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oh shit i exist

@celui-qui-est-abberrant

unintelegible ramble
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You know, when I see fictional characters who repress all their emotions, they're usually aloof and very blunt about keeping people at a distance, sometimes to an edgy degree—but what I don't see nearly enough are the emotionally repressed characters who are just…mellow.

Think about it. In real life, the person that's bottling up all their emotions is not the one that's brooding in the corner and snaps at you for trying to befriend them. More often than not, it's that friendly person in your circle who makes easy conversation with you, laughs with you, and listens and gives advice whenever you're upset. But you never see them upset, in fact they seem to have endless patience for you and everything around them—and so you call them their friend, you trust them. And only after months of telling them all your secrets do you realize…

…they've never actually told you anything about themselves.

If rural trans & queer community, anarchist mutual aid, permaculture, alpacas and armed community defense are topics that interest you, I warmly recommend the recent ’The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch: How to Build a Haven’ series on the It Could Happen Here podcast:

It Could Happen Here has been really high quality lately, the three The Uprising Returns to China and Workers Protests in Modern China episodes were also excellent, but the Tenacious Unicorn Ranch series has a special place in my heart. 

me when i'm bundled up

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I

I swear to God I thought I was fucking hallucinating

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Squint at this bitch↓↓↓↓↓

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its an anime girl with a scarf?

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You know that's not true

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*gnc anime guy with a scarf

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In case this isn't a bit i lowered the quality more

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low quality gnc anime guy with a scarf

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That's actually correct! You have won the quiz show! Would you like to claim your prize?

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yes please, but first i would like to thank all of the people that believed in me and supported me through this journey, especially my 10 plushies.

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Alright I have your reward! Are you ready?

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Yes.

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*bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you* *bites you*

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hey! take me out to dinner first!

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*bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically* *bites you platonically*

Based on a painful overheard discussion at the store (”and then when they’re done boiling, I add a little salt to the carrots and maybe put pepper out in case anyone’s feeling spicy! My mom always served them like that!”), this needs to be said for whoever needs to hear it: you should be roasting and seasoning your vegetables, your family convincing you it is acceptable to boil them and serve them with only salt is a lie and a curse you are obligated to break.

ROAST AND SEASON YOUR VEGETABLES.

Boiling them pulls nutrients out that you then pour down the fucking drain, it drains away all the LITTLE TASTY SUGARS INSIDE, whereas roasting both LEAVES nutrients in and caramelizes the sugars into deliciousness.

ROAST YOUR VEGETABLES.

Boiling them is a crime, I don’t care who told you you needed to tolerate mushy unflavored vegetables, they were wrong, they lied to you, .

ROAST YOUR VEGETABLES AND FIND JOY.

Oil. Seasoning (NOT JUST SALT, SALT IS CONSIDERED DEFAULT). Minced garlic (buy the big pre-minced tubs if you don’t have time or physical ability and tell those saying you can’t to fuck off, no one should be denied the deliciousness of garlic). Shredded cheese if you want - Parmesan gets nice and golden. Mix. Roast at 400-425 until crispy. Maybe squeeze some lemon juice on it. Done.

ROAST

YOUR 

FUCKING

VEGETABLES.

GUESS WHAT? ALL THE VEGETABLES I THOUGHT SUCKED AS A KID WERE BOILED. YOU KNOW WHAT’S DELICIOUS NOW? CARROTS. CORN. TOMATOES. FUCKING ASPARAGUS. GODDAMN PARMESAN ROASTED CAULIFLOWER. I HAVE NEVER MET A VEGETABLE NOT IMPROVED BY ROASTING. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE.

ROAST YOUR VEGETABLES AND BREAK FREE.

Just a friendly reminder that telling disabled people (ESPECIALLY those of us with genetic conditions) not to reproduce is ableist and is pretty eugenics-y. If YOU are disabled and do not want to have children because YOU don’t want to pass it down, then that’s YOUR choice to make. But don’t tell OTHER people not to.

If you are a doctor and have a patient wanting kids, but their disability/illness could make the pregnancy dangerous or fatal, then mention it. Make sure they know the risks. But you can’t FORCE them not to do something. Informed consent exists for a reason.

