currently reveling in violence

i commissioned @viridializard to paint my girls Kisa and Aira!!! everyone must Look At Them 👁_👁

128x128 transparent ibuprofen png for when u and the discord server want to take ibuprofen together

Pequeño pero matón

Ok but with how twitter and reddit are dying. What if tumblr actually takes off. What if the white house starts posting important things on tumblr. What if Joe biden announcement gets edited to cock monolog

texting straight female friends: good morning beautiful☀️ where’s your gorgeous face ?! hope you had a wonderful sleep

texting lesbians: it’s throw bowling balls down the stairs day U better be game

texting male friends: gonna beat you to death with a pillowcase of hammers Wyd rn

who's packing me lunch

I don't think people actually get scared about horror movies I think they're lying about that for clit

Clout

LMAO

i read the hobbit in 3rd grade and i thought it was really lame. however i liked bilbo baggins for some reason and i was fully convinced he was some sort of rabbit/mouse thing until i saw the lotr movies and was really, really confused

 “hi welcome to mcdonalds what can i get for you?”

“yeah can i get a deluxe quarter pounder with cheese?”

“absolutely, do you want the meal or just the sandwich?’

“uuuuuh hold on”

*fishes something out of my pocket*

“mikey what do i do?”

“get the fries. youll need the energy in the coming days”

*stuffs it back in my pocket*

“uhh yes please  the meal would be great”

Now that it’s back it’s hard to remember a time where they sued to get the post taken down

There’s discovering that you have a kink as in learning something new about yourself, and there’s discovering that you have a kink as in you always knew you were into it, but you didn’t realise it was a kink because you honestly thought everybody was into it, and of the two, the second one is much, much funnier.

It’s like the boner-based equivalent of folks with undiagnosed food allergies going “I just thought bananas were supposed to be spicy”.

Please… you CANNOT HIDE THIS IN THE TAGS

> #you never see foot fetishists talking about how all men naturally crave toes as part of the human condition

Not only have I seen that, I have seen it in a power point at a conference

You’ve seen in a what now

did i stutter

Throwback to that reddit post about the guy who learned exercising doesn’t make everyone incredibly horny and realized he’s come across as an asshole to every partner he’s ever had

I genuinely love (in a weird way) how horrified and regretful he is at how awful he accidentally sounded. This is a person who is self-aware, not an asshole, and never wanted to make anyone feel bad. 

I’m dying over here. This poor guy.

What if Buffy's mom hadn't found out about slaying at the end of season 2 and Buffy had to convince Spike to stay in town and pretend to be in a band with her because that was the cover story they'd told Joyce

And then eventually end up accidentally actually starting a band because it’s easier than maintaining the lie

Joyce says they can use the garage to rehearse and she always makes them snacks. Buffy starts to worry she'll never get Spike to leave

Buffy insists on calling the band Slayer and Spike keeps failing to convince her that there’s already a band with that name

Low key I feel like Buffy would just see it as a cover and it’s a ‘fake band’ but Spike gets like way into it and it’s a Real Band™️ to him and he’s a little annoyed Buffy doesn’t take it as seriously. He’s always like “you missed practice this Tuesday what the hell’s up with that. We have a gig next week btw”

kiss the robot (??)

isn’t it amazing that we live in a world where girls can be fat

god he was so right and sexy