Happy Pride!

Every pride, you must reblog this. No exceptions

I love that four different people on my feed scheduled this joyous person to reblog by 8am on June 1. I look forward to seeing this a dozen more times today.

I'm gonna make a post with all of the 'stick figure violence' adjacent images I have. if anyone knows any similar ones I'm missing PLEASE SEND ME THEM. I have an unhealthy obsession with them.

oh yeah here’s one I made a while back

@b0nkcreat

I will be adding more in the next reblog

More incoming :)

I'm not done yet

There might be still more (also i may upload some "cleaner versions" of other stuff)

And that's it! You can reblog now :) I may also have semi-related stuff but that's all the pseudo-ragecomic reaction images i have

Uh I don’t think I’ve posted this here yet?? How

Karkat I think I fucked up the time line

YOU WOULD THINK RIGHT, HOW IN THE VAST VOID OF SPACE DID YOUR THINKPAN MANAGE TO FUCK UP THIS BADLY. SERIOUSLY DAVE HOW!?

Chill out karkat, think of it this way. Isn’t this the funniest shit you’ve ever seen. I managed to turn myself into a cucumber.

AND FOR SOME GOG FORSAKEN REASON IM A HUMAN TORMATO OR WHAT EVER ITS FUCKING CALLED

Listen up!

You see a post like this? Where OP might hurt/kill themselves? You hit that button that I circled

Hit that.

Click Suicide or Self-harm Concern

Yes.

Fill in the rest of it, and hit submit. The "content you reported" will fill itself in

Tumblr will follow up and help them.

Warning: this is only for mobile. If anyone knows how to do this for desktop, please add it!

This could SAVE SOMEONE'S LIFE.

YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE NOT TO REBLOG THIS.

I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF IT DOESN'T GO WITH YOUR BLOG'S THEME.

And yes, REBLOG. Liking does no shit at all. This isn't ig.

You reblog, people see it. You don't, people don't see it. This shit's that simple.

This could save someone's life. It's not a joke.

This isn’t some ‘oh yeah sure it could’.

This could legitimately do so.

Don’t you dare fucking scroll past.

This is good stuff to know!

please, please, please reblog. reblogging will take one second of your time. meanwhile it could save someone’s entire life.

please reblog!

Soo I have a blood kink... someone reported a post about it like this one time and I got a message from tumblr asking if I was okay and how to get help if I needed it. Was actually cool I didn't know it was a thing that tumblr would do and until now didn't know exactly why that had happened other than something with that post but not that they had this whole set up

Suicide prevention is important. It works. I have personally benefited from it.

But it only works if people know about it. So please consider passing along.

Please do this whenever you see any of this, it could really help someone.

One, please reblog. Please.

Two, if you're worried people don't care about you, look at this post. I dont really know many people on here who suffer like this openly because its all shits and giggles mainly, but I'm still posting it, incase you or someone else see's this and can help out another life. Please. People do care and they will, it's frustrating but there's always a hiccup in the road, even if yours has been years old. It gets better, and when it does, everything will be worth it <3

It would be nice if you reblogged. And please don’t swear at your theoretical reader, no one likes that.

Callout for Jewishkuvira/Sunny

I rarely, if ever, make posts like this, and I’ve never before made a blog for this, but I feel like this is necessary because this person is genuinely abusive, manipulative, and violently transphobic. I’m making this post for the purpose of warning others, because I know that if other people, especially trans people, interact with her, they will end up being hurt. If you can reblog this, I would really, truly appreciate it.

I think this is fully written for now, but I might add on to this later. Also, no anonymity here, my main blog is @joshnewberry. I just put the post on a separate blog for the sake of keeping it organized and easy to find.

CONTENT WARNINGS: rape, sexual abuse, pedophilia, transphobia, suicide, incest, and general emotional abuse and manipulation

Keep reading

A quick note: My nbfriend is a trans nb person, if I refer to them as my “girlfriend” at any point in the links here it’s because there was a brief period of time where they identified as part girl, to clear up any confusion.

Sunny themself used to use she/her pronouns and when I first wrote this they explicitly told me to use she/her pronouns. Apparently they now use they/them pronouns only, so I have edited the post accordingly, but I cannot edit every single link and archived/screencapped receipt in which she/her pronouns are used.

UPDATE 1/27/2016:

Sunny made a “response” to this post. They later deleted it when it gained only 4 notes and they were called out (too bad I archived it lol). To summarize, they talk about my childhood sexual abuse and even publicly give out links to the blog of the woman who sexually abused me as a child and act like it’s their place to even bring up (it isn’t), lie about their age and refuse to address their pedophilia and even say that I, a MINOR, made them uncomfortable because THEY forced me into doing sexual things while they were an adult, and claim tons of the abuse I suffered didn’t happen because “They don’t remember doing it.”