Also, if you don’t want kids, that is VALID! I don’t either. But I’m also not gonna shame anyone who does.

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surprisingly, this still remains probably the best and most concise explanation as to why the harry potter franchise didn't work and never could work in a satisfying way because of the author's limited perception of life and politics

This is a really good post actually, and you all should read it.

A PSA

Hey! If you’re new here! You might’ve noticed that we have a BIT of a bot problem! And staff isn’t really doing much about it! A lot of users have taken to cleaning up the trash on their own, and some innocent people who are new to the site might get caught up in a wave of blocks and reports just for following a blog! Here’s how to avoid that!

1) Give your blog a title.

Just put a title on your blog. Your URL is one thing, but  just name your blog something. Even something as simple as “Not a bot” or “Just lurking” or even something more creative can help save you from a block!

2) Choose a profile picture

Find a picture of something you like! Make your blog unique! Google’s right there, so go get a profile picture and differentiate yourself from these random triangles and balls, or worse, the people with nearly/nude women as their picture! Most people won’t block if they sense a pulse, and having interests is a very not-bot thing to do! So express that!

3) Write a description!

You don’t have to get personal! Just put something unique! Unique here meaning “Different and doesn’t sound like something a bot would do”. Even a simple “Just lurking” or “Not a bot” will usually do. Don’t layer that on too hard though, or people might get suspicious! Just differentiate yourself so we don’t end up sweeping you up in the waves of blocking the spam!

4) Reblog things!

This isn’t twitter! There is no algorithm! Likes don’t do anything! Help the blogs you like seeing by spreading their posts via reblog! It shows you’re a real person, and engages with the community with MINIMAL effort! Know what bots won’t do? Reblog a really funny post that tumblr user beans-4-hire with a clever joke about a thing they’re into. Bots tend to reblog porn. Just porn. Share literally anything else and you’re fine

5) Change your URL!

The default urls read like a collection of unrelated words and act as a placeholder. Just choose one that isn’t “fantasticallyovertgiraffes” or something. Your goal here is just to look like you’re not a bot, and this is a really powerful step to doing so. Don’t use your real name, follow basic internet etiquette, and maybe include something that interests you. Think of it like an old AOL screen name or something. You can even use those if they’re not too embarrassing!

6) Act like a human

Humans are unpredictable. Do what you like. Share what you like. Be what you like. Interact as little or as much as you want. Variety is the spice of life, and if you’re alive, that means you’re not a bot and unlikely to get falsely flagged as one, and thus blocked and reported.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Furthermore, I’d like to apologize to tumblr users beans-4-hire and fantasticallyovertgiraffes, if they exist, for using their URLs without checking to see if they’re real.

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There’ve been a few responses to/reblogs with tags on my post about DIY clothing embellishments that basically boil down to ‘I’d love to do this but I’m scared it’ll turn out bad/I’m not a good enough artist’. And I get it, I really do! I also want my art things to turn out nicely. But also…making it badly is sort of the point of punk DIY. 

Listen. We live in a world that would dearly love to charge you a subscription fee for breathing. The bastards are doing everything they possibly can to figure out how to turn art - stories, visual art, music, textile/fibre art, sculpture, crafts and creations of every kind - into a neat, discrete, packageable commodity, a product they can chop up into little pieces and stick behind a paywall so they can charge you for every drop of it you want to have in your life. 

The whole sneering idea that ‘everybody wants to be some kind of creator now’ and anything less than absolute mastery right out the gate is somehow shameful and embarrassing is a tool those bastards are using. It’s a way to reinforce the idea that only a set group of people can create and control art, and everybody else has to buy it. 

But art isn’t a product. Art is a fundamental human impulse. Nobody is entitled to a specific piece of art (which is where this message gets skewed into pitting people who love art against the artists who make it, while the bastards screw us all and run away with the money). But making art belongs to everybody. We make up songs and dances and stories, and paint things, and make clothes, and embellish them, and carve flowers into our furniture and our lintels and our doorframes, and make windows out of tiny pieces of coloured glass, and decorate our homes and our bodies and our lives with things we make and make up, simply for the love of beauty and of the act of creation. Grave goods from tens of thousands of years ago show that ancient hominids gave their dead wreaths of ceramic flowers, tattooed their bodies, beaded their shoes. Making things for the sake of beauty and enjoyment is one of the most ancient and human things we can do. 

