“The dead begin to rise. Jorah, the Andal battles on. He has been slashed and stabbed, pummeled and pierced, but somehow he keeps fighting. Wights plunge their knives into him. He takes more punishment than Hodor took at the door, than Beric took in the Great Hall and still somehow Jorah stands and defends his Queen. Dany tries to rouse Jorah, but he is gone.”

Share this Bran of luck to get a job without any experience

Bonus: 

Harry Potter and the Chamber of War

by Ryan Gitter.

Timeline of the 42nd Millennium: 001.M42

* The Legion of the Damned appears on more than a hundred worlds, including Baal and Armageddon, to fight for the Imperium.

So we’re not going to talk about how long these racks have been on my bedroom floor.🙊 Instead let’s focus on the fact that they’re up now; tangible proof of how much progress these kiddos have made in two years! Never could have done it without their amazing senpais and sensei.

Humans are adorable.

Supporting evidence:

1. Humans say ‘ow’, even if they haven’t actually been hurt. It’s just a thing they say when they think they might have been hurt, but aren’t sure yet.

2. Humans collect shiny things and decorate their bodies and nests with them. The shinier the better, although each individual has a unique taste for style and colouring

3. Humans are not an aquatic or even amphibious species, but they flock to bodies of water simply to play in it. They can’t even hold their breath all that long; they just love to splash!

4. When night falls and the sky goes dark, humans become drowsy and begin to cocoon themselves in soft, fluffy bedding.

5. Some humans spend time in each other’s nests! Just for fun! It’s not their nest; they’re just visiting each other.

6. Some humans use pigments and dyes to make their bodies flashy and colourful! They even attach shiny dangly bits to their cartalidgous membranes!

7. Humans are very clever, and sometimes adopt creatures from other species into their family units. They don’t seem to notice the obvious differences, and often raise them alongside their own young!

8. If a human sees another creature in distress, they can commonly be observed trying to help! Even at their own risk, most humans are deeply compassionate creatures!

9. If a human hears a particularity catchy sound or tune, it will often mimic it, even to the point of annoying themselves!

10. Sneezes are entirely involuntary, and completely adorable. Especially when the human in question becomes frustrated

11. Humans love treats!!! Some more than others. Many humans will save these treats specifically for a later date when they are in need of comfort or reassurance. IE, pickles, pop tarts, Popsicles, etc

12. They’re learning to travel in space!!! They can’t get very far, but they’re trying!!! So far, they’ve made it to the end of their yard, and have found rocks

this sounds like it was written by a really enthusiastic alien humanologist

Depression

5 reasons your martial art sucks.

Martial arts of any kind are really considered a niche kind of ‘sport’. So we can assume that… not everyone likes it. Here are some reasons why.

1. You don’t learn how to fight.

You don’t. Face it, whatever martial art you are practicing, when you let yourself in an MMA cage fight or a Kickboxing match: you’re most likely screwed. And I put it nicely there. You can’t fight, it doesn’t work.

(… even in martial arts movies we’re portrayed as losers)

2. There’s a huge imbalance when it comes to diversity.

Now this might be local of course, but mostly the amount of male participants is (way) higher than females’. In my own dojo I’m one of the two (!) adult women. The demography is mostly better with the children, but it’s rarely 50/50.

3. You don’t earn any respect.

You thought getting into martial arts would finally land you some real respect and people would start treating you like a human being that is, in fact, awesome? Think again. If they have even HEARD of your martial art and you don’t have to spend ten minutes explaining it, then you still get smacked in the face with the fact that people think martial arts are only for nerds who need help sticking up for themselves.

You might think: “Oh but you do Karate, that’s easy, everyone knows that.” Not even close. I always have to explain that Karate isn’t Judo and explaining that my style of Karate has Jiu Jitsu in it makes the whole thing even more complicated..

4. It leaves you bruised and beaten.

I remember having to run back and forth to the coffee corner at my work to get another batch of wet towels to cool my extremely bruised finger, 4 days before my black belt exam. A bit awkward to say the least, especially since your sweet co-workers will ask what’s up.

Also, I came into school one day with a black eye. Everyone in school thought I had gotten into a fight. I just went along with it because… well because I didn’t want to admit I actually failed to deflect one of the many Frisbee discs that were thrown at me by two black belts.

5. It’s a real commitment.

There are people who just come in once a week to do their thing and that’s it. That’s fine, but if you really want to get somewhere and earn that black belt you have to invest. I trained 4 to 5 times a week for before I earned my black belt. I saw my training partner more than my actual partner. Naturally that took a lot of understanding from my partner, not everyone can do that.

