instead of inktober I'm doing beautifultober!!!!
day one.......
day 2.........
I'll continue
day 3.......
HECK YEAH!!!!!
Can I join in?
Day 4....
oh FRICK yeah!!!!!!!
keep it going!!!!!!!!
Day 5
OH YEAH OH YEAH GOOD STUFF RIGHT HERE THAT'S SOME GOOD STUFF
A little bit too relevant to be comfortable….
I was talking to a kid in my daughter’s class today, and she said that she thought it would be fun to write a story about the Titanic, but with supernatural creatures.
So I said, “Yeah, that would great! What would the creatures do? Would they save the Titanic from sinking?”
And she gave me the most disgusted look. I have never seen a 9 year old face look so appalled.
“No,” she said, speaking very clearly so as to never be so grossly misunderstood again, “they’re going to eat the passengers.”
God I hope she lets me read it.
Every day you’ve dealt with your terrible stepmother and your equally terrible and ugly stepsisters as you’ve done your chores. One day, an invitation to the prince’s ball comes to your late father’s estate. After your late mother’s dress is destroyed, you find an elderly woman in front of you. She waves her wand through the air and suddenly a blue ball gown with glass slippers appear on the bench next to you. She claims you can go to the ball for only a small price. You have to kill the prince.
“No.” I fold my arms, meeting her eyes.
She blinks at me. “No?”
“Not for a silk dress and a night at a party. Only a fool would commit regicide for so low a price.”
The old woman hesitates, and her eyes narrow. “Well. True. Though it would only be regicide if I asked you to kill the king.”
“His heir is close enough, to my mind.”
The old woman rubs her chin thoughtfully. “Aye, that’s fair. But… if the price were better?”
I shrug. “I’ve contemplated murdering my stepmother and her daughters often enough. The only reason I don’t do it is that I’d surely be the first and only suspect. If a murder would truly free me from this misery… I’d certainly be willing to consider it. After careful planning, of course.”
“Indeed. Indeed.” She smiles grimly. “All right, my dear. Shall we plan a murder, then?”
it’s funny that the “friendship group of all boys with only one token girl who has no female friends” trope is so prevalent in media given that i have never in my life witnessed that phenomenon in reality
friendship groups with all girls and one boy without many male friends is something I’ve observed much more frequently in real life (even within my own friend group) so that should really be a more common trope than the other way around
0800-ARE-YOU-WADDLIN
my contribution that no one asked for
AOC taking Dinesh to the woodshed.
what… what the fuck
He actually publicly called PR a colony.
Get them Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez !
Mess with Puerto Rico if you want to! Did you see how my people handled the governor? Our pride runs deep and we have the voice of AOC!? TRY. US.
things to wear when i’m investigating an abandoned castle that’s heavily rumoured to be infested with vampires
i consider it a true tragedy and failure that we, as a human race, have let lavish masquerade balls go out of fashion
same energy
god. god. im glad i have the gay gene so i can listen to abba and lose my fucking MIND. its so sad straight people cant appreciate abba like we do
me listening to voulez vous
i love people who are incredibly book smart but otherwise stupid as shit. i have a friend who got a 4.0 in college but had to ask me if there were calories in soap
I remarked on the gorgeous harvest moon a few nights back to my brother who turned to stare at me in disgust before letting me know that the giant glowing orange orb in the sky was in fact “the fucking sun”. Cambridge granted me a PhD.
Someone’s probably already done this, but alignment chart of “realistic” cgi or cgi that tried to stay as close to the original as possible. I don’t not take constructive criticism
when i was a little kid, i didn’t care for movies. my parents always admonished me for sitting too close to the screen or fidgeting too much, so i turned to books instead. when i was four, i tried to watch the first harry potter movie. i absolutely loved it, but it wasn’t enough for me. i had to get my hands on that book. the teachers at pre-school said it was a horrible idea, but i read the first two books anyway.
then came kindergarten. the teachers scolded my parents for letting me bring novels to school. “she can’t possibly understand them,” they said. so they gave me tests on the books. i made perfect scores on all of them. i preferred books to movies and television; movies didn’t do justice to the stories i loved.
so, they marked me down as a “gifted child.” they tested my IQ and everything. i was the perfect student, in their eyes. i sat in the front and listened to the teachers as intently as i could.
one day after school, i ran up to my mother and hugged her. then, i turned my head and saw my mother walking towards me. i looked up at the woman i had hugged. “you’re not my mother,” i said, astutely.
my mother, a clever woman, thought to have my eyesight tested. turns out, i had horrible vision. somewhere around 20/450. functionally blind without glasses. not ideal for anyone, especially a six year old.
all my life until that point, people thought i must be some sort of brilliant prodigy, eschewing television and movies for more intellectual pursuits, but actually i just couldn’t fucking see lol
This took a different direction than I was expecting.
the dynamic between heinz doofenschmirtz and perry the platypus would probably come off as v romantic and gay if they were two people in a similar age range rather than a dude and a platypus. no i dont ship them but think about it. villainous monologues are already a very romantic and gay thing in itself (don’t question me on this you know im right). listening to somebody ramble excitedly about something they’re proud of is even more romantic and cute af. also doofensmirtz is already gay anyway. the only thing preventing this from becoming Peak Gay is the fact that perry is strictly professional and also a platypus. thanks for coming to my ted talk
“Perry is strictly professional and also a platypus”
I love the fact that “professional” is the first reason and “platypus” is the second, because this is extremely plausible for Perry.
