Pairing: Captain Syverson x Reader
Warnings: Scars, past violence, trauma, past accidents (for sy and reader)
Summary: You sit and ponder after your conversation with the captain.
Author Note: This was meant to be a drabble but now it has 3 parts, oops! not betaโd we die like me everytime Syverson comes on screen.
Youโd spent a few long moments thinking hard about what Syverson had told you and eventually you began to feel the anxiety being replaced by the excileration that seeped into your veins. You were excited at the concept of being free and not caring what other people thought. You found yourself smiling properly for the first time in what felt like years.ย
With a trembling breath you stood up from your seat and collected your belongings before walking back into the house and ascending up the stairs to your bedroom. When you opened your suit case it was the first item on the top of the pile. A red bikini lay there like a big red button that saysย โdo not pressโ, but you of course alwaysย had to press the big red button. So you did. With shakey fingers you lifted the bikini from the suit case and stood in front of the mirror, holding the costume out in front of your clothed body. You had been biting your lip for so long you could taste the metallic iron from the blood you had drawn. You wiped your lip and then proceeded to get unchanged as fast as you could, if you left it too long you were terrified you would change your mind.
Finally after a few brief moments you had the bikini on and you turned to look at yourself in the body. Your breath hitched as you saw yourself in a new light. You looked good. The scars were there of course forever taunting you, but even you had to admit that red really suited your form. Smiling from ear to ear you put a t-shirt and your previously discarded shorts on before setting off downstairs, without the protection of your book.
The discarded water from the pool clung to your feet as you padded across the concrete floor towards the deck chairs, a t-shirt and small pair of shorts the only things covering your flesh. You picked a seat next to your best friend Shelby, who was sunning herself after having been in the pool for the best part of an hour. Sitting up she was shocked to see you with your arms and legs on display, but the face of shock soon turned into a huge grin.
โFucking fire, Y/N. Youโre smoking!โ She cackled. You rolled your eyes and sheepishly sat down beside her. โWhateverโฆ.โ You smiled with a light blush on your cheeks.ย
Okay, you can do this. Youโre with friends, who cares. Just take your clothes off quickly before you change your mind, rip the bandaid off. Fisting your hands in the hem of your t-shirt you pulled it above your head and dropped it on the chair behind you. Before you could chicken out you rose to your feet and tugged off your shorts before discarding those too.
โOh my god!โ Shelby exclaimed. โYouโre making me so proud I might cry.โย
โMy god, shut up!โ You hush-shouted, trying not to attract any attention. The red bikini clung kindly to your figure and even you had to admit that you felt good in it. For years you had battled to try and regain any confidence but until now you hadnโt gotten so close.ย
โYou want a drink?โ You ask Shelby, feeling another surge of confidence. You could do this, you could walk around the pool in your bikini and grab two drinks, right?ย
โOh a coke please. With ice. And-โย
โI canโt hear you!โ You sing, walking away from her before she can add anymore to your shopping list. You swayed your hips as you walked, feeling like a goddess. Finally you made it to the drinks cart that Sy had planted out in the garden.ย
Shelby lay back against the deck seat, fanning her face with her hand as she watched you walk across the poolside. The creaking of the chair next to yours caught her attention so she turned to inspect the disturbance, finding Syverson laying back in just his swimming shorts.ย
โHey, big guy.โ She said, not at all phased by how outrageously gorgeous the man was. Everybody knew Shelby had always preferred women.ย
โHey, yourself. Whereโd Y/N go? She upstairs?โ He asked in a nonchalant tone. Shelby let out a giggle and replied.
โShe went to grab a drink.โ The captain nodded before laying further back and soaking up the rays from the sun.ย
Shelby sat up from her spot and dangled her feet off the edge of the deck chair, hand out to grab the drink in your hand even though you were quite far away still. As you begin to get closer to your destination Shelby is taken aback by a low growl behind her. She could faintly hear the low mutter of the word โfuckโ coming from Syverson, so she turned to see he was watching you. Resisting the urge to say anything she continued to watch as his eyes hungrily raked across your feminem form. His chest was heaving as he took you in and there was a subtle but noticable patch of blood on his bottom lip from where he had bitten down too hard. When you finally made it to the deck chairs Sy lay down and pretended he wasnโt looking at you, but Shelby knew the truth.
You werenโt entirely obtuse and you knew Sy was watching you, you were terrified he was disgusted with your body. Feigning confidence you gave him a small smile before you handed Shelby her drink and sat in the seat between them. For a moment you wondered what it would be like to not second guess every movement, every sentence and every thing you did. You wanted to sit and face your friend, but if you did you would turn your back to Sy and after he had given you this new found confidence that felt wrong. Whilst you were trying to figure out your best option, Sy abruptly got up from his decking chair and stormed off at lightning speed.ย
You couldnโt understand what you did wrong until you heard Shelby giggling to herself. Turning to face her you reprimanded her for being so childish.
โWhat is so funny?โ You grumbled, taking a sip of your drink. Shelby snorted before laughing some more.ย
โYou turned him onโฆ.โ Shelby whispered to you. As the words left her mouth your eyes widened with your mouth. A playful but hard swat was rewarded to her.
โNo I did not!โ Another swat flew her way but she laughed harder, throwing her head back.ย
โYou did! He had a semi, I saw it! You should have heard what he said when he saw you walking over here. I mean damn, if I werenโt gay as hell? that would have made me clench.โย
โSHELBY!โ You shouted. All of a sudden everybodys eyes were on you but Shelbyโs loud cackling bored them and they all went back to their activities.ย
โDonโt be so cruel.โ You said quietly this time. Shelby stopped laughing and placed her hand on her heart.ย
โBabe, no. Iโm serious! He asked where you were and when you turned up he bit his lip and saidย โFuckโ. He didnโt realise I heard.โ Shelby took a drink from the coke you had brought her before continuing.ย โHe growledย at you, girl.โ She finished. Rolling your eyes you put your legs up on the deck chair and lay down, pulling your shades down over your eyes.ย
โWhatever, Shelby. Guys probably got a queue of ladies after him. All of them gorgeous too, I bet.โ
โYouโre gorgeous.โ Shelby replied sweetly, laying back and following your lead.ย
โYou have to say that, youโre my best friend.โ You answered nonchalantly.ย
โYeah, but Iโm Gay. Doesnโt that count for something? Youโre hot. Suck it up.โ You chuckled. You no longer had the energy to argue about this topic again but you just couldnโt believe her, even though you had liked what you saw in the mirror, you just couldnโt.ย