You can find their post here: https://archive.is/zdEN8

You can find my response, where I explain why their claims and excuses are bullshit, Here:

https://archive.is/Ctnqr

https://archive.is/YZs07

Also, here’s another post I made about their abuse that I figured was relevant.

ORIGINAL CALLOUT POST

Sunny’s URL at the time of making this was jewishkuvira. Their social justice blog was autisticgaybolin and their writing blog was lesbianwrites. Their old URLs include (in order from most recent to oldest): 031exuberantwitness, bipolaraang, yuetara, thankyoureally, lesbiandonkey, lesbiandoe, autisticamydyer, lesbiangamora, no-bucks-for-this-doe, heterophobicdonkey, heterophobicgoat, elodiefay, vachinas, ohonhonhonhon. They ran the blogs cute-bunny-noses (aesthetic blog), chinaselfcest (rp blog), and briefly were a mod on auideas, shades-of-grayro, and pride-flags-for-us. Those last three all have new mods so please don’t harass them about Sunny’s behavior, they had no way of knowing or anything. I’m sure there are others but I can’t remember them all.

Their current Vine account can be found here.

First things first, I want to say right off the bat that while almost everything here has receipts, there are also things that do not. As is the case with many abusers, Sunny is incredibly good at erasing all evidence of thier own terrible deeds, and once I became aware of their abusive behavior I archived a good deal of their actions but I could not save everything. Also, some of the links are to posts on my blog that have a tag like “like if you read.” If you’re coming here from this post you do not have to do that, it’s fine.

I have known them for four years and they have done this repeatedly: The moment they are called out they delete the post that got them in trouble (in the past they have even deleted their entire blog as they have now). If you truly cannot bring yourself to trust what I say because of this, that’s up to you and I respect that, I understand doubting unsourced information. But I’m hoping that you’ll take my word for it for three reasons: One, I do have receipts of MOST of the stuff, so there is still proof that they’ve done terrible things. Two, I am a trans person and an abuse victim, and if I’m saying someone is abusive and transphobic I would hope you can believe me. And three, like I said before, this is something abusive people are known for doing. The internet is an easy place to take advantage of, manipulate, and hurt others by being able to erase any evidence.

And if you don’t believe me? Just scroll past this. Whether or not you choose to believe me is your choice but the trauma I experienced and the years of being emotionally manipulated and sexually violated are very real to me.

I’d also like to mention that there are LOTS of things that Sunny did to me that I have not included in this post. Things that seem more minor but still contributed to the years of abuse I endured from them. I have talked about some of these things in the #seriouslysurvivor tag of my main blog (joshnewberry). I just want you to be aware that I am not going into as much detail as I could, but I endured abusive, manipulative behavior from them for YEARS.

Background Information/Early Abuse & Bigotry:

I have known Sunny, like I said, for four years. When we first met we were both minors, but they were nearly four years older than me (I was 13, they were just about to turn 17). We met over fandoms (Hetalia specifically, which I’m no longer interested in) and we quickly bonded through our shared interests. At the time I was identifying as a cis girl but was questioning my sexuality and gender, and they were identifying as a cishet girl. They would come out as a lesbian soon, and I would come out as trans, although at the time I identified as nonbinary due to internalized transphobia (note: I do NOT think that all nonbinary people are only identifying as nonbinary because of that, but personally, my reason for identifying as such was because I felt like I couldn’t be a boy because of internalized transphobia). I now identify as a bisexual trans boy.

Sunny and I became platonic partners a little while after knowing each other, and after we were both out (them as a lesbian and I as trans). Over time, they displayed increasing signs of transphobia that I did my best to ignore and excuse because I cared about them, and because with autism and anxiety I’m incredibly scared of confrontation and did not want to lose my closest friend. They soon made this worse by guilt tripping me and saying that if I didn’t support them it was betraying them and making them suicidal. I regret this now and wish that I had had the courage to speak up, because over the few years I knew them (and this is before things went really badly):

So those are a few instances I can think of from before things even went badly.

Here’s an (archived) post another user made addressed to them, proving that they were indeed incredibly transmisogynistic: https://archive.is/jvPXg

The main person who called them out for transmisogyny (they’re mentioned in the above post) was a mentally ill and disabled black trans person named Lex. They have sadly passed on now, but at the time they called Sunny out similar to how I have, pointing out their repeated transmisogyny and transphobia. Sunny responded by making an “anonymous” callout blog where they claimed Lex had abused them. They literally pretended not to be themself while defending themself (their old URL is elodiefay). Admittedly, I helped participate in this blog and I regret it now, but keep in mind that I was a 14 year old when this was going on, and they were 17-18 and insisted that I was a bad person who was betraying my friend and partner if I didn’t support them.

