DNI

Certain words can change your brain forever and ever so you do have to be very careful about it.

decriminalize:

criminalize: 

oh my god

Screaming RSVP during my next orgasm so they know I’m cumming

rb with whether people assume you’re older or younger than your actual age

(curled up against him in bed after earth-shattering sex, running my hands across his chest) that last song you sent in the #music channel....it was sooo good. You have such sophisticated taste....

(We make out again; he starts to drift away into sleep)

(I get up out of bed)

But y'know, I couldn't help but think...

(I start rummaging around in my nighstand drawers)

I'm not sure I've ever seen you acknowledge the music anyone else posts in there? Not one reply, not one emoji react, in the entire three years of our server's existence?

And yet ..

(The sound of a gun cocking; he opens his eyes)

You just keep on giving us spotify links, don't you?

The only parallel to ever exist btw

using the wrong password and still being asked if i want to save it is like the most insulting thing. little wrong password baby do you wanna save your goddamn wrong password for all of eternity. you stupid idiot

please elon dont change twitters branding i'm begging you

I think most stories could benefit from having two characters whose relationship is just "those two guys" (gender neutral). Most of the time if you look for one of them you'll find both of them. They can hate each other or be the best of friends or something in-between but they just can't find that same spark with anyone else. Their relationship is best described as "do not separate them". They are fully fleshed out characters individually but if either of them are left alone without the other for any reason it feels so wrong.

Cows reaction when they see grass after being shut down indoors for 6 months. 

(via)

This is also common practice in Sweden. Dairy cows are kept indoors during the winter, then released into their pasture in spring. The kosläpp (release of the cows) is an annual event usually open to visitors. There’s even an expression derived from it.

it’s so marvelous to me that humans make an annual event of gathering around specifically to watch cows experience joy. the humans are excited that the cows are excited, to the point they make sure the human kids get front row seats, cause they know the kids will be extra excited. there is so much vicarious joy here. how remarkable a world, where we do things specifically for the pleasure of seeing other people and creatures happy.

Guys is it privileged to go home?

The Haters must never find my giant secret ziplock bag of scented wax melts

[ID: A cat sticks its head into a hole and comes sniffing down towards you]

NO NO NO NO NO MY WAX

is that a spider in your pocket or are you 8 penises and venomous to see me

@natalieironside ❤️

::::)

steven is a really funny character actually. he never went to school. one of his powers is astral projection for no real reason. hes a musical prodigy. he was so traumatized by the end of the show they had to make an entire epilogue series about it. he spent seven years looking like a 3rd grader. he was even bisexual

he went to the center of the earth. he saved the world in flip flops. he broke his bones every day and didnt even notice. he killed someone

he didn’t have a bellybutton. he actively chose to eat super crispy bits of potato that got left in the deep fryer. he lived in a house but his dad lived in a car within walking distance of his house. he could revive people from the dead. all of his clothes were concert merchandise. he had an outdoor washing machine. he was put on trial for murder. he broke both federal and state child labor laws

The murder he was on trial for was different than the murder he committed

The murder he went on trial for was a murder his mom committed. The victim of the murder was also his mom.

he plead guilty

Im allergic to hookup culture and too weird to participate anyway. Die in my arms.

the what

*coughs* Friendly doll person here.

So Mattel came out with different Barbie body types a couple years ago, right? There’s your normal body, but there’s also Curvy, Petite, and Tall now.

Around the same time, they came out with the Made to Move body, which has a ton more articulation than your normal Barbie.

Customizers love the Made to Move body, because hey, a lot more fun positions to put a doll in for photographing. But now Mattel has started making the Made to Move dolls with the additional body types from above. We’ve gotten a Curvy Made to Move doll so far, afaik.

This Queen Elizabeth doll, though? Is the first time there’s been a Petite Made to Move body released by Mattel. So customizers were buying it up not out of any care about Queen Elizabeth — but they were buying it to pop her head right off and use the new body for other dolls!

The thing i like the most about tumblr is learning tiny details about communities i would otherwise not even be aware of. thank you for this info