i’m saving my brain for special occasions. if i use it every day it’ll get dirty

me irl

getting a surgery to remove my shame and embarrassment glands. gonna be GREAT for me, awful for everyone else.

where’s that quiz where you choose lke 4 colours u like and 4 u dont and it hands your ass on a plate

thank you @cumleaf @@ http://www.astro.com/cgi/atxgen.cgi?btyp=cf

This hurt my feelings

please unmute

UNMUTE

Do it

I was walking around my neighborhood and saw a bunch of police surrounding a small house for a drug bust. As I got closer, I heard the policemen barking aggressively, so naturally I was like, wtf??? And one of them caught my eye and said, “Oh, we’re trying to scare them out of there,” and minutes later a bunch of furries came out the house whimpering and shit.

please sign your posts with your url i refuse to be continuously terrified of humanity by them

When Daddy cuts my French toast for me. 💕

Oh hey look it’s me! I usually cut up kittens food but I always ask her just in case she ever wants to be a big girl. I love you lil britches mwuah

*Banging table* CUMMIES CUMMIES CUMMIES

hE WEARING AN ED EDD AND EDDY SHIRT NOBODY GONNA SAY SHIT ABoUT THIS

he made her eat the doo doo 

str-yrats

You guys wouldn’t understand the relationship between a kitten and her daddy

It’s the 2nd anniversary of the day theyoungdaddy lost his kitten all because of a little doo doo

Happy Father’s Day everyone

this abomination of a post will survive the tumblr purge of 2018

This can’t be topped

2018 is almost over and all I gotta say is what the fuck was that

character in a fight scene: *restrains their opponent by pinning them against the wall by their wrists*

me:

character in a fight scene: *pins their opponent down by straddling their waist and holding their wrists to the floor*

me:

character in a fight scene: *lifting their disarmed opponent’s chin slightly with the business end of their weapon*

me:

when its a man doing it to a woman:

If depression was a musical

This is a bop

what did frosty the snowman do other than come to life, do a little dance, then die

isn’t that all anyone ever does, really

every time a straight man walks all I hear in my head is the slapping of a clown’s shoes, and when he talks? a clown horn noise

Guilty.

Baby boomers pass on the Earth to future generations, 2018

girls reblog if you love it when guys do this

leave

Would you dismiss the wise words of a sage simply because their face was scarred or otherwise disfigured? I think not, and yet you engage in just this type of prejudice when you ignore my opinions on Vaccines simple because my profile picture is a Busty Minion.

there was absolutely no way to predict where this post was going

I like ginger ale. Light carbonation and flavor… it’s a neat little drink lol

tea

no, ginger ale.

no the post is tea

it’s about ginger ale