Archived version of the callout blog: https://archive.is/Q333R

Proof of Lex’s death and involvement in the situation:

I didn’t come out to them as a trans boy for months after I figured it out because they had already proven to be incredibly controlling and they had expressed vehement hatred of trans men. They had proven before to be transphobic, and I was terrified of telling them, and they had already begun to treat me terribly for reasons both related and not related to my gender. For example, they told me that they could no longer “look at my face without dissociating or becoming anxious” because I “looked too much like a boy.” They would insult my interests and refuse to let me talk about them and demand I change my Skype profile picture and blog URL unless they were related to interests we both shared. When I wrote fanfictions for fandoms other than the ones we were both in, they told me that it felt like a betrayal and I was “cheating on them,” and they wrote a fucking poem about how they felt like “they didn’t even know me anymore.”

Here’s an older post someone else saved about not using my pronouns (and dismissing their transmisogyny), there were tons more that I didn’t save.

(transcript: “non-females make me uncomfy too like if you arent at least 1% female you are a Threat to me and that even applies to my partner like when they used he/him pronouns at one time for themselves i had a panic attack. yes i’m cissexist for comparing he/him to maleness, along with everything else my messed up mind associates with males, what you gonna do”)

And here’s a screenshot of me on a forum in 2014 explaining that I used neopronouns because of Sunny not letting me use he/him ones.

(transcript: “Yeah, I use he/him pronouns. Honestly my main reasons for vae/vaem is because my partner is uncomfortable with he/him pronouns, and just like the way they sound. He pronouns are 100% cool with me.”)

Fetishizing Trans and Intersex OCs, Incest & Underage Characters:

One of my earliest memories of abuse and shitty behavior from them was regarding my OCs. We made lots of OCs together, but they were largely in control and they began to take my OCs and twist them how they wanted them without permission. In 9th grade (the grade I was in when we met) I was really into Ray Bradbury’s A Sound of Thunder, and I created characters inspired by the characters in the story. At the time I did not know I was autistic (it would be confirmed by my parents later), and I did not understand what was wrong with me: I had trouble understanding things, could not control my emotions, got angry easily, etc. The characters I created were meant to be a happy couple in a healthy relationship where one of them had the same struggles I had and the other was actually openly autistic, as a way for me to feel better about myself. The one with the same traits as me was named Travis, and the one he was in a relationship with who was autistic was Lesperance.

(you can actually find an old story I wrote for them here! You can see here that they were clearly meant to be a happy and supportive couple who helped each other with disability, mental illness, trauma, etc) (archive link: https://archive.is/BeOZ7)

Sunny ended up insisting that the character Travis was abusive, and they continued to insist this even after I explained that he was basically a self insert. They forcibly made them no longer a couple, refusing to acknowledge their relationship and claiming it was unhealthy, and making up headcanons about Travis being violent and abusive towards Lesperance (”when he gets angry around Lesperance he rips Lesperance’s hair out!”). They even wrote stories about Travis raping and abusing him, and even paid me through deviantArt points to write a story about Travis abusing him myself (I was like 14 years old). Lesperance was originally a cis boy, and Sunny insisted he should be “intersex” (they didn’t want him to be trans) and have a vagina for the purpose of shipping him with their own OC with a vagina (because they thought it would be hotter than if he had a dick). They then started calling my male OC a “lesbian” and shipping him solely with their own OCs (which is also transmisogynistic as fuck because the only reason they said this was because he had a vagina lol) because they thought it was hot, and claiming they had “saved him.” …..From a practically self-insert OC made by an autistic 14 year old sexual abuse victim….

Also, their main OCs were two incestuous underage twins (here’s an archived piece of writing about them that they did). They frequently wrote stories about them having sex “for the first time” when they were around 12. They were at least 16 or 17 when they wrote these, and they continued to enjoy scenarios with children having sex (they had other scenarios they would talk about all of the time, like alpha/omega/beta AUs where characters “had their first heats” as children and had sex with each other, or one where a college student seduces a “nerdy highschool freshman” and takes his virginity at a party) long after they had turned 18.

It’s worth noting here that Sunny heavily fetishized trans intersex people for their sexual fantasies and roleplays. You can find some profiles for their characters still up online, like this intersex trans character who “dabbles in sex work whenever he feels like it.” By intersex they literally just mean he has both a dick and a vagina.

