failed blogger dies in tragic jerk-off accident

@carfuckerdean

Dr. Donkey says you're a cuck
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This guy was a total stranger to you, and you bailed him out? Hey, there were 3,000 people at that convention. He was the one I thought wasn't boring. That says something.

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i don't think "bluesky" or "cohost" or "pillowfort" exist i think y'all are just making up words, to me

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yaaaaaay yippee!!!!! the world so beautiful and we're cohosting it together ^_^

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In a world of dirty food courts, I'm one of the rare FEW who returns my tray to the slot above the trash and cleans up all my trash. SHARE THIS POST if you're attracted to women

we could provide electricity to everyone on earth if we put tom cruise on a hamster wheel and told him to go crazy with it. but the church of scientology won’t let us do that

The only thing funnier than the FOB We Didn't Start the Fire cover is libs handwringing over the "Shinzo Abe blown away" line as "tasteless" since a) it's literally just an update of the lyric "JFK blown away" and b) Shinzo Abe getting murked by a Fallout 4 contraption shotgun was one of the funniest and coolest things to happen in the last ten years and he 100% deserved it

Anonymous asked:

i love and admire you but not, like romantically as in wanting to get involved but as in like an old man going to the zoo everyday to observe the same incredibly aggressive bonobo that the zoo's too scared to try and put down as they both grow old and die

This genuinely the most loving thing I've ever been told in my life. I need a minute.

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