vampires can't creampie you until you ask them to come inside

heh. i do my best for my people

there’s a fucking furry at the mall!!!!

what the hell is an “"easter bunny”“

My app crashed three times trying to reblog this, and I feel that was the universe trying to stop me from giving others whiplash.

this is simply the greatest video i have ever seen

I'm going to reblog this a million times so be it

#i love how they give up on the dumb gimmick and just make her do increasingly inane trick shots

And she looks like she's having fun, which is the most important part

guy who takes a bite out of the blunt when you pass it to him

losing my mind over this spam message i just got

my extremely niche pet peeve is when people get so excited about the possibility of communicating to “other lifeforms” (meaning aliens) but then literally discount every single form of communication outside of ‘language,’ and also show zero interest in communication with any life form here on Earth. like you discount communication systems of every other creature on this planet, to whom you’re related, because they’re too different, but you think a creature that evolved entirely separately with no common ancestors would communicate following the standards of human language? you think you’ll find commonality with them before finding commonality with those who literally adapted to the same conditions as you and share the experiences of this planet with you and grew up alongside you? a mushroom has more in common with you than an alien would

my children have too many legs .. but they are handsome and strong

last drawing of 2020

PSA: Dating a country boy does not make you country. I repeat, dating a country boy DOES NOT make you country

📢 yes beckie tell us ! 📢

Stop her name is literally beckie!?

*deletes your nudes to make space for dog pics*

the girl reading this

what abt her?

shes reading this

This is a comment someone appended to a photo of two men apparently having sex in a very fancy room, but it’s also kind of an amazing two-line poem? “His Wife has filled his house with chintz” is a really elegant and beautiful counterbalancing of h, f, and s sounds, and “chintz” is a perfect word choice here—sonically pleasing and good at evoking nouveau riche tackiness. And then “to keep it real I fuck him on the floor” collapses that whole mood with short percussive sounds—but it’s still a perfect iambic pentameter line, robust and a lovely obscene contrast with the chintz in the first line. Well done, tumblr user jjbang8

hold on you visualize as you read?

if you have a whole cinematic experience when reading books go fuck yourself. absorb the words in an abstract manner like the rest of us.

so stupid that stuff like this doesnt happen anymore

Myndarlegur

Longing

i sat on these attempts at crossbreeds for like a week before The Mood™ just completely evaporated so. here✨

(by ‘sat on’ i obviously mean that i Thought about them real hard for a week and spent maybe half an hour total actually drawing them)

weird how prey animals are considered weak when they’re the evolutionary result of millions of years of constant fighting for survival

Dude you do NOT mess with prey animals they are the ones to look death in the face and say “Imma die beating that ass”