“Yeah no I can’t fuck I’m on duty”.
Did you know that…?
1.Doofenshmirtz isn’t evil anymore,allowing Perry to date him
2.Romance betweet animal/human isn’t frowned upon in the Dwampyverse
we even got humans falling in love with inanimate objects, albeit played for laughs
one of Doofenshmirtz’ dates ditched him for a whale
we are talking about a universe where this is canon
for god’s sake
Look, I’m not that knowledgeable about Phineas and Ferb lore (although I’m very glad that my post resonated with the Gay Scientists Dating Tired Platypuses fandom) but what, pray tell, the fuck is going on? am i having a stroke? im willing to accept the teacher falling in love with her desk because language teachers just are like that but is this nerd about to bang an ice cone?? hello?????
It’s the ice cream machine,and her name is Carla
Let us also pop bottles for the time Doofenshmirtz had to help his ex-thwarty call’s current nemesis become desirable for punching again.
I thought Perry was with the Panda?
That’s a funny history actually.Peter the Panda is also dating his respective nemesis,he even got to met his parents
‘‘our boy is all grown up’‘ ‘‘why is he a panda bear’‘
had me crying
I think there was a scene where Peter and Perry were having dinner together at a fancy restaurant. But that was before Doofenshmirtz stopped being evil.
what the fuck is going on in Phineas and Ferb
@deenalloh you have to watch milo murphy’s law season 2 to know what’s going on with Doofenshmirtz life.He stopped being evil to commit to his future self: ‘’Professor Time’’ inventor of time-travel and a public figure.
and he is trying to be a good guy now
also there’s 2 more time lines where he ends up good
1.Science teacher
2. O.W.C.A agent (The OWCA Files)
this universe is big and vast and doesn’t end at Phineas and Ferb
Okay but saying that just because some people in that universe are in love with animals/inanimate objects doesn’t mean it’s normal.
I mean, in our universe, someone wanted to marry the Eiffel Tower.
yeah..but you see..there’s this wonderful thing in cartoons that real life doesn’t have and its animals being actual sentient/anthropomorphic. So,you can’t compare our life with a cartoon ship in this case
Also Perry is arguably one of the smartest characters on both shows when it comes to deductive reasoning, common sense, and social intelligence. He could tell just by looking at a room exactly what happened there a few hours ago. He can problem-solve on the fly, and does so very often. He has basic engineering skills (or at least, “basic” for this universe, which is kinda masterful for our universe), and can communicate complex thoughts to others despite being physically incapable of speaking English (he even knows ASL!) To claim that Perry the Platypus is incapable of providing consent simply because he isn’t human is a disservice to his character. And honestly, if we’re going by the anthropological definition of “human” (bipedal, opposable thumbs, ability to communicate complex thought), then he is by all means “human.” He’s just… A Human Platypus. …?
What the fuck became of my post
Also Doof is legally an Ocelot
Logan that only raises more questions on an already strange post
It’s canon. In the OWCA Files. Him legally being an ocelot is what allows him to be an agent.
What the FUCK
Yeah, in one part of his long, tragic backstory, he was abandon and raised by ocelots
I was wondering when someone was gonna bring up the ocelot thing
i know lots of you might be worrying about what you need to move into your first apartment. that’s why i put this little checklist together!
This is a good post, but I’ve got a couple additions that OP overlooked:
2. 1,000 candelabras 3. full-size pipe organ
4. canoe for the lake under your building
5. a doll of the girl you’ve been in love with since she was little
Twitter made the Jewish lady that posted this delete it for “threatening violence.”
Her followers spent the rest of the day tweeting this. Trolls couldn’t keep up.
Coming from someone who studies the Holocaust and the history surrounding it, It is important to remember that Nazis were human, not monsters. It’s important because if we dehumanize them we create a level of separation between us and them. It’s important because if we create that level of removal, we start ignoring the subtle signs of antisemitism because “Oh, well they’re just a normal human, not a monster, i’m sure it’ll be alright.” It’s important because when we create that level of removal, they come back in waves. It’s important because when you create that level of separation, you get the problems that we have now.
There is a very simple set of brain equations involved when we dehumanize the enemy, and it goes something like this:
“Nazis are monsters” “I would not be friends with a monster” The CORRECT conclusion is “I cannot be friends with Nazis” BUT PEOPLE KEEP BELIEVING THE COROLLARY “None of my friends are Nazis” “…even that one guy who keeps posting ‘ironic’ Pepe memes, who never really grew out of his 4Chan /pol/ phase, and who keeps trying to have really intense conversations with me about ‘globalists’. But he’s my friend! I’ve known him forever! He doesn’t REALLY believe any of that stuff. He’s just kind of an asshole, and we love him anyway.” This is a very bad corollary. It is an extraordinarily dangerous corollary. When we sincerely believe that we would not be friends with bad people, we ignore the signs that our friends are bad people.
(Friendly note: you can replace “Nazi” above with “sexual predator” or “racist” or “abuser”. Same hat, pretty much. There are very real reasons not to dehumanize the enemy, and they have nothing to do with the enemy’s right to humanity, and everything to do with the enemy’s ability to sneak past our lines wearing a nice-person mask.)
I’m reblogging this to my main blog because it is extremely fucking important.
