laughed way too hard at this [x]

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ME

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i remember in second grade i got a new purple sharpener and this girl who i was “friends” with asked me to have it and I was like ???? no my mom just bought this for me yesterday and she said “if you dont give me the sharpener we’re not friends anymore” and i just said “okay” and she was like “So you’re giving me the sharpener??” and i was like “why are you talking to me? we’re not friends” and i wish i was still as savage as i was back then

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Make her pussy wet not her eyes.

Make his dick hard not his life

Break her bed not her heart

play with her boobs not her feelings

Get on his dick not his nerves.

always salt your pasta while boiling it 

“…but I keep cruising, can’t stop, won’t stop moving…”

when will i find a man like this

I’m the bust a nut part

what even was this film

100 notes and i’ll move this pinecone slightly to the left

absolute ledge she actually did it im logging out!!!!!!!

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