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cheerfulMetaphysics and happyDirges

@cheerfulmetaphysics / cheerfulmetaphysics.tumblr.com

Life is a small sad little room, and I just want to put up some streamers from time to time. And write stories about people making kissy faces. Actually this part is most of the time. I write poetry, but it's meh. I'm Virgil in a room full of Allen Ginsberg.

A sample of the great gun designs and selection from the Hard West video game. While some of these are insanely implausible, they are still a lot of fun and fit the whole Weird West setting for the game. 

These were created by Tomasz Cwick an amazing concept artist. Here is his page: https://www.artstation.com/artist/tomaszcwik

aside from the two belt fed ones these are actually all real guns

Please prove it?

real gun

real gun

real gun

real gun

real gun

real gun

real gun

The belt ones are also real

Literally every single one of those guns is actual and factual.

Went looking for Jerry x George fanfiction and there’s Zero. It’s all Jerry x Elaine and whatever this gem is.

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i want to read this but i’m afraid that looking upon it with my mortal eyes will kill me stone dead

Is no one going to question the fact that OP was looking for Seinfeld slash fic?

Oh please tell me more from your ivory tower of riverdale fanfiction

I JUST HAD AN AWESOME IDEA FOR A DnD CHARACTER.

a half-dragon, but instead of the traditional Dragonborn humanoid body it’s literally just a small dragon of whatever species the parent was. 

but with a human face.

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@bunjywunjy if I understand anything of DnD, its that the weirder the character, the worse the pun in the name needs to be.

I… kind of just want to name him Maniford. 

Manny for short.

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What about Man'yfes Drakebody?

(Man-ee-fes)

[man face dragon body, geddit?]

wait wait

what about

MANIFORD MANDRAKE

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I like it! Lock in maniford mandrake!

WE’RE DOING THIS. WE’RE MAKING THIS HAPPEN.

what color should this guy be? he’s gonna be Chaotic Good alignment but I’m torn between Silver, Bronze, and Red.

I think I’m gonna go with Bronze. I want the aquatic abilities and I dig the aesthetic.

just imagine this, but with the face of a dude and a devastating love of puns.

now, how the hell do I even roll stats for this thing???

What class will Maniford be? Sounds like a bard.

I wasn’t sure, but now that you said that I think he is in fact going to have to be a Bard.

update: I drew the boy!

good Dragonborn, best friend

what have i made

he’s perfect

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I drew maniford bc I love him

DFJKDSFHJKSD THIS IS GOING ON HIS FUCKING CHARACTER SHEET

DELETE THIS BEFORE MY PLAYERS SEE IT

His character sheet? Don’t you mean the Maniford Manifest?

well, I do NOW.

Our DM started lagging in the call mid DND session.

We tried to call for him.

Imagine if you were a Christian medieval person from a small village and you had a feud with your neighbour… how annoying would it be to see them in church every Sunday? Not only are you obliged to be in the same space with them every week but you’d have to watch them receive the sacrament and have their sins forgiven even though you know damn well they don’t deserve it… and on top of that you get the priest preaching “love thy neighbour” from the pulpit, I think the fuck not, I’ll not love an unneighbourly misbegotten churl such as he, preach though thou might, father

I think I just got possessed by the ghost of a man who’s still really upset about his neighbour’s pigs eating his cabbages

So this has been stuck in my head ever since I heard it three days ago.

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this is the polar opposite of Everybody Knows Shits Fucked

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i didn’t know this til i looked up the video on youtube, but this dude is a super cool and accomplished musician! his name is Rushad Eggleston–wikipedia describes him as “an innovative musician who has changed the way the cello is played,“ but according to his personal website he’s a “cello goblin & otherworldly jester currently touring earth” 

so evidently normal guns exist in star wars (called “slugthrowers” because of course) and they’re apparently super broken and extremely useful because they go right through shields designed to deflect energy weapons and if a jedi tries to deflect them with a lightsaber the bullet just melts and turns in to an equally lethal spray of molten metal 

imagine you’re the most badass sith in the universe and Some Dude With A Handgun challenges you and you’re just like “heh… primitive weapons… bring it on” and he shoots you and you suddenly get splattered with a shower of molten metal and you fucking Die 

I think about “better make it hurt. better kill me in one shot” every day and i thought it was from an anime but no it’s from this joker

hope yall with werewolf kinks remember that the alpha/omega power structures thing is a myth

werewolves aint tho

Me going through with an impulsive thought

This is a requirement for getting a geology degree

the sand guardian’s elusive brother…the stone guardian…

hephaestus quivers before him

mama

just killed a man

put a gun against his head

pulled my trigger now he’s dead

and mama

life had just begun

but now i’ve gone and thrown it all away

AND MAMA

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i’ll never hear bohemian rhapsody the same way, thanks