Knowing Bilbo’s effect on elvenkings and elven lords (and elves in general), it’s probably just as well Thingol never made it to the Third Age.  He wouldn’t have stood a chance.

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gandalf looking after the hobbits:

Just in case you need a laugh today…

The potential of a super-extended edition of The Hobbit trilogy

I am really really hoping for a Super-Extended version of the Hobbit movies in the next few years. Peter Jackson has teased over the years about a super-extended Lord of the Rings version for the 25th anniversary of those. (it’s one reason he gave for the lack of deleted scenes in the special features). But I’m way more interested in this for The Hobbit. LOTR didn’t feel like it was missing any scenes, but the Hobbit ones I feel and know there are. They were very much meddled with by Warner Bros, unlike LOTR, and while I think they are still great movies, they could be made better.

Battle of the Five Armies was hit hardest by the Executive Meddling, and it shows. Even the Extended Edition was. Jackson had actually added on about 30 mins to it. But the final added time was only 15. Warner Bros had apparently edited out 15 mins without telling him right before it was released in theaters and blu-ray. Which is… just WTF.

Read on for the scenes I know and suspect are missing from The Hobbit Trilogy and the Battle of the Five Armies in particular. Mostly Thorin’s Company stuff, because the Dwarves/Elves/Men balance feels uneven.

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A Mother's Wrath

A followup to "A Mother's Grief"

I know Tolkien never explicitly stated that Galadriel came two inches from blasting the Misty Mountains into rubble in the effort to rescue Celebrían but he implied it with every word and sentence he ever wrote about her so 🤷‍♀️

Not featured: Elladan and Elrohir bringing up the rear killing masses of orcs and goblins in their wake

*best viewed on dashboard as tumblr blog themes seem to mess up the quality!

What a rollercoaster of feelings, right?

Watch this.

Aziraphale is literally a perfect angel.

This is the angel that (maybe he knows maybe he doesn't) tried to murder him and he's still SO POLITE.

I WISH I had that level of emotional regulation when talking to certain people and occasionally toddlers. 😂😂

Baby can do a little a cocaine, as a treat

inch resting to repost a journal comic someone made abt their new parenthood without credit BUT ANYWAY: this art is by Kate Beaton, author of Ducks, and creator of Hark! A Vagrant, which you know about even if you don’t know about it! 

The black areas represent the remaining natural dark skies in the United States

I’ve been in the middle of the ocean at night and now live in texas and it is so hard to explain to people that no, they have not ever seen the night sky. It is so hard to explain to people that what they think is a proper night sky is fucking pathetic. A disgrace.

People talk about how you can’t see stars in the city and yeah, that’s true, but their concept of “seeing stars” is being able to make out orion’s belt.

So, so few people have see the sky in all its glory and it’s not sad. It’s a fucking crime. Seeing a perfectly dark night, no clouds, not a hint of light pollution? That’s a fucking religious experience.

The sky the vast vast majority of us grew up with is not the sky that inspired us to look up. It is not the sky that inspired constellations. You can’t even see most constellations.

Your ancestors looked at the night sky and said “surely, that is where the gods must live.” And you might be lucky if you can see hardly more than a handful of stars.

The sky is full, fucking FULL, of stars, and you’ve never seen them.

I remember waking up at 3am in Wadi Rum, fumbling for my glasses, and then GRABBING ON TO THE MATTRESS so I didn’t fall into the sky. It felt bright enough to read. I understood how Kepler figured out the Milky Way was a disc and we were on the edge of it. Every myth or legend I’d ever heard made sense. I elbowed the guy next to me, and he went “Wha–HOLY SHIT”. Four of us climbed up a hill next to the campsite. We could have started a religion.

