Cattern

AGHHHH

Help my legs feel like they’re on fire

I’m afraid everyone will abandon me when I mess up, so please lord let me keep this up so they won’t leave me

Dipping your fingers in wax is so fun 10/10 recommend to anyone everywhere

Waking up and checking to see if your dumbass got rid of all the puke is incredibly humbling

I’m in love with Crispin from bee and puppycat and if that’s wrong then god can strike me down

Why do words need to have a point? Cause sometimes I just want to say stuff man lkke pls don’t awkwardly wait for the rest of the story THERE IS NONE. That was it. Drown.

Getting closure isn’t necessary but it kinda slams tbh

Not to brag or anything but there’s superglue on my tongue and idk what to do

Society needs to be more like my dad, he’s cool as shit.

In lieu of my issue I’ve decided to come up with driving related pickup lines (with my friends) such as:

Are you a stop sign? Because it’d be illegal for me to ignore you

Are you roadkill? Because I want to observe your body

Are you aligned with the top of my steering wheel? Cause you’re my target (feels creepy but they all do)

I must be a red flashing symbol on the hood of your car, cause I require your immediate attention

Are you a U-turn? cause I’d do you in a dead end street

Are you a fire truck? cause I’d yield to you any day

Are you a curvey turn? because I wanna take you slow

Are you a radiator? because you are smoking hot

Y’all how do I rizz up a stranger (male) who I’ve never been within five feet of?

and tomorrow might be the last day I see him so this is urgent

Finishing bojack is like having your heart ripped out of your chest and feeling “it’s over”, but they do a surgery and save you and it’s not over. You’re more fragile now, maybe, but you are alive and you are still you. Even if you kinda accepted it, it’s not over yet. Unfortunately.

I really thought he’d be gone, in some way. Like his story is over, and so is he right? Because bojack can’t just keep going after all that, it’s gotta end. But it keeps going.

Would I still be sad if I was a man? Or maybe not a man, but just like a boy. Cause men have concerns cause they’re older and they too have to work, boys do not.

Why is everything so annoying and difficult, like what if I just want to enjoy things?

“Money won’t solve all your problems” it literally will? Are you rich? This is some kinda movie moral cause I swear to god no sane person says this

Wish I was a pretty girl or a cave dwelling monster

Having pain issues is so mid because I’m being punished for exercising

Like I thought you wanted this and now I’m writhing because MY LEG FEELS LIKE IT LIT ITSELF ON FIRE

Normalize saying woof but not actually barking just the word. And also, it shouldn’t be brought up at all later. It doesn’t mean anything unless there’s tone to it like a particularly upset woof. Mine personally are neutral.

“The ants go marching one by one hurrah, hurrah” song is so unreal because wtf do you mean they’re marching? How? Is the left half of their legs going forward then the right as a step? How can they play instruments, or use drums if they do? Do some of them stand on two legs to play drums?

So many questions and NO ANSWERS.