the worst part ab having online friends is that to maintain the friendship you actually sort of have to have conversations with them. if we were all irl friends i would invite you into my home, give u my xbox controller & let u play a game on my bed while i lie next to u and coexist in ur space and backseat game you

You know that study that found when doing a blind taste test the majority of people prefer pepsi over coca cola so coke changed their recipe to taste more like pepsi, and people actually liked the new coke a lot less because the people who were buying coke didn't want it to taste like pepsi they wanted their coke to taste like coke. That's what a lot of the new changes tumblr is working on feel like.

we need to go back to hating tumblr. no more hellsite (affectionate). don't even think of giving these clowns your money. if i see you with a checkmark next to your name i'm opening fire

*sound of gun cocking* they can be disabled

tumblr's current business model isn't profitable and never will be and no amount of scolding from staff blogs or tumblr ad-free pay piggies is gonna fix that. don't let yourself be guilted into buying merch, badges or ad-free. you're throwing your money into a bottomless pit while the techbro ghouls running this website laugh about you at their next board meeting while applauding the shmucks coming up with new ideas on how to twitter- or tiktokify the website

''but tumblr needs to make money!!!''

if tumblr really wants its regular user onboard with keeping the website afloat then we should at least demand that they do the bare minimum in keeping the site functional. and right now, they're not even doing that. every change they've made lately has made the website/app worse. i should give my money to tumblr so what—they can make a more intrusive version of tumblr live? remove the chronical dashboard? come up with an even more transphobic way of doing content moderation? yeah, no thanks

[i.d.: a screenshot of text reading, “you do realize that check marks can be gifted to users?” end i.d.]

it’s funny to me how the logic behind tumblr’s new layout changes are to coddle potential new users, to make them feel more comfortable by giving them a layout that’s more familiar to navigate

…..by making the CURRENT users feel LESS comfortable by giving them a layout that’s LESS familiar to navigate.

they’re prioritizing a hypothetical scenario over their established, existing userbase, some of which (like me) who have been here for 10+ years

somehow instead of saying "as a treat", I've started using the phrase "for morale", as if my body is a ship and its crew, and I (the captain) have to keep us in high spirits, lest we suffer a mutiny in the coming days.

and so I will eat this small block of fancy cheese, for morale. I will take a break and drink some tea, for morale. I will pick up that weird bug, for morale.

I'm not sure if it helps, but it does entertain me

DASHBOARD UNFUCKER V1.0

as 90% of desktop users have probably found out, today @staff released an update that for some insane reason COMPLETELY remodels the dashboard to replicate twitter's. this is of course in the wake of numerous other thoroughly hated changes and a continued refusal to fix any of the site's actual problems, half of which stem directly from site management.

HOWEVER, thanks to the power of jQuery, i was able to throw together a userscript that remodels the dashboard back to its original look almost perfectly.

here is my dashboard right now, with the script active:

and here is the old dashboard in separate tab container that hasn't received the update:

it's hardly perfect; i had trouble making it force reload to the fixed layout when switching between other pages and the dashboard, and it currently only fixes just the dashboard. it's also completely untested on browsers other than firefox, and chances are it looks a bit screwy on ultrawide monitors. but for now at least, it's a good fix.

the unfucker is a tampermonkey userscript. all you have to do to use it is install the tampermonkey extension, hit "create new script", and replace the default code on the page with the script (link here) and save it.

I hate the "Oh ur posting without tags? how is anyone supposed to find ur post🥺" warning shit tumblr does now. the hand of god will deliver me unto others

'can i copy your homework?'

'yeah just don't make it obvious'

the like to reblog ratio being almost the same is so funny, people are NOT happy with at this update lmao

@staff if you [change] the [design] of the fucking [dashboard] i will kill you

after inputting some complex algorithms into my super computer i’ve determined what tumblr will look like in the year 2020

i love how this comes back after every shitty update staff makes

this website's moderation sucks ass and it has a terrible bot problem and there are an enormous amount of bugs but thankfully we have a staff team hard at work not addressing any of these but instead making shitty ui changes that nobody wants

i enjoy shamelessly normalizing medications. i enjoy saying things like “give me a couple of hours, my meds haven’t kicked in yet” and “sorry, my meds have worn off and im not feeling great” in normal conversations regardless of the company. ive never met a single person who talks about their medications, and i enjoy just dropping comments that make it seem normal.

this old post of mine is picking up speed and i’ve noticed now that it is cut short.

so here, my belated addition: i enjoy making medications (and the action of talking about them) seem normal, because they are.

Oh, my favorite thing in the world is to say, “Don’t talk to me before I’m drugged” in regards to waking up and needing to take my meds.

Or to say, “Oh, shit, I forgot my drugs” if I’m on something for some random illness–antibiotics, steroids, whatever.

Because, 1) it makes me laugh, and 2) the people who get mad you call them drugs get mad if you talk about your medication at all, so may as well have some fun.

people who buy anime figurines are brave because what if toy story is real. imagine leaving a mini komaeda alone in your room

I had an interesting night last night

I’m so glad I have tumblr gold so I can view this post

Tumblr gold users rise up

The concept of "spyware" has disappeared from the common internet lingo after it became the case that the word could now be used to describe nearly every major website and a huge percentage of the most commonly-used software.

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Once upon a time, websites & software that tracked your activities were considered borderline illegal, amoral, and certainly undesired.

Now it's a business plan.