(archive of the full profile: https://archive.is/HIzhc)

There was also their incestuous character, as in had a sexual relationship with his twin brother, who was ALSO intersex (this time just meaning “assigned male at birth but with a vagina”).

(archive of the full profile: https://archive.is/n2tRE)

AND ANOTHER intersex character, the one who was originally my Lesperance, now just dubbed “Princey.” As previously mentioned, he was a cis boy in the beginning and when they started insisting that they wanted him to have a vagina so that he could have “lesbian sex” with their other OCs, instead of “allowing” him to be a trans boy they insisted he should be intersex too, as in “assigned male at birth but with a vagina.”

(archive of full profile: https://archive.is/Re0a4)

They are not intersex and did not ID as trans when they made these characters either, they never tried to do any research about what being intersex means at all, they just used these characters as an excuse to write “hot porn” of people with “weird genitals” (either both a penis & vagina, or a “natural” vagina on a dmab person). They were incredibly fetishistic and insulting to trans people and intersex people as their entire purpose was to write porn of them that was VERY often underage and/or incestuous or partook in things like bestiality. They also frequently wrote very fetishistic things about trans women, you can see one example later on in this callout post.

(btw they were REALLY into bestiality to the point that it made me pretty uncomfortable, on their rp blog they did an “AU event” all about their character living on a farm and having sex with dragons there? they had tons of AUs where characters were centaurs or could shape shift so they could write about characters having sex with animals/animal genitals but it was “still consensual”.. yeah)

Sexual Abuse and Pedophilia:

Besides shipping underage stuff that was mentioned above, they also sexually abused me for years.

They constantly wanted to do sexual things with me, we did sexual roleplays ALL of the time because they thought they were hot and they insisted that I (who was four years younger than them and a minor while they was an adult) should be the “dom,” which they later used as proof that “they hadn’t actually sexually abused me because I was the dominant one.” They would send me “new roleplay scenarios” that often included rape, pedophilia, bestiality, and incest. They told me that our roleplays were “the only thing that kept them from killing themself” so I couldn’t say no to their ideas.

On top of that, they would then share these sexual roleplays with their friends without telling me. They’d also tell them about my “fetishes” jokingly, and send me texts after like “omg my friend thought that rp we did was so hot lol” or “haha I told my friend that ur into [x] do u feel like a sinner yet.” That meant an 18+ year old was hanging out with their 18+ year old friends showing them sexual things they had done with a child, and telling them about a child’s feelings and thoughts towards sex, without even telling him ahead of time.

For some reason they always forced me to be the owner of the Google docs we did our roleplays on, and they got mad the few times that I deleted the documents that contained our sexual roleplays, even though the reason I was doing so was because I was ashamed, guilty, and scared of them. They would claim that they needed the roleplays because they would get depressed if they didn’t have them to read, and they’d not only force me to un-delete them, they would then make a “backup copy” so they would have it even I tried to delete them again.

They constantly messaged me about sexual things and told me that they were getting off to the roleplays we did. They would tell me about their vagina in detail, they would talk about how they masturbated in detail, they would send me messages without any warning about new sexual scenarios they had come up with for their OCs (that were very explicit), etc. Keep in mind I was around 14 when this became common, meaning they were 17-18.

They would not only tell me about how they masturbated in explicit detail, they would literally pressure me to masturbate and make fun of me when I told them I wasn’t comfortable doing the stuff they said “would feel the best.” When I told them I wasn’t comfortable fingering myself even after the “instructions” they gave me, they continued to repeatedly insist that I try and even sent me messages on Tumblr asking me invasive sexual questions about “whether or not I had fingered myself like they told me to yet.”

When I finally told them that their actions had been inappropriate and pedophilic, they yelled at me, telling me I was just trying to make them look like the bad guy because “I had agreed to all of it and been fine at the time.” Apparently they now claim that I had somehow “coerced” them (an adult) into roleplaying with me, but other than it not being possible for a child to force an adult to do sexual things with them, I literally never did that - The only time I insisted I “wanted” to was because they had told me so many times that it was the only thing keeping them alive.

I don’t have many receipts of this that I’m comfortable sharing, so I ask you to just believe me when I say I’m a victim of sexual abuse, please. Many of the things have been deleted as they were over Skype or text and I erased them out of shame or fear. I have some documents saved of our roleplays to an old Google docs account in case I ever need proof that there were sexual things going on, but I don’t feel comfortable sharing them publicly like this.

