I'm afraid with the recent death, it's without a doubt that one of our guests here is a vampire. I've narrowed it down between Stacy, who was drinking "red wine" when we got here- Michael, who is goth, or Daniel, who I don't like.

Professor Acula, hand me that notepad

the "came back wrong" trope except like... they didnt. like this mad scientists wife died, and so he studied necromancy, brought her back, and she came back and it all worked. like she came back exactly the same as she was before with literally no difference. but the scientist guy is like "oh no... what have i done.... shes Different now!!!! she came back Wrong!!!!" and shes just like. chilling. reading a book. cooking dinner. shes just so so normal but in the guys mind hes like "oh shes soooo weird" but shes just normal

Peer reviewed tags from @somanyofthekids

NO its a JOKE and YOU DONT GET IT. ITS NOT THAT DEEP

While she was dead he put his memory of her on such a high pedestal that she could never live up to it alive

alternatively‚ she came back perfectly fine but he thinks she came back wrong‚ because the tragic reality is that he never actually knew his wife

im going INSANE thats MY POST.

It's your post but the journey to posting it changed it to such a degree that even its closest intimacies are now foreign to you. Sorry dude.

as a kid i had one of those “there’s a monster under my bed” moments except real.

every night i would cry about a ghost or something trying to scare me by knocking on my bedroom windows and walls. like, really loudly, every hour or so, every night. only at night. so my dad was like “heh okay kiddo let’s check it out :) ah see? there’s nothing here :)” and left.

until years later he admitted to me that he did in fact hear the unexplainable knocking when he slept in that room one night, and it kept him awake with fear. and suddenly felt awful for not believing little kid me.

imagine your kid being like “daddy there’s a demon in my closet” and you being like ok son lemme just check that for you :). and you open the door and there’s a demon in the closet

WHAT

hey folks,,,,,... glad 2 b here on tubblr . here's a little self-portrait of me,, a human male

on my way to work at the job factory :) lets get this bread !, and by bre,d i mean human money dollars haha. dont even like bred

feeding the ducks

(disclaimer: i do Not live in thi,s pond. i live in a home House.)

ah . allow me to introduce my two lovely childen . Child and Baby . :) they are both just regular Men just like their old man(me)

@elodieunderglass

Oh thank you so much! I love hearing about the activities of normal men!

here, have an extremely wholesome tiktok to detox your dash

New favorite meme: Old Economy Steven

this speaks to me in ways i didn’t know memes could

this post is from 2013 btw

Happy pride, fuckers

so i noticed that graph is based on data collected in 2011, and i got curious. the most recent one they have now is 2016.

also the website is a wonderful resource i’ve been exploring. it breaks down the intimidating complexity of US politics to help busy folks who want to understand better but don’t know where to start. and as someone who is neurodivergent, the charts and graphs they use are so helpful for comprehension!

the amount of people in the replies saying “what career” lmao

Gladly

everyone's talking about how "prev tags" is an integral part of how people use the site and now the update's ruined it and blah blah blah, but you can't fool me! I remember back when everyone was griping about how it's a degenerate innovation from twitter migrants and that real tumblr users write out the tags themselves

let it be known that i still hate it

#copy pasting out the tags is still just better

wordswithkittywitch:

To be clear since a few people aren't getting it, this is an edit referencing an idiom. The idiom says that if you slowly increase the temperature you can boil (and kill) a frog without it noticing.The idea being it acclimates over time. An article about how your body can build up tolerance to heat listed under CLIMATE SOLUTIONS is ridiculous. This is part of an ongoing gaslighting campaign by media overall to make people think climate change (specifically global warming) is not a big deal. No amount of "getting used to it over time" will help disabled people on medications that lower heat tolerance. And if this continues people will die.

All the best creatures are dumpling-shaped

blessings

tip: when you get sick of crossdressing, transition and then crossdress in the other direction. spice it up

another tip: every 'dressing' is crossdressing if you're transsexual enough about it. follow for more

I think getting vampire fangs should be considered a gender affirming procedure

Ya can't hide this gem in the tags this is actually so sweet @jellyfishdirigible

Everyone seemed to really need/appreciate this last time I did it so I'm doing it again:

This sounds like something from The Handmaid’s Tale, ffs.

This was an ad in the early 90's. I first saw it in a textbook in the late 90's, used as an example of the "slippery slope" fallacy.

Now it's over 20 years later. It's happening.