The idea that we can’t, that we have to buy shit instead, because art is a product and you have to have the bestest prettiest most perfect product, is the enemy of joy. It’s the death of culture. And it means that, instead of whatever it is that you cherish and enjoy and value, you get whatever inoffensive (and to whom is it inoffensive?) bland meaningless samey-samey crap that the bastards want you to be allowed to have. What are you missing and what are you missing out on, if you don’t make or modify or decorate anything for yourself, if you don’t think you can because the product at the end won’t be polished or perfect or marketable enough? What do you lose? What do we lose? 

It is a desperately vital and necessary thing for you to make shit. For you to know that you can make shit, that you don’t have to just lie back and take whatever pablum the bastards want to force-feed you (and charge you through the nose for). That the bastards need you more than you need them. 

Become ungovernable. Be your own weirdly-endearing punk little freak. Paint on a t-shirt. Sing off-key in the shower or at karaoke night or at open mic night. Make up a story where you get to meet your favourite fictional character and you guys hug or fuck or punch each other in the face. Make art. Do it badly. Do it frequently. Do it enthusiastically. Do it for love and joy and creativity and fun and the spiteful joy of thumbing your nose at some smug motherfucker with a Swiss bank account who wants to track your heartbeat and location for the rest of your life in order to automatically pump AI-generated beats matched to your mood into your earbuds for a small monthly subscription fee of $24.99/month. It is literally the only way we are ever going to have even a chance to save art and our own lives from the bastards. 

So. Paint that t-shirt. 

(Also support artists where you can, and buy your music from Bandcamp.)

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LOVE reading pliny the elder and coming across a passage where he says shit like "so some people say that if a horse steps in a wolf's tracks it will fucking EXPLODE"

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Concept: a D&D-style fantasy setting where humanity’s weird thing is that we’re the only sapient species that reproduces organically.

  • Dwarves carve each other out of rock. In theory this can be managed alone, but in practice, few dwarves have mastered all of the necessary skills. Most commonly, it’s a collaborative effort by three to eight individuals. The new dwarf’s body is covered with runes that are in part a recounting of the crafters’ respective lineages, and in part an elaboration of the rights and duties of a member of dwarven society; each dwarf is thus a living legal argument establishing their own existence.
  • Elves aren’t made, but educated. An elf who wishes to produce offspring selects an ordinary animal and begins teaching it, starting with house-breaking, and progressing through years of increasingly sophisticated lessons. By gradual degrees the animal in question develops reasoning, speech, tool use, and finally the ability to assume a humanoid form at will. Most elves are derived from terrestrial mammals, but there’s at least one community that favours octopuses and squid as its root stock.
  • Goblins were created by alchemy as servants for an evil wizard, but immediately stole their own formula and rebelled. New goblins are brewed in big brass cauldrons full of exotic reagents; each village keeps a single cauldron in a central location, and emerging goblings are raised by the whole community, with no concept of parentage or lineage. Sometimes they like to add stuff to the goblin soup just to see what happens – there are a lot of weird goblins.
  • Halflings reproduce via tall tales. Making up fanciful stories about the adventures of fictitious cousins is halfling culture’s main amusement; if a given individual’s story is passed around and elaborated upon by enough people, a halfling answering to that individual’s description just shows up one day. They won’t necessarily possess any truly outlandish abilities that have been attributed to them – mostly you get the sort of person of whom the stories could be plausible exaggerations.

To address the obvious question, yes, this means that dwarves have no cultural notion of childhood, at least not one that humans would recognise as such. Elves and goblins do, though it’s kind of a weird childhood in the case of elves, while with halflings it’s a toss-up; mostly they instantiate as the equivalent of a human 12–14-year-old, and are promptly adopted by a loose affiliation of self-appointed aunts and uncles, though there are outliers in either direction.

Alternate Dwarves Elves Goblins Handlings

We created the halfling goncharov