Well that sounds like a royal drag, why would I even start?

1. You learn something more than just fighting. You might not be a cage fighter, but you do learn how to defend yourself. You learn the of the ways of budo. You strengthen your soul, your mind, your body, everything. A true budoka is mostly not just a good fighter, but also a good person.

2. Men everywhere Okay so the girls aren’t as represented yet as the guys are. And yes there are an overwhelming amount of Caucasian males that run the show… Welcome to the world. If you mind the lack of women in your dojo, invite them! Encourage them to try out, encourage others to bring women in! Make sure that diversity is happening, in every way possible.

Until my brown belt, I never even met a female sensei. I never had a female sensei teach me. Now, I AM ONE. 

Lead, by example.

3. You don’t earn any respect? Well, I might’ve lied a little. Look in your school years, you don’t get any respect (sorry). They’ll just sneer at you and ask you to ‘give ‘em a little show’. What I hope is that you have earned your own respect and are able to say no to those losers who make your life miserable. In the corporate world however, it is respected if you are (still) doing something you love as a hobby and actually acclaimed some sort of title in it (like a black belt or a teacher’s license). Also, martial arts mostly mean that people are calm, collected, good listeners and disciplined people. All good traits if you ask me!

4. You’ll get beat up. Only a little at times…? Look, if you didn’t like it a little at the very least, you probably quit already. But you know what? I’m just going to put it out there: getting a punch or a kick will toughen you up. Now I’m not saying beating children is okay (never). But getting hit the first time is huge shock and you’ll cry, the second time you’ll have a scare and a sniffle, the third time you might already be able to suck it up and continue. Not because you’ve been yelled at to do so, but because you are training yourself mentally.

That commitment One of my sensei-in-life (a.k.a. mother’s) sayings is: there is always a choice. You might not feel like it, but there is always a choice. And she is right. If you cannot fit that extensive training program in your busy life, then don’t. If you are mentally not ready to commit even though someone might ask it, you can perhaps try it, but if it really doesn’t go that well, then don’t.

Remember: The reason you are doing this is because it is FUN.

BONUS ‘YOURMARTIALARTSUCKS’-FACT

You are committing your whole life to trying imitate what some (mostly) Japanese deceased men invented. 

Great. By the way: you’ll never get it perfectly right, ever. Great.

But you know what?

It brings you: joy, friends, a healthier body, a peaceful mind, a longer lifespan, inner strength, laughter, perseverance, discipline, this ‘amazing’ blog, a feel of home in the dojo, some great stories to tell and most of all: FUN. That’s all I need.

What is defeat? Nothing but education; nothing but the first step to something better.

—Bruce Lee

Hai, Miyagi-Sensei

When someone finds out I’m a martial artist and says “oh, I’d better not mess with you”

I’m like

Above: The Japanese Kanji for Goju Ryu, the ‘hard-soft style’ of karate-do. A traditional style bred from the roots of Okinawan Naha-Te, Sensei Chogun Miyagi is it’s founder. This is my style, and there is little more in this world that I love as much as it’s kata and spirit. Yes, I may wander the world of the martial arts and try my hand at different styles, but I will always consider Goju-Ryu my true home, where my heart will always reside.

Karate for olympics, yay or nay?

So I will make this short and bittersweet:

I love karate, I really do. But sport karate has never really been part of my routine. Sport karate does ADD to shaping a karate-ka. But it does not add to karate itself in my opinion, not as a martial way.

Positive sides to sportkarate:

And to me, that’s about it. But in my opinion this is what it comes down to:

Kumite - a game of tag

Yup, a game of tag. Tag, you’re it, I scored a point! Oh and the running around screaming when they think they’ve scored a point? 

Ugh. Think I’m over exaggerating?

This is just a small example, search YouTube for kumite championships and you’ll find it allover. I’m not saying that this is a disgrace for karate, it is just how a sport evolved. Or in my opinion, devolved. Where is the real fight?!

Kata - A beautiful play

Now, I admit it, I love watching kata championships, it looks awesome. But in the back of my head there’s always this little voice whispering: this is so not… realistic? In any form, shape or way? Aren’t they going a bit too far with this?

European Karate Championships 2015 ITA va. ESP Male team kata final.  So pretty to look at!

I will only quote what Hanshi Suzuki Tatsuo (8th Dan Wado karate)  said about kata competition:

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