This, and swimming in the sea.

i went to the dentist today and my dentist honest to god said “can i ask you a question…….what the hell is in your mouth”

it was in awe lmao

then the hygienist and assistant all came over to look too and they were like “wooooow” and my ass was sitting there like

oh my god i posted this and then went to work, and

story time

okay so to preface this, my hometown where i’m originally from is a really fucking weird place. like from the outside it seems like a normal suburban town, but once you’re there for awhile you get the feeling that’s something’s not…quite all together. a lot of people are really fucking weird there — so much so that that was a running joke in school growing up, that people in the town were just like that. everyone knew not to go out to the farm lands surrounding the town especially at night, we called it “the cuts” and people used to disappear out there all the time or get shot at by the especially weird people that would live out there. the news was and still is truly a thing of horror. every time i come back i’m regaled with even more stories of crazy shit that has happened there.

to put it in perspective we generally never had “normal crime” like robbery or anything like that when i lived there, though that did happen sometimes. the news stories were always like, “a kid was kidnapped by local residents and tortured in a house around the corner,” “a random person was chased down and shot for sport in a really nice neighborhood,” “someone was gored to death by a bull while out car shopping,” etc. (these are all real, btw). everyone does drugs and the whole town is located really close to a government site where they test nuclear weapons and chemicals and shit. this is how i grew up, in this bizarre environment.

i need to preface it this way so that you get that it’s weird. it’s a fucking weird place. i used to listen to the welcome to night vale podcast and make comparisons from it to my hometown, that’s how weird it is.

i only say this so you know that this town is where i got my orthodontics from.

all the kids in my town went to this one particular orthodontist. i also used to go to a dentist in town that a lot of people went to as well. i had a permanent retainer put on my bottom teeth after braces and no one had ever said anything to me about the model of retainer itself or it being weird type of retainer at all. i saw a ton of other people (mostly other kids that were my age at the time) that had the same type of retainer as me too so i never thought about it.

so i kept my retainer in — it’s never caused me problems and it keeps my teeth straight, why not?

however i went to a dentist for the first time in a metropolitan area now, and when he saw it in my mouth his literal first reaction was to say “uh can i ask you a question….what the hell is that”

LITERALLY the words that he said

which in hindsight makes almost too much sense. of course my town of all towns would put these weird unnecessary contraptions in kids’ mouths, and of course it happened so much that everyone just thought it was normal. that sounds exactly, to a T, like my hometown.

my permanent bottom retainer is apparently this prototype that is so rare that he’s literally never seen it before in his life, not in dental school, nowhere. it’s not that it’s an outdated type, it’s just rare as fuck. they were still staring at pictures of it on my chart in wonder when i left the office.

so just know somewhere out there, in a weird ass suburban town where they test nuclear weapons and a good portion of the residents go fucking nuts, there’s probably hundreds of people still walking around with this same contraption in their mouth that exists nowhere else in the world thinking, “yeah, that’s cool. that makes sense. let me go drink the definitely not-contaminated water now and never move away from here.”

This sounds like an X-files episode

Okay, so I looked into it and I think that the town is Tracy, California.

I looked up the bull-murder thing OP mentioned and Tracy seemed to be only town that came up with a matching case. Though the man didn’t actually die from his injuries everything else matches up one for one. So just to make sure that it was the right town I looked to see if there was any murder-torture of young people in Tracy, and unfortunately there was. It was a 17 year old boy who escaped and survived the torture. And just to solidify that it was in fact Tracy I looked up shootings in residential areas and there was one of a 20 year old man who was shot and killed in a nice neighborhood.

Okay, but I decided to look into Tracy more to find out more information about it and the town is super suspicious. There’s been a lot of murders and shooting in the town. Back in 2009 an 8 year old girl, Sandra Cantu, was kidnapped and murdered by a Sunday school teacher who said she had no idea why she killed Sandra. Another case happened in 2018 when four underage boys were shot and one was killed by four teenage boys. There’s a lot of news stories on shootings, homicides, and drug busts in that town. It’s a really cute town from the outside, if you just look up Tracy, California there’s a lot of really cute businesses and nice articles on sweet things that happen in the town, but if you actually look into it the town is really sketchy.

