changing that line in better than revenge is actually homophobic because it removes the accidental homoerotic tension of saying your girl rival is better known for the things that she does on the mattress only to ask her to show you how much better she is immediately after
they told you it’s cleaner to wax your pussy raw remove its natural barrier completely fucking up your follicles and risking damaging your skin permanently and then they told you it’s sexy to wear polyester underwear that doesn’t let air through creating the perfect environment for all sorts of bacteria to proliferate in and also goes IN your ass creating a direct channel from your anus to your bald defenceless pussy and you believed it. you believed it
oh you thought this was a rabbit? they thought this was a rabbit? that’s fucking funny bitch. it’s fucking winnie the fucking pooh. yeah. yeah. fuck fourth of july.
nohohankerotomania-deactivated2
texting straight female friends: good morning beautiful☀️ where’s your gorgeous face ?! hope you had a wonderful sleep
texting lesbians: it’s throw bowling balls down the stairs day U better be game
texting male friends: gonna beat you to death with a pillowcase of hammers Wyd rn
there’s just something about the weight of a hammer in your hand. feels so right
abort that thang & i hope jakey dies. two mantras that should be in the heart of every true hater
oh her? she got sucked into her bong and went on a underwter adventure in the bong water for 3 years
Gets 3 XP for wandering into a corner of my bathroom I’ve technically never set a literal foot in before and I see the floating text ‘DISCOVERED: CHOLERA COLONY’ seemingly appear out of thin air before gently fading away