However, I do have this screenshot of an anon message Sunny sent me during a time when they weren’t using Tumblr because they had been run off. Every so often they would have bouts of paranoia/guilt about the sexual aspect of our relationship and resort to guilt tripping and manipulation to make me insist that it wasn’t wrong for them to be in a sexual relationship with me (which they also tried to use as “proof” that a child had “coerced” them into doing sexual things). They sent me this after I made a post talking about Bea, the woman who sexually abused me as a 13 year old:

(archive link: https://archive.is/oMRSq)

They’re basically admitting to sexual abuse here considering they’re comparing themself to someone who sexually abused me. The only problem is that the ages are a little off (Sunny is just under 4 years older than me, they were 16 and I was 13 when we met but they turned 17 RIGHT after, and the sexual stuff continued longgg after that, until I was 16 and they were 19). I wish at the time I’d been brave enough to tell them that yes, they were abusive and hurting me/making me scared, but I was… well, a scared 16 year old.

More Emotional Abuse:

They told me multiple times that it was abusive for me to tell them my problems. They would purposely ignore me when I had panic attacks, silencing their cell phone and logging out of Skype if I said I was panicking, and tell me that I couldn’t rely on other people for help when I felt bad and if I kept trying to contact them I was abusing them and that “unless I stopped relying on other people I was using an unhealthy coping mechanism and I’d drive everyone away.” However, they constantly told me all oftheir issues and talked to me during panic attacks they were having and expected and demanded that I respond, saying that my responding to them even if they wouldn’t do the same for me was “proof I was a good partner.”

They even convinced me when I was about 14 that I had “serious anger problems” because I would get upset at them when they did shitty things to me, like ignoring me during panic attacks. They convinced me it was a mental illness and I had to “find ways to cope with my illness” when I told them that I was upset that they had ignored me. I believed I had “anger issues” for years because they convinced me that if I felt any negative emotion towards them it was “just mental illness.”

(But, oddly enough, they yelled at me for “making assumptions and not understanding diagnostic criteria” when I said I thought I had borderline personality disorder, but just this year I found out I reallydo have borderline personality disorder, lmao)

They would also frequently threaten to break up with me in order to get me to do what they wanted. For example, when I had just recently gotten away from the woman who sexually abused me (I talk about this more below) I used a ship that Sunny didn’t like to cope, and they threatened to break up with me for it unless I stopped talking about it and openly liking it entirely. When I made posts about the ship on my blog, even tagged ones under read mores, they would reply to them saying they were disgusted, and they made “vague” posts about me and wanting to break up with me over it all of the time. They claimed it was because they thought it was abusive, but being the hypocrite that they are, as mentioned before at the time of this one of their OTPs was underage and incestuous. They were shipping them back during the Travis and Lesperance fiasco as well. They even shipped a pairing from the same FANDOM that was abusive, and Sunny liked it because of the “power imbalance” involved (one was a king and the other was his sex slave).

Speaking of the woman who sexually abused me, Sunny contacted her without my permission telling her about what I had said about her abusing me. (a post I made about why this is bad)

Sunny would also reblog posts of mine from my personal/vent blog when I was 14-15 and they were an adult onto their public blog with tons of followers to “call me out” and when I asked them not to do that because I wasn’t aware I had said anything wrong and I was getting hate from their followers now, they asked me if I “thought I deserved special treatment.” You know, from my partner.

They tried to separate me from my friends and family, a common abuse tactic. They tried to convince me that my mother, who suffers from BPD and a few other mental illnesses, was abusive for simply displaying BPD symptoms, and told me that my (at the time) 12 year old sister was an abuser when we fought and insisted that I stop talking to her and even got mad when I talked positively about her, saying I was “supporting a bad person and they didn’t want to hear it.” They told me they “didn’t trust” my closest irl friend despite the fact that the two of them had hardly ever spoken before, and constantly said I should leave my other closest irl best friend because they claimed he “wasn’t safe.”

And lastly, they developed an incredibly abusive alter named Jia who frequently misgendered me, insulted me, belittled me, called me slurs, etc. That itself was a long and painful ordeal that was hard to address so I made a post about it here. (archive link: https://archive.is/TyIAH)

(the above screenshots, courtesy of the Wayback Machine, are two different times Jia came up on Sunny’s blog, once in their description and once making her own post. I don’t have much to add I just wanted to show off proof of her existence, you can make whatever you want of these)

