weed strain called they hit the pentagon
you just gotta call it “the pentagon” so you can hit it yourself
let’s be business partners
I hate the fucking suburbs. Just a visual metaphor for everything wrong with America. Just gas stations and chain restaurants and chiropractors and cemeteries. "Whites Only" housing developments next to rotting mobile homes next to 10 acres of grass and a two story farmhouse flying a Trump sign. The heroin flows like water here.
Precision-engineered to breed misanthropy and paranoia. Every man made petty tyrant to rule his drywall castle and only leave it in the safety of his 8,600 pound pickup truck that has never hauled more than Costco groceries. Total isolation that warps the mind into viewing anyone outside the walls of your mcmansion or ford f-150 as a threat or a pest
I was raised agnostic and tend to remain ambiguous on theological matters.
-but my house has a porch on the second story that affords me a terrific view of my neighborhood and the Colorado Front Range and I was partaking of some peace before the 4th Of July Finger-Loss Festivities begin, and I have had a
~*Spiritual Experience*~
I just watched my neighbor try to unload an actual wooden pallet that had to have been forklifted into the back of his insecurity pickup worth of fireworks.
Except that he does not have a forklift in his garage.
He does have so much sports memorabilia and cardboard boxes of unsold MLM Merchandise and patriotically themed camping gear and posters of women in bikinis and flags of suspect political organizations in his garage that there is only BARELY enough space for the fireworks and certainly none for his truck.
So he had to unload the individual boxes of recreational explosives from the back of his truck and stack them in the minimal space he had cleared by hand. This is a tedious and time-consuming process as this neighbor has purchased a wide variety of recreational and locally illegal explosives instead of many of just a few types, so the individual boxes are rather small.
He begins, and this is crucial to what happens next, by cutting apart the industrial-grade saran wrap his explosives dealer had so carefully wrapped his merchandise in, and discarded it unsecured on his lawn.
Where Outdoor Conditions sometimes happen.
tilthat
via reddit.com
so you’re telling me that “stuck a feather in his hat and called it macaroni” would be like saying “wrote a G on his belt and called it gucci”
that’s…a pretty good analogy actually
US moron came to town
Hunting for some coochie
Wrote a G up on his belt
And this bitch called it Gucci
Seeing my notifications get flooded with this every July 4th is the only thing I respect about America
Healing Grace
“Whatever faith you have in Serra, she has more in you.” —Lyra Dawnbringer
Artist: Magali Villeneuve TCG Player Link Scryfall Link EDHREC Link
when MTG first launched, Richard Garfield created a cycle of instants that encapsulated each color’s identity by doing 3 of something for 1 mana of that color:
- Blue got Ancestral Recall, which draws 3 cards. it is one of the 9 most powerful and expensive cards ever printed, and hasn’t been reprinted in decades for fear of breaking the game in half
- Black got Dark Ritual, which gives you 3 black mana (for the price of 1, so a net gain of 2). it is still a staple of combo decks looking for fast mana as one of the best options in any format it’s legal in
- Red got Lightning Bolt, which deals 3 damage to anything. it is still the gold standard against which burn spells are evaluated, and its existence singlehandedly makes the difference between 3- and 4-health creatures relevant
- Green got Giant Growth, which gives a creature +3/+3 until end of turn. its power and versatility make it beloved by new and old players alike, leading to it being one of the most reprinted cards ever
- White got Healing Salve, which heals you for 3 or prevents 3 damage, but not both. it is so laughably dogshit that you can combine both modes, making it twice as good for the same cost, and still end up with a waste of cardboard as shown here. get bent White lol
Amazing how every guide on interacting with police, including ones that are explicitly pro-cop, are indistinguishable from guides on how to avoid being attacked by a wild animal.
Don't make any sudden movements, avoid eye contact, stay calm or you WILL die. Wait, what do you mean this is advice for interacting with a human being and not a hungry bear?
"Keep your hands on the steering wheel and don't have anything in them, a police officer might mistake a cellphone for a weapon." Okay, should I also hold my hand out for him to sniff when he approaches so that he knows I'm not a threat?
Presented without comment, from your Twitter correspondent:
Wait I realized this Twitter rate limiting thing happened literally the same day as the Reddit 3rd party app shut downs. Wonder how many of those users have come here today to this Luigi Wins By Doing Nothing Ass website
