Welcome To My Disaster

Allow me to elucidate, @a-sour-nectarine

When most people "roll their eyes", they flick their eyes directly upward, usually as far as they comfortably go, then resume looking normally.

When someone who learned the phrase before the behavior does it, they usually go in a circular (ish) motion. Since most eye movements are lines, it's usually pretty triangular: the key points are usually a diagonal up one way, then to the far other side, then to a diagonal low the first way. Thus, the eyes basically make a loop, so they "rolled".

I've found that when people who learned the up-down way first try the circular motion, they might risk motion sickness, so experiment carefully.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN MOST PEOPLE JUST LOOK UP

WAIT WHY DID I ONLY JUST LEARN THERE ARE DIFFERENT WAYS TO "ROLL" YOUR EYES AND WHY DO I DO IT THE LITERAL WAY????

it obviously makes sense, but one of my friend’s kids is going into swim class, and all the parents got an email today going, “when little ones are scared, they cling on to instructors. PLEASE trim their nails.” 

i don’t know why that’s so funny to me, but just. the idea of this poor, scratched swim instructor having to make sure to email before each class as a reminder to please declaw the children SENT me. 

When I taught swim lessons I remember trying to delicately ask parents not to cover their child in shea/coconut/olive oil before lessons.

“I understand your skincare regimen and wanting to protect their tender baby flesh from the pool chemicals, but COULD YOU NOT OIL YOUR CHILD LIKE A GREASED PIG before tossing them in the POOL? Thanks EVER so much!”

@nakimochiku i CACKLED

Ruby Bridges is 68. This is not ancient history. Not even close.

I know Ruby. She's a really nice person. The idea that they would try and write what she did as a girl out of history is shocking to me on so many levels, the simplest of which is just, but don't they know how lovely she is?

Sun and Moon Bag Pattern // Alyssia Creates

Crochet a Cute 'Star Girl Cardigan' ... Perfect For Summer Layering: 👉 https://buff.ly/3Ofcf82 ⭐ ⭐ ⭐

not a single thought behind those eyes

a face of a man who’s trying to picture a jar of peanut butter

Something funny about a cis man telling a trans woman that she doesn't understand how much it sucks to be a guy

Like, no, I agree, it sucks to be a guy. That's why I stopped. I thought you guys were supposed to like it.

i think banishment is the funniest possible spell you can cast on someone. like i'm not even going to fight you. YOU'RE going to leave. you have no choice.

a guy i banished to the desert 10 years ago finally tracks me down after years of plotting his revenge and i immediately banish him to the desert again

Credit where credit is due to James Cameron, at least he went down to the Titanic wreck in an ACTUAL submarine with an actual trained crew who spend their whole lives doing deep sea dives, the man did his research and wasn’t just throwing away $250,000 to look at a shipwreck

She balled so hard they banned her from ballin.

God forbid women do anything

im calling myself out on this one

For those who don't know: Ikumi Nakamura is the woman who was senior artist on Bayonetta, and designed the titular character along with Hideki Kamiya. Their greatest moment of bonding was over their insistence that Bayonetta keep her glasses on at all times. Nakamura cannot go to horny jail. She is the warden.

Happy pride month to her and her exclusively

she made a comic about the experience on twitter

For those who don't know: Ikumi Nakamura is the woman who was senior artist on Bayonetta, and designed the titular character along with Hideki Kamiya. Their greatest moment of bonding was over their insistence that Bayonetta keep her glasses on at all times. Nakamura cannot go to horny jail. She is the warden.

Happy pride month to her and her exclusively

she made a comic about the experience on twitter