Big question
If there was an Undertale movie and these were the only two qualified actors, should Danny DeVito or Jack Black play Sans?
ntgforever
dreemurr-reblogs
Don’t you mean Adam Sans-dler
korvykins
hah….its a beautiful day outside….birds ah singin….
ntgforever
I’VE BEEN PERSONALLY ATTACKED
clatter clatter clatterclatterclatterclatterclatter [cartoon gunshot].
all 46 excuses on my friends wall,
1. i was just really, really early for tomorrow
2. we can’t all be usain bolt
3. in this day and age, we shouldn’t need labels like “late”
4. i had pe first period do you blame me
5. i really, really didn’t want to sing
6. my brother thought it would be hilarious to drop me outside the prison gates
7. you can’t tell me how to live my life
8. #YOLO
9. my legs fell off and i had to roll all the way to the emergency clinic
10. there was a freak yachting accident
11. i am a fucking retard
12. this is just for my wall
13. do you even read these
14. “it does not matter how slow you go, so long as you do not stop”
15. i spent my entire night writing tom daley fanfiction
16. my father left my mother for an air hostess seven years ago do you expect me to get over that emotional trauma overnight
17. sarah palin and i got into a twitter war and i couldn’t leave and let her win
18. traffic jammy jammy jam
19. how can i go to school when alex turner
20. my sim was having an emotional meltdown and i needed to be there for her
21. i was sticking it to the man
22. i spent my entire night worrying if i would ever lose my virginity
23. fifty shades of late; i was walking and then i caught the eye of an attractive member of the opposite sex and we began exchanging significant looks and i knew we would one day make sweet love so i just walked alongside him and tried to catch his eye and to be continued
24. part two he was playing hard to get so we walked and walked and he had the perfect hair colour it was sort of beige brown anyway it turned out he was walking to a bus stop so obviously i had to catch the bus because true love and silently we rode out to papakura and into the sunset
25. my meth lab caught fire
26. my bed is more comfortable than your school will ever be
27. i was sad
28. it was a nice day, so i walked leisurely
29. i had beat my younger brother for saying “swag”
30. i had to travel back to the 1950’s to ensure my birth
31. 2 kool 4 scool
32. i had to stop, collaborate and listen
33. i tried
34. i’m sorry i’m late
it’s not my fault
my auntie was killed
and i joined a cult
35. a haiku about lateness:
late late late late late
late late late late late late late
late late late late late
36. my best friend was telling me how to give a satisfactory blow job i wish i was joking
37. i was fashionably late
38. i was caught in a flash mob true story omfg
39. i did not choose the late life, the late life chose me
40. do
41. you
42. even
43. read
44. these
45. i was fighting al qaeda
46. traffic
YESSSS IT’S ON MY DASHBOARD AGAIN
oh yeah, in celebration of 2019, i feel like it is important to note that 2019 is the last year that chara falling into the underground can happen….
you know what that means yall, gotta go dive into a hole in a mountain this year or never
irene-the-potato
homophobes are not allowed to use computers because the inventor of the computer was gay
writingandnerdshit
People think this is just a joke but Alan Turing was the inventor of the computer and his sexuality was illegal in his time (which was not even 100 years ago) and he was arrested. They put him on drugs that destroyed his genius brain and committed suicide a year after being covicted. He was gay and a war hero as well. He helped to break enigma which was a German code that they put all their messages through. He shorted WWII by two years and saved so many lives in the process.
Friendly reminder that if not for Alan Turing you wouldn’t be reading this post and we might be ruled by the nazis
The Alan Turing statue on my campus
soph-isticated-so-s
wait fuck this is soooooo important always reblog
I was hanging around at my boyfriend’s place (in hindsight he was probably Satan) and we were just chilling, doing normal things, when a long, sleek, black car pulled up outside of his house. My boyfriend, suddenly very nervous and twitchy, told me to go and hide in the closet. When I asked him what was up, he just told me it was a “work associate” so I went and did as he said. I peeked a little bit out of the closet to see who this person was. I wanted to see who could possibly get my boyfriend, the actual Devil, to tremble in fear. And lo and behold, it was Ted Cruz.
Reflections on this post:
1. I need to read URLs.
2. “in hindsight he was probably Satan” may be the single greatest hook to a story that I’ve ever seen.
3. The levels of stress and suspense that occur in the rising action here rival that of some of the greatest survival horror works that exist on this earth.
4. “And lo and behold, it was Ted Cruz” is probably the only sentence that could make the conclusion to this story more terrifying, and ended the story in a way far superior to anything my own sense of dread could have come up with.
This dream got a freakin book review
i bet people dont understand that im joking 800% of the time
We all are mocking mafia city ads but at the end of the day, they have done what they were meant to do. Smart marketing indeed
And that... That's how Mafia works.
We all are mocking mafia city ads but at the end of the day, they have done what they were meant to do. Smart marketing indeed
gudroo
this is the last year that we can make this stupid joke so im going to make the most of it and post it every day until 2020
Greek dude: But…but I brought you a bouquet of olives to win over your heart!
Sappho, lounging on a couch with her girlfriend on her lap, popping grapes into her mouth: Oh muse, singeth to us Despacito.
i let my little sapphic hands do all the work
sustainablefarming-deactivated2
Beyonce literally took in oxygen and exhaled carbon dioxide. She literally turned. A. Gas. Into. A. Different. Gas. I don’t think yall understand that Literally no one has ever done that before.