NinjaPotatos

[last night i set out to create chaos]

HOLY SHIT, IT WAS THE ORIGINAL ONE

MAKE A WISH

the first post ever on tumblr

I WAS EXPECTING IT TO BE A REMAKE OF SOME SORT HOLY FUCK

WHO THE FUCK KEEPS BRINGING THIS BACK

World Heritage Post

like actually though. i’m in AWE of the notecount.

Out of Touch

OP is still active with people reblogging a 1m notes post once a week

They are the true hero

The orange kitty presented...

How an Armadillo gathers foliage for its nest.

When I'm carrying all the bags of groceries inside in one trip.

Trying to bring all the laundry upstairs at once without a basket

Posts that Tumblr will blaze:

• Blatant NSFW that breaks community guidelines

• Christian proselytizing

• Vent posts

Posts that Tumblr won't blaze:

• Spoilers for a shitty game that lines a transphobe's pockets

🔥🔥🔥🔥

Ah, I see. Thank you for your honesty. Please, take as much as you need. There will be enough for everyone.

A change of scenery. Simple, but marvelous.

A glimpse into your future, for you brave souls! (Divination is tricky business, tread carefully my dear!)

Knowledge from the universe, eh? Perhaps this will be of interest to you.

Rest for the weary, right this way. It's a personal favourite of mine.

A home-cooked meal you say? I like how you think! A labour of love worth savoring (and sharing with friends!)

For something to pass the time, try looking here, or if that doesn't hit the spot, here.

Seeking adventure to a far-off place? I know a way to get you there.

I hope you found what you were looking for!

Okay, not to be overdramatic but this is one of those things that makes me feel so in awe and in love with people. OP spent their time making this?? And it's delightful?? And full of compassion and curiosity about strangers on a hellsite. Take what you need, take a breath, enjoy this shared moment of human experience. I did. 💜

this is the funniest tweet i’ve seen in months bye

these are all the geek equivalents of Lovecraft’s Cat’s Name

his cats name couldn’t be that bad!!!! it’s a cat, what’s the worst name?

i am wrong, what the fuck

Me every time this post comes back

go Google why chainsaws were invented, it’s really fun :)

why.

I’ve seen everything at this point, so why were chain saws in-

HoLy FuCk

1) I LOVE HIS ACCENT. IT’S BEAUTIFUL.

2) PLEASE WATCH THIS. I LITERALLY HAVE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE. YOU WILL NOT REGRET THIS. JUST WATCH X’D

oh my god I cannot breathe

I literally choked at the end.

“…I’m not sure-”

i’m in tears rn this is the funniest thing i’ve seen all year

THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN

I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND THIS FOR SEVEN YEARS

DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO ?????

That last fatal scream tho

THE TERROR IN HIS SCREAM OH GOSH

i’m crying

WAAA-

I will always reblog this on the off chance some other poor soul has been searching for it

IT’S BACK

HOYL SHIT ITS B A CK

IT’S BACK?? ON MY DASH?

re-blogging again xD

what was that we were just saying about still having posts circulating from ridiculous numbers of years ago? 😂

I feel like it’s a duty to reblog such a natural treasure

I feel like it’s a

duty to reblog such a

natural treasure

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

I HAVE WAITED ALL YEAR TO POST THIS

YOU GUYS IT’S DECEMBER 10TH YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND THIS HAS BEEN IN MY QUEUE SINCE FEBRUARY

you have the rest of the day to reblog this

my cat died from lilies years ago so I will always share this stuff

Poinsettias actually aren't any more toxic to cats than most household plants. The idea that they're highly toxic is a myth and it would take your cat eating A LOT for there to be any serious issues.

The rest of these plants are accurate though and I want to stress the lilies especially. Lilies are one of the most common ornamental plants for people to keep in their homes and also one of the most dangerous for cats; even licking a bit of pollen from their fur or drinking water from the vase can cause a cat to experience fatal kidney failure. If you have cats, just don't bring lilies into your home at all. It's not worth it.

That includes daylilies, tiger lilies, Easter lilies, and tulips, which are often included in lists of "safe" plants but are absolutely not safe. Tulips are part of the lily family and just as toxic to cats.

