To kick off SHARK WEEK here is a fact
They cute
Repost because it’s my favorite time of year again shark week
If the phrase you are what you eat means anything to anyone, I can most assuredly say I am a hot pocket. Hot as fuck on the outside but is a cold icy bitch in the inside.
When you have Tourette’s and the now branded VSCO girl sound of “SKSKSK” is one of your tics since day one and I can’t even tic in Walmart without some Vally chick ask “Ooooo are you a VSCO girl too?” Ah ,no bitch, I am person who is getting Oreos to slather them in frosting and I have been doing this before you were born please leave me alone ahhhhhh
TLC
While it has many meanings the only one I care about is: TABLES LADDERS & CHAIRS
you can keep your
-Tender Loving Care
-Ten inch Long Cock
-Tomato Lettuce & Cheese
-The Learning Channel
The Beyblade cartoon show is basically a Pokémon battle but without any of the good points of Pokémon and the transformers have personified themselves to be a beyblade that two 12 year olds use to fight each other to be the best champion of them all . In addition they have special powers that you can only unleash by screaming and becoming a super Saiyan because hair ties are too constructing. Oh and atrocious amounts of lightning like the seven realms have descended upon hell to unleash unholy apocalyptic doom to all that disobey with Thor and Zeus at the front lines and a pikachu by their side amount of lightning.
Not to mention the theme song sounds like it came from a rock band that since has been disbanded and they don’t know what to say so they just repeat Beyblade on repeat but in variating ways.
Recent Pokémon Go adventure
I have caught a Weepinbell
and with the cp of 666 the only logical name was HELLS BELLS
Pokemon teams as John Mulaney quotes based on the minimal information I have from my friend
Team Instinct:
Team Mystic:
Team Valor:
Team Rocket:
Pokemon teams as John Mulaney quotes based on the minimal information I have from my friend
Team Instinct:
Team Mystic:
Team Valor:
If I had super powers my official name would be
Natural Disaster
But I would get the job done but be a whole mess in the process
Throwback to the Twinkie epidemic in American and when I became a Twinkie dealer at my school for a short period
Just wanted to share lovely art by mollymcbutter99. It’s what I needed in my life you could say she aced it
Story time
So this fella came into my work and had a router he said he purchased earlier but after he opened it he found a minor problem. There was in fact no router inside said box only newspaper and cheap bathroom tiles. The newspaper was not even from my area it was from Buffalo,NY, 377 miles away. The router came from the back in lock up and was wrapped in a sealed package.
So that was fun
Here is a photo of a shark ‘cause why not? Sharks are beautiful and deserve all the love 🖤🦈
Weird names
I swear having a weird name and working retail
is such an adventure.
- Confused looks to my name tag
- Me repeatedly saying my name after they say it wrong and then giving up and saying yes after so many tries
- “...so was your parents high or...?”
- “What was your mom on when she thought of that?”
- My own co workers getting my name wrong
- The old ladies saying they have a grandkid with a similar name and going into a whole conversation that you don’t want to be apart of