RECENT EVENTS - TONS of Transphobia, Manipulation, More Emotional Abuse

After I finally came out as a trans boy (they went to my blog and saw me calling myself a boy and asked me if I was one over Skype, I knew I couldn’t keep it a secret anymore and said yes), they instantly broke up with me. I understand that, they’re a lesbian and they were uncomfortable being in a relationship, even a platonic one, with a boy. But they then began acting incredibly transphobic. They made a post on their “secret” social justice blog about how “trans people choose their genders so trans men are choosing to betray women and be oppressors.” In that same post, they told me that I was “betraying” them by coming out as a trans man. They deleted the post after they were called out for blatant transphobia, but here’s a reblogged version from someone who called them out:

(archived link: https://archive.is/ohx2u)

They continued to be incredibly abusive towards me and tell me awful shit like “I feel bad for your future partners” and they called me a “sociopath.” They even went to their own doctor and had him “diagnose me with sociopathy” so that they could “feel better and know they were in the right about things.” At least, that was what they said in the public post they made about me (which they deleted before I could archive)

They then literally told me I deserve to be treated the way the pedophile treated me when I was 13 years old. As mentioned before, I was sexually abused by a pedophile in her mid twenties when I was thirteen, Sunny was 100% aware of this and had even interacted with her. When I told them that the way they were treating me sounded like something the woman who sexually abused me treated me, they told me that I deserve it.

(Bea is the name of the pedophile who sexually abused me btw)

From there, they justified what they said with “You’re not 13 and I’m not 24.” They specifically referred to the age that the woman who sexually abused me was when I first met her and the age I was when I was sexually abused and claimed that they could treat me as badly as she did because I was no longer 13. Sunny is a legal adult now,. They were 19 during this. They had been a legal adult for over a year.

After this, they accused me of trying to abuse them by comparing them to the pedophile who sexually abused me.

So basically… after saying that I “deserve” to be treated the way I was by a pedophile and then justifying their own actions simply by saying “You’re not 13 and I’m not 24,” they made a post saying that they felt “violated” and painted me as a terrible person who was just trying to hurt them by comparing them to a pedophile. And btw, their “apologies” were never fucking sincere. They were usually a quick “Yeah I’m sorry” or “my feelings were hurt” or “well I was panicking so I wasn’t thinking.”

During this period of time they did and said some other shit too, like telling me that my actions “made their OC want to kill himself” and insisting I was stalking them and even referring to me as a “stalker ex” when I hadn’t been on their blog in days. You can actually find a post I made (with these receipts and more) right here on my blog:

http://phantomoftheparadise.tumblr.com/post/130117688845/this-isnt-a-call-out-post-because-im-not-even.

(archive link: https://archive.is/VbJ3B)

They also literally said the reason they were neglectful in our relationship was because they could “sense that I was a male.” I wish I had saved this, but at the time I wasn’t thinking to archive anything for a callout post. Here’s where I mentioned it though: https://archive.is/NU2s2

In the end they apologized for all of this, and although I was still hurt by many of the things they had said and they did not show signs of actually changing most of their opinions (specifically on trans people and my status as a trans boy), they told me they were going through a hard time at school and were frequently suicidal and needed support and friends and had no one but me to turn to. Looking back on it now I realize how manipulative this is, but at the time I did feel bad for them and wanted to at least try to talk to them periodically in hopes of helping them.

During this time they would try to make me feel guilty for not having panic attacks over them like I did when I was younger, and tried to make me feel guilty for having a romantic partner while they didn’t. I wish I had receipts of this, but I do at least have a post I made on my personal/vent blog (which only has about 30 followers) at the time which hopefully should help prove that I’m telling the truth:

(I put “jace don’t look” because Jace is my nbfriend and at the time they could not handle seeing me post about the stuff I was enduring from Sunny, which I completely understand)

They began to be (no surprise) incredibly transphobic once more towards me and also others. For example, they started making posts about their “trans headcanons” for various characters they like. Not only were these frequently fetishistic, talking about how much they wanted trans women characters to fuck them and talking about their penises, but at one point they started making posts about how a character was “obviously a gay man because he liked being fucked by a trans woman lol.”

They received anons about this and deleted the posts, so I no longer have those for receipts, but I do have the anons as evidence (this anon later contacted me again). Notice how quickly they dismissed things (later on they vented to me about how the anon was being overly sensitive and how “they actually hadn’t done anything wrong and people just never understood them”):

(archive link: https://archive.is/gua9s)

They told me in private about an OC they have who hates all men. That’s fine, except then they started making jokes to me about how she SPECIFICALLY hates trans men, and some of their jokes became incredibly transphobic. One of them in particular that stood out to me because it made me panic and I was so disgusted that I was too afraid to tell my friends was a joke about their OC forcibly removing the uteri of trans men so they can’t reproduce. They talked about this like it was a joke, as if trans people not only typically have to remove their ability to reproduce for the sake of transitioning but have actually in real life been made unable to reproduce.

