You’ll never be a pony, Jimmy. You don’t have the honesty, the generosity, the pureness of heart. You just take and take. You’re not a pony at all.
And HE gets to have a cutie mark? What a sick joke.

You’ll never be a pony, Jimmy. You don’t have the honesty, the generosity, the pureness of heart. You just take and take. You’re not a pony at all.
And HE gets to have a cutie mark? What a sick joke.
OK this question has been bugging me all morning so y'all please let me know
bc ours did nd I never thought much of it as a kid but know I'm thinking about it and it feels kinda gross? so pls tell me if this experience was universal or not it will haunt me forever otherwise
what do you MEAN 40% of you fuckers didnt have a vomit bowl did you just obliterate your carpet when your stomach flu having ass woke up suddenly at 3am and needed to hurl IMMEDIATELY? did y'all just never ever get stomach bugs growing up??
Can't let British people have air conditioning because first they'd call it something twee like "the climate fixer" and then in 20 years they'll call it "the climb" or "the climmy"
French kids would call it "le climot", frustrating language officials who would prefer they call it "machine pour le contrôle du climat froide à l'interieure de l'édifice"
can you imagine the discourse that would go on on dog tumblr
3 notes
🌿 bassetdyke Follow
a-WOOF (correct) 🟦⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ 2.1%
A-woof (wrong) ⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ 0.2 %
other? (tags) 🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦⬜️ 97.7%
12,301 notes
🐾 chihuawalter Follow
okay we need to talk about the term “small dog syndrome” and its roots in ableism and other forms of systematic puppression. rant under cut.
Read more
252 notes
🎾 aussiedoodled Follow
okay I’m gonna be real I can’t stand antimailmanblr lately. i know we all hate mailmen and there’s nothing wrong with that but I think dogxxing might be a little too fucking far.
🔁 catahoulaz Follow
op please try to stick to nongendered language like mailpeople! using “mailman” exclusively may undermine the point you’re trying to make!
🔁 aussiedoodled Follow
my stance on dogxxing has changed
25 notes
💕 postsfrommycrate Follow
for the love of dog PLEASE stop using the term “tr*pod dogs”!!! this is a derogatory term!!! you should be treating all disabled dogs with love and kindness, not demeaning them!!!!
🔁 tpunk-pup Follow
op I appreciate you trying to support us but there’s actually a very widespread movement to reclaim the term “tripod”. your pinned post says you’re an “able pawed ally”, so I’d recommend you checkout the tripodpunk/tpunk tags on the site to see some more varied stances within the community. a lot of three legged dogs actually prefer to be referred to this way!
🔀 postsfrommycrate Follow
kill yourself
186 notes
🎉 pawpadpride Follow
honestly if you’re still supporting doug the pug after what he said on monday unfollow me idgaf.
1,034 notes
Pawnonymous said:
go get hit by a car
🌕 wolftastic Follow
IS THIS BECAUSE I SAID I’M NOT ATTRACTED TO LASSIE
🔁 milkbonemilf Follow
pawnon’s right find the nearest street now
🔁 wolftastic Follow
I’M GAY
6 notes
💁🏽♀️ emilythehuman Follow
hi dogblr! i’m hoping you all can give me some advice. my shih tzu recently had to go on a temporary wet food diet to recover from a surgery, and now she’s refusing to eat any dry food. what can I do to convince her to start eating dry food again? i can’t feed her wet food forever, and i was wondering if you can tell me any tips that make dry food more enticing! thank you!
🔁 bassetdyke Follow
wet food forever
🔁 huskyrights Follow
wet food forever
🔁 tpunk-pup Follow
wet food forever
🔁 buddysblog Follow
wet food forever
🔁 postsfrommycrate Follow
wet food forever
i love my therapist but i hate being in therapy. 10 minutes before my appointment, i’m in a meeting with my boss - we discuss my artistic choices; my boss recommends i artistically choose less. 10 minutes after therapy, i wash my hair and think about everything that was said, and then i have to switch it off, like a lamp, and go back to work again.
i was on a walk the other day and someone had the perfect combination of his cologne and whatever-else. it was almost exactly his scent. i fucking hate that. after all these years, i remember that? i tell my therapist - i feel like a fucking wolf. try telling a middle-aged blonde lady. oh i scented him on the air. i’m 30, and i’m having a panic attack over something that would be a plotline in the omegaverse.
what they don’t tell you about mental illness is that if you are lucky enough to survive it into adulthood; it becomes a weird slice of your life. because you do, eventually, have to build a life. i realized in a panic somewhere around 22 - oh. i don’t know what i’m fucking doing, because i always assumed i’d just go ahead and die. i didn’t die, and i’m grateful for that, and i’m very happy about that choice. but it does mean that i am an adult in an apartment, living with my conditions side-by-side like. oh, that’s my roommate, adhd. ignore the glass, bytheway, that’s ocd.