Poinsettias are not very toxic to cats, but the milky white sap found in poinsettias contains chemicals called diterpenoid euphorbol esters and saponin-like detergents. If ingested, these substances will cause digestive upset, such as vomiting, drooling, or rarely, diarrhea may be seen. If the milky sap is exposed to skin, dermal irritation (including redness, swelling, and itchiness) may develop. Rarely, eye exposure can result in mild conjunctivitis (“pink eye” secondary to inflammation). Signs are self-limiting and don’t require medical treatment unless severe.

Via

Okay fuck it if this post reaches 666k notes by the end of 2023 I'll practise basic self care

Why 666k? Because it's funny and impossible so good fucking luck

Well, OP, I’m officially invested in this shit. Your whiny ass is doing self care if I have to drive to your goddamn house and do it for you.

By Talos this can't be happening

reblog this everyone i wanna see what happens when op’s reverse-hubris forces them to practice basic self care.

why? because it’s funny and completely possible actually so good fucking luck op

I figured out roughly how many notes it's been getting per day and multiplied that by the number of days left until the end of 2023

If we keep it going at this rate we'll be far past 666k

IMPORTANT

Okay so clearly I've underestimated y'all

So how about we make this more interesting?

I will practise self care if this post reaches 666k BY THE END OF 2022

Op you have fuckethed with the devil this post has gained 30,000 notes since I reblogged it last night

Reblog to throw a hedge apple in OP's driveway

What the fuck is this eldritch fruit? I'm in.

It's Maclura pomifera, commonly known as the osage orange or hedge apple. It is known to be native only to a small area of Texas and the edge of Oklahoma and Arkansas. Before the invention of barbed wire, it was pruned repeatedly and shaped to make dense impenetrable hedges to contain animals.

The fruits are inedible—not poison, they're just hard and taste bad.

The wood is super-strong, burns hotter than any other wood, and is ideal for making bows!

We should just fill this post with other interesting things as reasons to reblog it

Actually I like this idea, we should do that. Here's my fun fact contribution; actual old English, what one could call Anglo-Saxon (as opposed to, for example, Shakespearean English, which a lot of people call old English but is actually antiquated modern English), is a Germanic language, and modern English shares a lot of roots with German because of that. It was also, at one point, written with runes.

The hagfish is a deep-sea fish speculated to be related to lamprey. It exudes a strange goo that is believed to be used to clog the gills of attackers. This goo has been found to be a very good substitute for egg whites in cooking.

HAGFISH SLIME EGG WHITE SUBSTITUTE???

Saponify is a word which means to Turn into Soap

Which is great cuz it means you can threaten to saponify someone and it will both confuse and frighten them!

Wizard Convention Banned Spell List 2022: Saponify

This is absolutely fucking incredible.

160,000 notes have been added since yesterday evening.

OP has well and truly Icarus'd too close to the fucking sun

op you are absolutely fucked

you’re gonna have to brush your teeth, op. and take vitamins. 

IVE BEEN WAITING ALL YEAR TO POST THIS YOU DONT EVEN KNOW

I’m crying. 

i scheduled this a year ago..

Scheduling for every year

am i the only one who thinks it makes MORE sense for aces to have kinks. what the hell else are we gonna get horny over??????? being sexually attracted to people??????????? dont make me laugh

bumper sticker that says "go around me i'm crying"

The legacies people leave behind in you.

My handwriting is the same style as the teacher’s who I had when I was nine. I’m now twenty one and he’s been dead eight years but my i’s still curve the same way as his.

I watched the last season of a TV show recently but I started it with my friend in high school. We haven’t spoken in four years.

I make lentil soup through the recipe my gran gave me.

I curl my hair the way my best friend showed me.

I learned to love books because my father loved them first.

How terrifying, how excruciatingly painful to acknowledge this. That I am a jigsaw puzzle of everyone I have briefly known and loved. I carry them on with me even if I don’t know it. How beautiful.

absolutely obsessed with these tags

To celebrate the first of Halloween, I have to share with you my recent discovery: The Living Tombstone’s remix of Spooky Scary Skeletons and Freaks by Timmy Trumpet & Savage have the same BPM.

@kadabura Please extend this remix immediately, you’re doing God’s work.