They also frequently insisted that I come out to my parents. My parents are transphobic conservative Christians. I would not be able to safely do that. They insisted that “it’s not going to be that bad.” They compared their mother being accepting of them being a lesbian to my parents somehow possibly being accepting of me being trans if I came out to them, two completely different things.

Then one night, right after they had apparently taken drugs for their insomnia, they sent me a long string of manipulative texts. I tell the full story of that here

http://phantomoftheparadise.tumblr.com/post/135106595430/this-is-long-and-negative-but-if-you-can-give-some

(archive link: https://archive.is/HBnru)

To recap: They basically told me they were uncomfortable with me saying I love my nbfriend/romantic partner more than anything unless I specify that I only mean romantically, and they accused me of lying all of the times when I told Sunny I loved them back when we were close. They brought up how before things got really bad between us I had kept them from killing herself. They started shaming me for not loving them after they broke up with me, saying “I was still going to love you even after we broke up,” and they even told me that they “had planned to marry me if no one else came along” despite the fact that we were PLATONIC partners and we had NEVER discussed this.

(Asld and Kai are two OCs of theirs who platonically date btw. I only screencapped part of this conversation, I was saving screenshots to show friends because I wanted to make sure that I was right and they were really being abusive, because I worry obviously that I’m just overreacting or something. Also they bring up autism/psychosis/dpd/etc as if I’m not also autistic with a whole plethora of mental illnesses myself…)

They never gave a real apology for this, instead simply saying they were on meds at the time and thus not thinking clearly. They continued to insult me and my nbfriend’s relationship, at one point they said that Jace and I were “like John Watson and Mary” while Sunny was Sherlock. If you don’t understand that reference, John and Sherlock are the characters that they ship together, and after Sherlock disappears for a long time he comes back to find John and Mary happily together. Mary was despised as a character before anyone knew a thing about her because she “replaces” Sherlock/destroys Sherlock and John as a canon ship by making John get married to her. It was a direct insult to my relationship through their fucking ships.

Finally, after all of this continued on for what felt like forever, seemingly out of nowhere (they were apparently mad that I had told them I was busy when they wanted to talk, they left out the fact that my sister had just broken her foot), they made a post where they called me a rapist because I didn’t come out to them as a trans boy. They claim that because men make them uncomfortable, my being partners with them while not coming out, despite the fact that they proved both before AND after I came out to be violently transphobic and controlling and manipulative, I was doing the equivalent of raping them. They literally called me a rapist for this.

(archive link: https://archive.is/gTCyl)

Tbh the rest of the post is also clearly manipulative and abusive as well, but the parts of the message that I’m emphasizing are, “You still believe that I’m a pedophile and a transphobe (because even after I asked, you never told me you didn’t), so why don’t I just call you a rapist and a lesbophobe?” and “I don’t deserve to grovel at the shoes of some guy who makes me feel like I was RAPED TWICE”

We never even knew each other irl. It’s literally not possible for me to have raped them. And literally they are saying that because I came out as a boy (or rather, didn’t come out as a boy BEFORE they started sexually abusing me). They are calling a minor that they sexually abused a rapist and comparing him not coming out to them as trans to raping them.

Again: They know that I was sexually abused when I was a child, but they’re still accusing me ofrape because I didn’t come out to them after they treated me terribly and were repeatedly bigoted and transphobic.

Also, the “sexual stuff” we did over Skype (not counting their pressuring me into masturbating, I mean the frequent sexual roleplaying they would have me do which is what they’re referring to here) while we were partners was 100% their choice, AND they were a legal adult and I was a minor. Again, I told them that what we did was wrong because they were a legal adult and it messed me up and they told me at the time that it wasn’t actually bad because “I had agreed to it.” They also constantly willingly told me sexual shit, like what they masturbated to, with no warning or anything. We did sexual roleplays with our OCs, and they told me multiple times that it was “one of the only things that kept them from killing herself.” Also, they asked me to roleplay with them again literally only DAYS before making this post (you know… while they knew I was a boy lol). It’s not like it was something we did a few times a long time ago, or something I forced them to do, it was frequent and they always were the one who asked to do it and were the legal adult.

As for what they’re saying about “being on their deathbed,” this is in response to their claiming they were in the hospital with a deadly sickness. I genuinely cannot tell you if they’re telling the truth about this or not, but everyone I’ve spoken to agrees that their details are incredibly sketchy. Here’s a conversation I had with Jace about it:

(I blanked out the other person’s name for the sake of their privacy)

And here’s a post I made on my personal/vent blog about it too:

My mother, who has been hospitalized before, also said that Sunny’s details made no sense and were very sketchy at best, and before I even said that I believed Sunny was attempting to manipulate me she told me that I shouldn’t trust Sunny anymore unless they can provide more solid proof of their hospital visit.

