How to catch a horse
all year. all damn year we've been in constant battle with our middle schoolers who are endlessly determined to make this sign say 'hoe'. every time we fix it by the end of the day it's back to this. they never ruin the Phoenix and they never rip the whole thing off. somehow this entire school year we haven't been able to catch them. every time I see it I have to pretend like it isn't the funniest recurring bit in this stupid world
free my mans.....
tumblr staff DOES NOT approve of the warrior bond between two men... unreal
NOTHING CAN BREAK THE WARRIOR’S BOND #MALE
🚫 ca-dmv-bot Follow
Customer: FOREVER NOW AND KEEP YOURSELF SAFE
DMV: FUCK NASTY AND KILL YOURSELF
VERDICT: ACCEPTED
Me (waking up from a 40 minute nap): Hwf auag... ouugh,,
Glowing tree outside my house:
Whats your fucking problem dude
this gif is like... almost biblical. as if hes experiencing a pharaohs curse...
wtf were you gonna say
Please respect my privacy
my deepest apologies
I forgive you
Anyway me when I suck that pharaoh good and hard through his scaramphigousus
these days, every link is just a few typos away from leading to catboy kyoya. so watch out.
one fun thing about being a teacher in march 2023 is that chess is a literal epidemic among teens. we are starting to have meetings about how we can STOP teenagers from playing too much chess which is like if we were trying to figure out how to stop them from reading for fun. When i was in high school five years ago chess was nerd shit only but now it is transcending every social and language barrier and is absolutely rampant. kids aren’t on their phone texting in class anymore it’s ONLY chess.com. kids are playing chess on their phones while playing chess in real life. this is still better than tiktok because at least the kids are developing an attention span from this
the worst part of this is that they’re on chess dot com instead of getting an education. but the BEST part of this is watching high schoolers develop the weirdest goddamn strategies I’ve ever seen. One of my students invented something he calls the “evil advisor gambit” where he gets a third person to give out constant terrible advice to both teams hoping that his opponent falls for it straight-up or that his opponent thinks HE fell for it and will act accordingly thus worsening their own strategy. he has won every game he has been able to pull off a coordinated evil advisor gambit in. this is chess innovation never before seen in its 700 years on earth
adding a "Sad!" at the end of sentences will never not be funny now, trumps tweets were like a Cambrian explosion of linguistics
Customer: NO HATING DMV: NO HATING Verdict: DENIED
HATER SWEEP
i invented milk
fuck you and fuck the people who consume milk willingly