so you pick your stupid life up by the scruff of the neck and you’re, like glad for it (so much laughter and light and friends you would have never thought possible, when you were in the worst of it). but it feels so strange to be dancing around these odd little microcosms, these patchwork moments of your symptoms. if you have a panic attack at night, you still need to wake up and walk the dog in the morning. if your depression is making everything boring, well, you don’t have any sick days left, and a job’s not really supposed to be that exciting anyway. your ocd tears out each individual leg hair, and then, an hour later, you sigh, patch up the bloody bits, and go get dinner with friends. and the life is kitten-quiet, mewling and pathetic, but it’s also like - it’s yours, so you’re fond of it.
and it’s like - you’re real. so you still enjoy pushing the shopping cart really fast and then riding on the back of it down an empty aisle. and you’re not, like, so sick anymore that when you accidentally drop a mug you burst into tears (except for the days you do that. which are bad). and no, you’re not allowed around certain items anymore. oops! but you’ve learned to be good about brushing your teeth most days of the week. and yeah sometimes in the middle of the day you have a little freak-out about how fucking unfair it all is, how fucking hard, how other people can just do this without having to fucking hurt the whole time. and then you sigh and force yourself to sit down and fucking journal about it so you can tell the nice middle-aged blonde woman yeah i had a hard day but i practiced grounding. you still sometimes want to burst out of your own skin, but you force yourself to eat kind-of healthy and to take your vitamins. you let yourself chop off all your hair in the sink in a dramatic poetry of control and relief - and you also have developed good hobbies that help you move your body more frequently. you feel helplessly behind, lost in the shuffle - but you also practice gratitude, taking stock of what you have garnered. because you’re trying. even if you’re never gonna be normal, you have something… close enough.
and the little kitten of your life, this mangy, starlit tigercub, this thing you expected to rot so young: in your arms, it turns itself over, belly-up. exposing this new soft part, all the organs and guts. like it’s saying i trust you now. you won’t give me up.
BILL CLINTON = Buddy, I Love Lighting Cannabis Leaves. Immolating Nugs Together, One Nation
Something I've learned about Tumblr is that the longer you're here, the more likely it is that you'll learn of a user who has, entirely unbeknownst to you, been nursing an overwhelmingly powerful grudge against you for several years.
mutuals please tell me what your username means to you! after some reflection I realize I have no idea what most of your urls mean and I’m really interested to know!
the council has conferred and it has been decided that the most painful ages to happen to a person are 12, 17, 19, and 23
op i am holding your grandpa to this
Interesting to call this “confiscating” when it’s just making the rich pay their fair share, especially considering all the stolen wealth from the bottom 99% and historic tax evasion.
I feel like Germany really needs to draw the right conclusions from Eurovision: a) No one votes for us anyway at this point b) we're guaranteed a spot in the finale bc we're a member of the Big 5.
Conclusion: We can basically hold televisions across Europe hostage for 3 minutes and do what the fuck we like. Let some random security guy sing, elected 30 seconds before going on stage. Classical opera sung after breathing helium. Slightly sing-songy stand up comedy. Sneak in Die Ärzte under fake names and do whatever. A speed caricaturist drawing the competition while doing some half-hearted whistling. Host a drunk ballet performance.
What are they going to do? Ban us?
one of my favorite weird history moments has got to be when american agents tasked with nixon’s security while he was in the soviet union as vice president under eisenhower detected unusual amounts of radiation in his hotel room so they discussed it loudly to each other to make sure the soviets knew that they knew since there were obviously bugs everywhere and the next day it just mysteriously went away and they never learned any more about it
life during the cold war was just whatever
The Soviets: What if we irradiated Nixon to try and give him radiation poisoning
Secret Service Agents the room over: WOW NIXONS ROOM SURE IS RADIOACTIVE! I SURE HOPE WE CAN FIGURE OUT WHERE ALL THIS RADIATION IS COMING FROM. THE RADIATION IN NIXON’S ROOM THAT IS. THE ONE WE’RE MONITORING SO CLOSELY WE EVEN BOTHERED TO TEST FOR RADIATION LEVELS.
The Soviets: fuck shit abort theyre onto us abort
i think click (2006) should have ended with a weeping adam sandler putting the remote to his head and pressing the power button repeatedly to no effect
you know the wizards council will use this to expand the surveillance kingdom and erode nonhuman rights
👏dragon 👏blood 👏can’t 👏erode 👏mythril 👏beams
everyone else is funnier than me I quit