The thing is, even if they really were in the hospital, they used this as a way to guilt trip me and manipulate me into giving them attention and in the end used the fact that I didn’t care *enough* about them as an excuse to attack and belittle me and call me a fucking rapist, and then they used it as an excuse to delete all of the posts on their blog (right after I made this callout post, they claimed to be sick once more and deleted their blog, their excuse being “so their parents didn’t find their blog if they checked their history while they were hospitalized”).

I made a quick, panicking response to their post calling me a rapist here if you want to read it:

http://phantomoftheparadise.tumblr.com/post/136160569410/jewishkuvira

(archive link: https://archive.is/kJL3F)

It’s not as coherent as it could have been because when an adult who’s been abusing you for months calls you a rapist for not coming out as trans to them it kinda makes you freak out lol. But I was sincere about my feelings, something I had been too scared to be until now because of how they had treated me.

Their response to this was simply “Lol he just said fuck you glad he showed his true colors.” Ignoring all of the points I made in favor of further demonizing me. Note that they also (and they did this repeatedly) called me a “male” in an attempt to shame me. I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean, but they did it TONS. When they were mad at me they’d call me a “male.” Never a man or a boy or anything else, a “male.” It was weirdly dehumanizing, especially considering their feelings towards trans people lol.

They later admitted they literally didn’t even read the post I made. They just read “fuck you” in the first line and refused to read the rest (btw they did this every time I explained why I was upset during this drama, at one point they just told me that if I sent them any messages they would “have their friend read and paraphrase for them instead”). Also they called me a rape apologist…. for no reason at all?

(archive link: https://archive.is/ea4U9)

SO, TL;DR:

Sunny/Jewishkuvira and I were in a platonic relationship, although they were frequently sexual towards me and had me doing sexual things over Skype while they were an adult and I was a minor and pressured me into masturbating. They were incredibly controlling and would frequently manipulate me into doing what they wanted through guilt and gaslighting, they would isolated me from friends and family, claimed that my anger towards them were “just anger issues” and I had no real reason to be upset, and other abusive things. When I came out as a trans boy they ended up being incredibly transphobic not just to me but in general, saying things like I had “betrayed” them and “was choosing to be a boy to avoid female oppression,” and then was even more emotionally manipulative and abusive. They compared trans people not coming out to others for their safety to rape.

They disguise themself as someone who supports trans people by talking about trans headcanons and having trans OCs, but they are mostly fetishes and they only used them to discuss sexual scenarios, plus most of their OCs are underage and/or incestuous because they thinks it’s hot, as well as “intersex” (but not really as they did no research about intersex people or their genitals) for the sake of having fetishy sex (and they would force me to roleplay all of these things with them while they were an adult and I was a minor).

Stay away from them. They’re a dangerous person and I’ve put up with their abuse for too fucking long. My friends and my nbfriend have been telling me for months to get away and I was too scared, but I’m stronger now and I’m not letting them hurt me anymore, and I don’t want them hurting anyone else.

edit added by detailcentral:

the lex mentioned in this post is not dead, in fact we have posts about them as well on this blog.

i made a character sheet. free to use as you wish, feel free to change whatever you want XD open source ass thing. spent all of ~maybe an hour on it.

Credit: the text in the insert-image box comes from this video, and the text for the top three lines (intense, complex, fruity) comes from this post. The actual image was made with the free NBOS character sheet creator, which is a sort of dated but free and solid text-layout sheet maker intended for ttrpg style character sheet creation.

Reblogging from the source, bless you OP

and so I guess here we are this year too 8′)

[full image]

they sent their drawings at the exact same time I’m gonna yell

I saw a friend with the clown

Don’t know if they are a seal or a dog… seog

some various transparent hunters bc i like he /p

★ | as usual, free to use with a reblog and credit on the post you use em with; no exceptions. (tags of the post DON’T count. and no, "credit to the maker" or whatever doesn't count either!!)

★ | reblogs > likes. spam like my posts and you're getting blocked. idfc about spam reblogs but just don't be annoying about it. any asks in the inbox about the subject will be deleted and/or blocked.

SO COOL!

You guys gotta help me think of a name for this boi

Possible names:

-Burger King Foot Lettuce

-Sammy

-Leonardo Dicaprio

-Edward

-Bingus

Please let me know if you guys have any other suggestions

big poppa bob

L..Leonardo Decapitated....

Elliott.

Bad horse