I got to the end of writing my first novel.

Next comes publishing- which is a different beast entirely.

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For future reference. Wow, what a comprehensive post.

NSFW ban fail

Reblog if you’re still seeing porn bots despite the NSFW ban. I’m still seeing them. Plenty of legitimate followers seem to be blocked from my feed, however.

@staff da fuq dude?

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Mages: Oppressed

Templars: Mad with power

Grand Cleric: Unwilling to act

THE CHANTRY IS FORCIBLY REMOVED FROM KIRKWALL