So yeah, this sketchy town with a military base, multiple homicides and shootings is maybe Tracy, California.

………………..yeah, you guys caught me

i grew up in tracy

also i have to add another person’s tags to this since it’s honesty hour because they’re hilarious and true

Honestly I wasn’t even surprised when I found out it was in California. Even less surprised when googled it and found out it was near the Bay Area. That sounds about right.

Apparently the motto is “Think Inside the Triangle” and I’m not sure how to feel about that.

Im rebolgging just to add that it’s illegal to see the news from the city in UE. Like, LITERALLY:

it’s….what now

Please get out of this place

How did this post get weirder

Oh god my mom used to live in a town like that but like worse (not as far as weirdness, but like culturally worse)

So. Elk Mound Wisconsin. Very small population, very isolated. The water was neon orange, which is not uncommon in areas near mining. It’s because of the copper.

My mom moved around a lot so she didn’t grow up there, just lived there for a few years, in a condemned house, which a lot of the houses in the town were.

90% of people in the town had inverted nipples. Incest was common. One family had a set of quadruplets that were not identical, but they all died in a car crash and a couple of years later the family had a second set of nonidentical quadruplets that grew up to be identical to the first set of quadruplets. The condemned house my mom lived in was haunted by a (benign) ghost, that at one point threw things off shelves. My mom initially thought it was a trick but could find no way for it to have been done, and the weird stuff continued. At one point my mom poisoned the crops of one of her neighbors bc they ran down her dog for fun (they had serious problems) and the neighbors in question thought she was a witch and burned a cross into their yard. In a separate, later, incident, she and her siblings were walking to school and fellow students and teachers kept throwing rocks at them (sizable rocks, and many) attempting to stone them to death. It didn’t work mainly bc my mom and her siblings hunted squirrels via thrown rock so they started catching the rocks and throwing them back. There was a summer camp on a superfund site (I don’t remember if it was in the town or just near the town) where kids could learn farm work and logging work and earn some money (like a dollar per day, but that doesn’t matter bc it was child labor anyways). The water there would seep up from the ground in neon green puddles and kids splashed around in it and drank from it. This was one of the bands in WI where those magnetic rocks could be found, but the overall magnetic effect in some places was like. weirdly strong. There was one area that you straight up couldn’t use a compass in and people used to disappear there all the time. Sometimes in “hunting accidents” that very clearly were not accidents, but other times these disappearances were unexplained or attributed to supernatural forces. Most of the townspeople had a much easier time believing in supernatural forces than magnets messing with compasses. Which I would blame on the inbreeding and contaminated water, but might not be so unreasonable to believe if you were also raised in a town where some people purportedly had psychic powers. If I’m remembering the correct town (there were a couple ones with really high death rates), the death rates were insane, there were 24 people in my mom’s school when she moved there, and 8 when she left (not counting herself and her siblings in either of those numbers).

I have no idea how much it has changed since then, so I looked it up out of curiosity and found out about the haunted tower that supposedly has a literal dragon under it (lol) so yea i guess the town’s still weird.

hey op?

lmao i asked my mom about it and she said that sounds about right

today’s obsession is ancient tattoos, in particular the s-curved floral-antlered deer of the Siberian Ice Maiden and Scythian Chieftain. 

it’s such a heavily used trope in modern media (off the top of my head I can think of Pokemon, Annihilation, Bambi, Snow White and the Huntsman, etc) and why wouldn’t it be! antlers look like branches, branches look like antlers, it’s only natural to pair them

but it makes me strangely emotional that our brains have always worked this way, and been drawn to the same imagery over and over again. 

I’m also going to resist the urge to make paired enamel pins of these ancient deer, even though I deeply desire little wearable tributes of the past

The Winnipeg Tribune, Manitoba, December 8, 1932

Be ungovernable, Gladys.